Reports: Joe Flacco—That Joe Flacco—Will Soon Be The Highest Paid Player In NFL History

Yep, Joe Flacco. The big-armed oaf. The doofy bridegroom. The guy whose dad said he was "dull" four times in two sentences five days before the Super Bowl. That guy. No, not the plumber who stripped the washers off your sink and left his wrench on your kitchen table—I mean the guy who backed up Tyler Palko at Pitt before transfering to Division I-AA Delaware and immediately leading them to a 5-6 record in the season he turned 21. That Joe Flacco is now likely to become the highest paid player in NFL history. He will, if a report from ESPN, which notes the contract isn't final, holds true, make "an average of $168,908 each day of the regular season for the next six years."

After that tweet went out last night, reports confirmed that the Ravens are talking to Flacco's agent about a contract for 120.6 million over six years. If it happens, the Ravens will have locked up a quarterback with an undeniable record, and with a contract that expires when he's 34, will have him signed well within his window of debatable eliteness. It's a mind-boggling number, but also a justifiable one.

Ravens fans may one day find themselves wondering whether there might have been another tall, unflappable guy with a big arm somewhere in Division I-AA— no one is irreplaceable!—but during the city's post-championship honeymoon/hangover, there probably won't be many complaints. Congratulations, Joe. We fully expect him to let his millions sit in the bank, or under a mattress, forever.