Football Page 1611 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
At Least He Wouldn't Let Chris Henry Drive Drunk
Here's a nifty little cartoon to help you kill a little time this afternoon....
Want To Boo Someone, Eagles Fans? Try The Team Accountant
See, this is what the Eagles get for naming Andy Reid's son the new team accountant. Eagles running back Brian Westbrook was owed a $3 million roster bonus this off-season, and the Eagles paid it to him... twice....
Pretty Good. Prettaaaaay, Prettaaaaay, Pretty Good.
So you know the gruesome Jets draft video from yesterday? Well, to make sure the Jets have no more draft disasters, they're bringing in the big guns ... they're bringing in Larry David....
Razorbacks Fans Are Terrifying
So you know the crazed Razorbacks message board fan who went through the impressive measure of FOIAing coach Houston Nutt's cellphone records, discovering that he had been text-messaging a local female reporter? Well, his quest to rid Arkansas of Nutt is not over; as you can see in this video, he's ...
You Just Can't Trust MapQuest Sometimes
So you're pissed, right? We mean, you're really freaking ticked off. Your teammate has flummoxed you for the last time. So now you're at his house. You've got a handgun in your car, a shotgun by your side, and it's 4:30 a.m. It's time for revenge; you came here to kick ass and chew gum, and you're a...
Wild Times In Fayetteville
So you know last week, when all that information about Arkansas coach Houston Nutt came out thanks to a resourceful fan? Well, even though national media has been strangely loathe to report on it — "Only WE can file federal FOIAs!" — the news has apparently made it back to the Nutt home, because Dia...
Welcome To The Island Of Doomed Men
The NFL Draft is just more than two weeks away, and because we're slowly warming ourselves up to the prospect of watching Chris Berman read names off a Teleprompter for six hours, we thought we'd bring back one of our favorite videos, which pops up around this time every year....
So It Goes, Drew Bledsoe
So not to be a big freaking cliche or anything — "My Gosh, the inexorable forward march of time sure does strike me, as someone in my mid-twenties/early-thirties, as something that is unique and particular only to me!" — but seriously, though: The fact that Drew Bledsoe retired yesterday legitimatel...
Get Out Your Planner: NFL Schedule Is Out
This is Pac Man Jones. He won't be taking part in any NFL games this year, which makes him similar to you, or us, or popular musician C.C. DeVille. He will be able to watch, though, and as of this afternoon, he knows when he'll be able to watch which games. That's right: As you might have noticed fr...
Chris Henry's Scheduling Conflict
The Sports Oasis brings up an excellent point regarding the suspension of Bengals wide receiver Chris Henry: How much money he will lose will depend entirely on when the Bengals' bye week is....
Bill Romanowski Just Can't Quit You
With inflation being what it is, we feel that we have to be very prudent with our entertainment dollar. That's why we will only see new movies with the following fun synopsis:...
Pac Man Jones Will Take A Year Off
This might ultimately be for the betterment of the league, but man, it's gonna make 2007 considerably less fun around here....
Michael Irvin, Assaulting Contractors
We haven't had a good Michael Irvin story in a while, and, frankly, we've missed him. (He's John Rocker's buddy, after all.) Anyway, this is a relatively minor key for him, but we've been so forlorn without him that we're including it, regardless: Irvin has been accused of assaulting a contractor....
Look At All The Dumb Athletes!
Every year, as the NFL Draft approaches, the results of each player's Wunderlic scores inevitably leak out. This appears to serve only one purpose: To allow us to mock athletes for being so stupid. This is, we believe, a perfectly healthy aspect of being a sports fan; we are so cognizant of our phys...
Another Way To Assure Your Child A Life Of Misery
In an example of creative nomenclature that could only have come from Ohio, a couple has named their child "Tressel Hayes Huffines."...
A Slight Departure From Billy Packer
With the NCAA tournament gone, and CBS putting Billy Packer back in his cryogenic chamber for 11 months, I thought we were entitled to some commentators with more of a sense of joy....
Devin Hester Is Virtually Fast
If you're like us — and Lord help you if you are — much of the summer is spent counting down the days until the new version of Madden is released. (This year, the Buzzsaw is gonna be good! Leinart to Boldin ... Buzzsaw!) Even though the NFL Draft still hasn't happened, they've already released some ...
Joe Tiller Has Had It Up To Here With Your HTML
The life of a college football coach is fraught with peril. Boosters are constantly breathing down your neck, players are temperamental and inconsistent and, of course, there's always the possibility that some crazed fellow will end up finding all your cellphone records. But if you're Purdue coach J...
Ever Wonder Who Houston Nutt Talks To? Today's Your Lucky Day!
It hasn't been the best 24-hour stretch for Arkansas football coach Houston Nutt. Turns out, an awfully eager Razorbacks fan sent a request for Nutt's cell phone records through the Freedom Of Information Act and, amazingly, he/she was sent back a full report....
Someone In The Reuters Photo Department Is Having Some Fun
Last week, the Denver Broncos held open auditions for women to join their cheerleading team. Two hundred and fifty women tried out for 34 slots. One of them was this woman....