Perhaps you have heard about the big cow.
It made the rounds earlier this week. It was mentioned right here on Deadspin yesterday, and we were not alone in featuring it: The news media wrote about this cow so much that the Washington Post tried to do a debunking. (“The big cow is a lie,” it tweeted. This itself was a lie. Yes, it’s a steer, but “cow” is good enough for the vernacular and, yes, it is indeed big. )
A viral sensation on the internet is obviously going to make it to your local television news, but this one came with some extra baggage in its four stomachs: A herd of cow puns for TV news anchors to milk dry. I compiled some of my favorites in the video above.
Much like with the Conan same-sex marriage video, many of these lines were the same; newsreaders were simply reading off a script provided to the local station by a syndicator or a parent network. But shoutout to Fox 5 San Diego’s Maria Arcega-Dunn. Not only did she localize the story and make a “beefcake” pun, she found a bigger cow right in Southern California. An even bigger cow? Alert the internet content hive.