Number of Productive Things You’ve Done Today: Zero

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A long lunch, tweeting about fantasy football, copious consumption of Deadspin: You've officially done zero today. Stop being a complete waste of space and drink a vitaminwater zero™, with enough vitamins and taste to make you feel like you're doing something.

Now on a shelf near you, vitaminwater zero™ is a line of delicious beverages containing zero calories per serving. Designed to help you maintain an active lifestyle, the line's seven varieties each come with their own personality.

vitaminwater zero recoup (peach-mandarin flavored + other natural flavors) helps replenish some b vitamins


vitaminwater zero mega-c (grape-raspberry flavored + other natural flavors) contains vitamin c and zinc to help support your healthy immune system

vitaminwater zero go-go (mixed-berry flavored + other natural flavors) with e and b vitamins to help you get to your daily finish line

vitaminwater zero revitalize (green tea flavored + other natural flavors) loads you up with the antioxidant vitamin c to help fight free radicals and several b vitamins to help support your metabolism

vitaminwater zero rise (orange flavored + other natural flavors) formulated with vitamins c, a & e for some morning nutrition.


vitaminwater zero squeezed (lemonade flavored + other natural flavors) with 8 key nutrients from vitamin a to zinc

vitaminwater zero xxx (acai-blueberry-pomegranate flavored + other natural flavors) -sadly, the triple-x here does not indicate all things NSFW, but, rather, totally SFW antioxidants vitamins a & c to help fight free radicals


You want to be really productive today? "Like" vitaminwater zero's Facebook page. It's just another project to contribute to the whole avoiding-doing-any-work thing you've mastered today.