Sick of seeing his overly-manicured facial hair plastered up all over Chicago, the suspected Wrigley Field beer chucker has turned himself in. We'll stay with this story all night if we have to! God, I feel like Nancy Grace.
Chicago Police confirmed to Deadspin that they're questioning the suspect, who called them earlier this afternoon and was picked up by detectives. They're currently questioning him, and won't be releasing his identity until they decide to press charges.
But there will be charges pressed, make no mistake. Especially after the Cubs and Shane Victorino filed an official complaint with the CPD today.
He is conforming well to our stereotypes thus far. He's a 21-year-old from the suburbs (Bartlett, Ill.) — but no word if he was wearing his stunna shades when he turned himself in.
By no means is this good old-fashioned witch hunt over. If you've got any info, you know where to send it.
UPDATE: Hello, Johnny Macchione, student at
SIU Carbondale something called Loras College.
UPDATE: According to one patron at Haray Caray's, Macchione was in there after fleeing Wrigley, "running his mouth about it." And the fall guy? One of his buddies. Way to shift the blame to a friend, broseph.