Football Page 1579 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Michael Irvin's Curious Company
OK, time for a Michael Irvin update. On Friday, Irvin was cited for having drug paraphernalia in his automobile — wouldn't it be great if Irvin drove a Cooper Mini, by the way? — and yesterday (and today) he's defending himself....
Excuse Our Excretory Humor
OK, we're going entirely from memory here, since we haven't been able to find anything else about the exchange on the Web, but that's fine, we'd like to take credit for seeing it anyway. It will reveal just how puerile we really are....
Jeremy Shockey, Premature Joculator
For anyone who missed the end of the Giants-Seahawks game yesterday, Giants kicker Jay Feely missed three field goals late to cost the team a victory. (Oh, as mentioned earlier: Daily News: "Sinking Feely." Post: "Feely The Pain.")...
Good Monday Morning, America!
The above picture, which should seriously be the first thing you see when you turn on your computer Monday morning after a long holiday weekend, is from the trailer for the new Adam Sandler comedy Benchwarmers....
NFL Roundup: Fore!
• Honestly, what more can you say about Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson? This will almost certainly be a poll later this week, but his "putt the football with the pilon followed by a Tiger Woods fist pump" was, once again, completely inspired. (All it was missing was an awkward high five.) If t...
Once A Cowboy, Always A Cowboy
Well, at least we know where Rush Limbaugh was getting all his Oxycontin....
Athlete Run-Ins: Smokin' John Elway
We only have one athlete run-in story today, because it's the day after Thanksgiving and we're taking a half day. Wednesday's Scott Podsednik story was excellent — though it had a few people wondering if Podsednik had a legitimate, serious alcohol problem — but today's brings up something we alway...
Wait ... It's Mariucci's Fault?
After watching that wretched Lions' loss to the Falcons yesterday — we'll do anything to make the NFL take away the guaranteed Lions homegame on Thanksgiving every year; that game is NEVER competitive — word is starting to rumble: The Lions are considering firing coach Steve Mariucci. This is Mari...
A T.O And Rosenhaus Thanksgiving
Every wonder what a Terrell Owens-Drew Rosenhaus Thanksgiving might have been like? Blogger The Mighty MJD has, and, in what has to be a sports blog first, actually writes short story about it. It's just Owens and Rosenhaus, alone in a room, each silent in their thoughts as they watch Jeff Garcia ...
University Of Miami: Complete Assheads
In one of the more ridiculous travesties of justice we can possibly think of happening on a college campus — save for maybe Nick Lachey living with Matt Leinart — the University of Miami has kicked blogger Kyle Munzenrieder out of campus housing after he posted a two-year-old rap song from Miami f...
Eagles Finally Get A Win!
Well, that settles that, then: Arbitrator Richard Bloch has ruled against Terrell Owens, whose suspension will remain throughout the rest of the season. It has come to the point that the Eagles, frankly, will take any victory they can right now....
Greg Gall Free To Stumble Down Street
Fans of America, you can now breathe easier: You can still get shit-faced, run onto the field and slap Carson Palmer on the ass, and you won't have to worry about much time in the clink. A day after a zealous prosecutor threatened to put crazed Bengals "fan" Greg Gall away for 30 days for becomin...
Will T.O.'s "Dick Suspension" Stand?
As we await with slightly baited air the decision from arbitrator Richard Bloch on Terrell Owens' suspension — Newsday is reporting that the suspension will be reduced — we admit we have mixed feelings on the case. On the one hand, yeah, the Eagles are totally justified in getting rid of him. By a...
Polls: You Love You Some Sheriff
Well, the readers have spoken, and in yet another trouncing — we never have any close polls around here, which we suppose is our fault — your favorite Clinton Portis costume is Sheriff Gonna Getcha, with 38.1 percent of the vote. (We think it's the Led Zeppelin shirt; impossible to resist it.) Sec...
Throwing The Book At Greg Gall
Some more news from our old friend Greg Gall, the guy who has spent an inordinate amount of time drinking with Deadspin readers. (By the way, we will be in Cincinnati for Thanksgiving week, so Greg, hey, drop us a line, we'll chat.) Ordinarily, when American Heroes like Gall bolt onto the field, t...
Student Athletes Rule!
From the Angry College Professors department comes an email forwarded to us from the land of the USC Trojans. Fullback Mike Brittingham, a former walk-on with only one catch this year (though, assuredly, a lot of blocks), apparently missed a conference with one of his professors in October because...
Vote: Which Is The Best Portis Alter Ego?
For those of you who haven't been paying attention to the gradual, meticulous mental breakdown of Clinton Portis, the Redskins running back has been dressing up as a new "character" — and, Method-like, staying in character during interviews — for each media conference every Thursday. (It is to Por...
Until Next Year, Donovan
The news just broke, if it can be counting as "news" or "breaking:" Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb will miss the rest of the season after having surgery on his hernia, a surgery that sounds deeply unpleasant all kinds of thoughts here, not the least of which that by the time McNabb plays again,...
NFL Roundup: Lovie's Kind Of Town
• So here's something crazy: With a break or two, the Chicago Bears could have playoff home-field advantage in the NFC. Still, whether they win the Super Bowl or not, "Ditka" is always going to sound cooler than "Lovie." • We're really starting to maybe think that Chesnning might really lead the C...
Chad Johnson Loves Even Non-Lesbian Cheerleaders
We know the Bengals lost yesterday, but it's pretty obvious now that Chad Johnson is our favorite player in the NFL. He has brought a new, brilliant quality to touchdown celebrations: The backstory. Earlier this year, Johnson did the Riverdance against the Bears that might very well have been mock...