Jerry Jones's Bizarre Sexual Assault Lawsuit

Remember Jerry Jones's drunk video, in which he slammed Parcells and Tebow? A woman claims that later that night Jones assaulted her, had her drugged with GHB, and almost gave her a prostitute's STD. Strange stuff in here.

A couple of caveats before we get to the good stuff in the lawsuit, which might discount it as (to use a legal term) complete bullshit. First, Jones already has a restraining order out on the woman, Patricia Gavin. Second, the lawsuit was filed pro se, which means she's choosing to represent herself (crazy alert), or couldn't find a lawyer willing to do it (double crazy alert).

It was at Ocean Prime restaurant in Dallas that Jones was recorded on our famous little video. But later that night, according to Gavin, his drunk turned mean.

[A]s I was exiting the Ladies Room at the back of the restaurant Jerry Jones obstructed my exit and shoved me into the Ladies Room and sexually assaulted me pinning me against the wall and stating "You aren't going anywhere. I planned this when you walked in."

Mr. Jones blocked my exit as I was leaving the Ladies Room and shoved me back in the restroom after I told him "Good Luck with the Superbowl. That is a really big job. I was just leaving. Excuse me". As I attempted to avoid him and step around him he put his hands on my shoulders and drove me back in the Ladies Room and against the wall.

Mr. Jones sexually assaulted me in the Ladies Room and he had an erection when he pressed me against the wall.

Oh, it gets weirder. Gavin claims she had to get tested for STDs because Jones and his son told her they had been with prostitutes earlier in the night. And later, at a meeting with Jones's associates, they drugged her with GHB in an attempt to get her to halt her lawsuit.

So, did any of this happen? Probably not, just like the $3 million she claims was stolen from her purse the night of the assault. But this is America: anyone can file any lawsuit, and anyone can laugh at it.

Jerry Jones Hit With Sexual Assault Suit [D Magazine] Earlier: Slurring Jerry Jones Bad-Mouths Bill Parcells, Tim Tebow