Golf Page 132 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Guy Is Trying To Steal John Daly's Bit
And no, I'm not referring to Udorn Duangdecha getting his stomach stapled and surviving solely on Diet Coke and cigarettes - check out those slacks. Crap, they're so loud that Marlee Matlin heard him trying them on. [Devil Ball Golf]...
Terrible Golfer Banned For Using Drugs To Enhance His Terrible Performance
Doug Barron, a 40-year-old veteran with zero PGA Tour wins, is the first golfer to be suspended under the tour's anti-doping policy. Now he will no longer terrorize the professional ranks with his massive 270-yard drives....
Staying Out Late, Sweating Make Anthony Kim A "Loose Cannon"
Anthony Kim was a key player in the U.S.'s President's Cup win this weekend, despite the fact that he didn't sleep much and doesn't really want to hang with Jim Fuyrk. The man is out of control!...
South Carolina Golfer Loses Arm To Angry Alligator
A 70-year-old tries to retrieve his ball from the drink, but a 10-foot alligator decided he'd rather pull the guy into the water and chew on him awhile. They should make a hilarious movie about that! [Fanhouse/ESPN/OurKitchenSink]...
Tiger Woods Owns The Biggest House On The Rich Side Of Town
If Forbes' calculations are correct, Tiger Woods' $10 million FedEx Cup victory pushes him over the one billion dollar mark in career earnings. And he's only 33! How is your 401k doing? [Forbes]...
First, The Met Open Championship. Next, The World!
Andrew Giuliani just won his first professional golf tournament. Yippy! Let's take the Post's advice: "Do you know someone who has made New York a better place? Nominate your hero for the 8th Annual New York Post Liberty Medals." [NYP]...
Watch Out For Your Tires
Who said nothing was going on this weekend? There is live golf right now, and it's on television! They might even show the parking lot, where Y.E. Woods and Tiger Yang have adjacent spots. Awkward. [Star-Ledger]...
Come For The Golf, Be Overcome By The Noxious Fumes
There's a good reason that Liberty National is the most expensive golf course ever built (and the most expensive to join.) It covers up a toxic waste dump! The radioactive sludge makes night golf so much easier! [Forbes]...
What A $500,000 Country Club Membership Buys You
A look inside Liberty National Golf Club, site of this week's PGA event, where members pay a $500,000 initiation fee plus $25,000 yearly dues to eat lunch in New Jersey. Ahh, that sweet-smelling Jersey breeze! [Star-Ledger]...
Bad Golf-As-Sex Metaphors Will Get You Fired
Which do you think this government official really got fired for: showing his peen to a golf course employee, or coming up with a truly awful one-liner?...
Tiger Woods: Golf's Newest Choke Artist
Someone actually had the nerve to ask Tiger Woods—on Saturday—if he'd ever come close to choking in a major. 14 for 14 when leading the final round. So congratulations, anonymous jinxer. You won the weekend....
No Sense Waiting Til Tomorrow To Start Engraving The Wanamaker Trophy
Consider this your official PGA Championship open thread. Is it too early to declare this Tiger's two-day victory lap? After Federer's and Nadal's early exits yesterday, we need confirmation that gods still walk among us. [PGA]...
Golfers To Trade Cash For Gold
The IOC is planning to include golf and rugby in the 2016 Olympics. Finally! All of the world's best golfers can compete against each other in one event, just like every single weekend of the year. [MSNBC]...
Rich People Golf While You're At Work
The PGA Championship is under way. Follow along with the online leaderboard and it's almost like being outside! (Your cubicle has never felt so small and dark.) [PGA.com/ShaneBacon]...
Tiger Woods, David Feherty's Soiled Underpants, And You
The PGA gas scandal has taught us a lot about ourselves and about humanity in general, but there is one deeper unexplored question: Why is this the first we're learning about Tiger Woods' obsession with farts?...
Fart-Gate Scandal Blown Wide Open
After what seems like decades of secrecy and lies, America demands to know: Who cut the cheese? Now we may finally have our answer. The conspiracy goes far deeper than any of us could have imagined....and it really stinks....
The Buick Open Was HQ For Grand Theft: Golf Cart
Suburban Michigan: not known for its public transportation. If you're a teenager without a car who biked all the way to the Buick Open, you're probably in no mood to pedal all the way home. Solution: steal a golf cart!...
Golf Course Hunting Gives New Meaning To Notching A Birdie
A golf course in northern Indiana has a geese problem. Specifically, there's too many of them, honking and crapping everywhere. The city council's solution? Golfers with guns....
Golfer Wins First LPGA Event, Honor Of Being Molested By Frenchmen
Congratulations to Evian Masters winner Ai Miyazato, whose reward is this unsettling photographic commentary on the French libido, golf's patriarchy, modern Orientalism and the staggering inability of women's golf to devise a trophy that doesn't seem vaguely cocklike....
Canadian Open Features Nothing But Holes-In-One
Here is Leif Olson making both the greatest golf shot ever and the greatest billiards shot ever at the same time. Of course, when three others have already aced the same hole, you gotta step it up a notch....