Ice Dancing With The Goons

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For reasons not yet explained by science, Dancing With The Stars is a phenomenal television success. But what if you added the possibility of dangerous neck slashings and more black eyes? Wouldn't you watch that even harder?

Well, it helps if you're Canadian, because then you can watch that happen on the new figure skating reality show Battle of the Blades. Yes, Fox tried this years ago and it failed miserably, because a) it's Fox and b) the "celebrities" included Dave Coulier and Jillian Barberie. That not exactly the recipe for a ratings juggernaut. But this time the Canucks have paired professional figure skaters with retired professional hockey players. Lifting a 90-pound woman over your head and twirling is a lot like winning the Stanley Cup!

And these aren't just any hockey players—they've rounded up some of the most bloodthirsty thugs they could find, including Tie Domi, Bob Probert and Claude Lemieux. Since most reality shows (and figure skating events) are easily spiced up by fist fights this idea can't miss, right?

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Actually, the premiere did get some sweet ratings and Domi already got clocked in the face once. It's a sensation! Plus, also those people who fell in love with Jamie Sale seven years ago finally have a reason to live again.

Battle of the Blades: faceoff on figure skatesil [Globe and Mail]
Former NHLers treading on strange ice [National Post]
Battle of the Blades [CBC]