With the Cowboys playing the Titans tonight, former Dallas receiver and current TV loudmouth Michael Irvin was on First Take this morning, and goddamn, was he sweaty. Despite the best efforts of the production crew, he continued to glisten throughout the segment.
No one else at the desk was this shiny, so it probably wasn’t the lighting. Was Irvin wearing too many layers? Was he too worked up by arguing about the Cowboys with Stephen A. Smith? (The professional shouter was also loud but didn’t turn into a puddle.) In the span of six minutes, there were three efforts to stop Irvin from melting: a staffer with a napkin, another napkin, and finally a towel.
Even after the towel, Irvin was quickly damp once again. He was too excited about new receiver Amari Cooper and the future of the team:
I think tonight, right here in Dallas, we see the dawn of a new day, the beginning of a new age, and a time when the Cowboys will rightfully regain and take their proper spot among kings. Do you hear me? Regain and take their proper spot among the kings!
The Dallas Cowboys are 3-4.