Hey, Some People Think Better In There

The world of chess has been brought to its knees. Controversy has gripped the sport, and play has been suspended in the World Championships. ChessBase.com says "the World Championship and FIDE is in its deepest crisis ever." Why? Because Vladimir Kramnik can't drag himself away from the shitter.

Kramnik is facing Veselin Topalov in the Reunification World Championship. It seems that Kramnik was spending an unusual amount of of time in his private bathroom (the only place where players can go during matches that isn't under constant video surveillance), and Topalov filed a protest, accusing Kramnik of somehow cheating in there. The protest was upheld, it was ruled that both players had to use a common bathroom, and now, everyone's upset. Kramnik sat down on the floor outside of his private bathroom, and refused to participate until it was unlocked.

In summary, the most exciting thing to ever happen in Chess revolves around a grown man sitting on the floor outside of his bathroom and pouting.

Toplolov, in addition to the protest, also announced that if the match does continue, that he will not be taking part in joint press conferences with Kramnik, and he won't be shaking his hand. Regardless of anything else that happens, not shaking his hand is probably a good idea.

Bathroom Dispute Halts Chess Championship [New York Times] Elista 2006: World Championship Crisis [ChessBase]