NFL Page 900 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

I Can't Stop Watching This Psycho Local Ad About Heroin
This advertisement is an attempt to warn viewers of the dangers of heroin, and it aired during the second local break of tonight's Super Bowl broadcast in St. Louis. The Drug War fails again; this ad makes me want heroin really bad right now. Anybody else?...

Jeremy Lane's INT Came At A Cost: This Very Gross Injury
Please take our word for it. Don't click through to the rest of this post. You really don't want to....

Report: "Ball Boy" Who Took Footballs Into Bathroom Is An Elderly Man
The investigation into how numerous footballs used by the Patriots became deflated during the AFC Championship Game has focused on the Patriots-employed ball boy that took the balls from the referees locker room to the field. In-between he stopped off in what was at first ominously reported as "an...

Roger Goodell Refuses To Answer NBC's Questions
Roger Goodell threatened to fine Marshawn Lynch $500,000 if he didn't answer media questions this week. Let's all be surprised, then, that King Hypocrite refused NBC's request he answer their questions on-camera....

Puppy Bowl, Fish Bowl, Kitten Bowl: Counterprogramming The Super Bowl
The over/under for the number of households that will tune in to watch the Super Bowl tonight is 113 million. There has never been a larger event in the history of television. What I'm saying here is you don't have to be a fan of football to tune in. People who don't watch this Super Bowl will spend...

The Porn Movies You Could Be Watching Instead Of The Super Bowl
Most networks don't even bother attempting to program against the Super Bowl. But every channel has to air something, including your local cable provider's porn channels. Here's are the titles of porn movies airing on Time Warner Cable opposite the Super Bowl, according to today's TV Guide:...

Do The NFL's Anti-Domestic Violence Initiatives Actually Even Exist?
As long ago as it now seems, it was only this past July when Roger Goodell decided to suspend Ray Rice for two games after the Baltimore Ravens running back cold-cocked his future wife in an Atlantic City casino elevator. There was outrage, but not enough to change the NFL commissioner's mind. He ...

Marshawn Lynch's Outtakes From Gaming With Gronk Are Also Very Funny
Marshawn Lynch and Gronk played some video games on Conan's show the other day and it was great. Attempting to satiate an insatiable demand for all things Marshawn Lynch, Team Coco has uploaded a video of outtakes from the shoot, appropriately calling it "Marshawnisms." What's a Marshawnism? Probabl...

44 Lies Roger Goodell Told In His Press Conference Today
"It has been a season of amazing competition, challenges and real progress."...

How Will The Seahawks' Secondary Deal With Rob Gronkowski?
Richard Sherman might be the most vocal player in Seattle's hard-hitting, receiver-eating secondary known as the Legion of Boom, but he's far from the only key contributor. In fact, depending on his elbow's condition, Sherman might not even play a major part in the Hawks' gameplan. ...

J.J. Watt Has Retreated To A Cabin In The Woods To Become More Badass
Last year, Texans defensive end J.J. Watt spent his offseason crashing at his college buddy's house and basically doing nothing but working out. This year, Watt has decided that he needs to step his training up a bit, and so he's purchased a secluded cabin in the woods, where he will live and train ...

This Year's Super Bowl Teams Really Are The Best In Their Conference
Hey, here's a change. The participants in this year's Super Bowl, through the NFL's single-elimination playoff format, were actually the best in their respective conferences this year. That never happens! Except, uhm, when it happened last year. But otherwise—that almost never happens!...

9/11 Truthers Love Pete Carroll
Seahawks head coach Pete Carroll, a bold truth seeker who isn't afraid to ask the difficult questions about what really happened on Sept. 11, 2001, has become a bit of a hero to those in the 9/11 truther movement....

Super Bowl Footballs Will Receive Extra Security
Remember, if you can, back a whole three days ago, before Marshawn Lynch conquered America: it's tough to believe now, but there used to be a big scandal about deflated footballs or something. (It's hard to recall the specifics.) The NFL is taking no chances on a repeat of the controversy. Nobody is...


The Patriots' Super Bowl Success Relies On The Brady-Gronk Connection
Since Randy Moss got the Jazzy Jeff toss from the New England in the middle of the 2010 season, Patriots fans have spent offseason after offseason squawking about the team's need for a deep-threat receiver. Those people are idiots. The current Patriots do not need a deep threat, because Tom Brady su...

Watch The Deadspin Super Bowl Ad That Was Too Hot For TV! (NSFW!)
You know the drill by now: Some dipshit company like GoDaddy or Carl's Jr. makes a lascivious Super Bowl ad, only to be bombarded with a host of last-second edits from the prudes in your average network's S&P department. And then they go ahead and post the uncut ad—highly NSFW (OOH!), like the one a...

You Can Tell College Gronk's Cool Because He's Wearing Sunglasses
Here we see human Spuds MacKenzie Rob Gronkowski in his natural state at the University of Arizona: No shirt, sunglasses, and a big dumb smirk. You can hear the 311 playing through your screen....

NFLPA Response: With These Benevolent Owners, Who Needs A Union?
After our editorial urging NFL players to form a union ran yesterday, we received the below reply from NFLPA Assistant Executive Director of External Affairs George Atallah....