Resourceful Soccer Teen Defends Himself From Angry Opponents By Weaponizing Corner Flag

As they so often do in South American soccer, things turned violent yesterday during a U20 Copa Libertadores match between Independiente del Valle and River Plate. Rather than get whaled on like another South American soccer teen we’ve seen recently, one Independiente player ran over to the corner flag, picked it up, and jabbed it around at his tormentors like a survivor of the zombie apocalypse fending off a pack of undead with a torch:

This kind of ingenuity will serve him well for the duration of his time playing his continent’s unreasonably aggressive version of the beautiful game.