Prince Was An Afro-Rocking, Coach-Hating Schoolboy Basketball Player

This is a picture of Prince. In middle school. In his middle school basketball team’s uniform. Because he was on the team.

Here is Prince’s coach from his high school team—yes, the famous singer; he played basketball in high school; he had a sick handle; and a nice jumper—describing his game and temperament (all this info courtesy of Libor Jany on Twitter):

Here, courtesy of me, is the tracklisting for Prince’s hypothetical basketball album, hopefully coming to you as soon as he finishes making his teammates pancakes:

“Ref Controversy”

“Patty, Talk to Popovich”

“Jack U Up”

“Play on the Suns”

“The Ballad of Tony Parker”

“Starbury and Vaseline”

“If I Was Your Point Guard”

“Gett Off (The Bench)“

“Anotherjumperholenyohead (JR Smith Remix)“

“Sometimes We’re Home In April”

“All The Statheads Love You In New York”

“When Love Cries”

“I Could Never Take the Place of Our Power Forward”

“Big Baby Is A Star”

“Yellow and Purple Reign”

CORRECTION: An earlier version of this post incorrectly identified the picture as Prince in high school; it’s actually from when he was in middle school.