Idiot On The Field At Diamondbacks Game Is Tripped, Takes Surprisingly Long Time To Fall

The crack of the bat. The smell of glove leather. Enormous American flags. Cracker Jacks. An idiot on the field, sprinting half-clothed through Arizona’s outfield. Baseball is back!

That idiot showed up in the third inning of tonight’s Rockies-Diamondbacks game, and he managed to stay on his feet for a remarkable amount of time after security guards first made contact with him:

Happy opening day!