Last Night's Winner: The Team That Won The Stanley Cup, Duh

In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the Chicago Blackhawks and Rocky Wirtz, who needed just three years to undo what Dollar Bill Wirtz spent 40 years screwing up.

It was probably the most awkward Cup-winning goal ever. Patrick Kane, sliding a casual shot from the left wing, under the inexplicably raised blocker of Michael Leighton. The puck disappeared — as it turned out, wedged behind the post — and the Blackhawks had won it all. Only, nobody knew.

"I tried to sell the celebration," Patrick Kane would say afterward. The Hawks jumped around halfheartedly, the arena went quiet with a not unreasonable hope that the goal would be overturned, and the refs huddled for a cursory review. Of course, it was a goal. A championship for Chicago, for the first time since 1961.

Forty-nine years is a long time. Trust me, I know. I'm a Rangers fan, I waited 54 years. (Well, once you factor in my not existing for most of that, plus the not being a sports fan until I was six or so, and I really only waited four years.) But my point is, 49 years is a really long time to wait between championships.

It was good timing too, doing it in six games. Friday is probably the best day of the week for a championship parade, and by Friday night, the country should be in full USA/England mode. And we all know casual viewers only have the attention span for one niche sport at a time.

And they got Marian Hossa a Cup! I think I've figured this out. It's kind of like in The Ring, where they can only shed the curse by passing it along to someone else. It's your problem now, Ville Leino and any team that signs you.