Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

To keep the comments as fresh and outstanding as they've been up to this point, Commenting Guru Rob Iracane will write wrote a bi-weekly Comment Ombudsman column. It runs every other week. This is that week. Mr. Iracane, co-proprietor of the brilliant Walkoff Walk , is also the guy who approveapproved comments around here, and the fellow to whom you shouldshould have address addressed any comment account requests,and he will where he used to explore issues involved in commenting, what makes a great comment thread, what's working, what isn't, answer your questions, so on. So here's this week's column that deals with some major changes that will make you tear out your hair and rend your garments.I began my role of Deadspin commenting intern back in November 2006. Five months later, I started my comment ombudsman column and have found new ways to annoy you fortnightly since then. You've put up with my constant nagging about fantasy teams, Martin Lawrence, and my deep-seated dislike of college football and, for the most part, you listened to me. Deadspin commenters are still the best and funniest commenters in the entire sportsblogosphere, so I don't think my nagging did any permanent damage to your collective reputation. Unfortunately, this will be my final combudsman column. As of today, I am resigning from the office of deadtern and moving on to a world where I can no longer add or delete commenters at a humorous and wildly influential sports blog. Before I leave, I'd like to take this opportunity to beseech the commenters to stop doing something that has stuck in my craw since the day I started. Please, stop commenting when you don't have something funny to say. Seriously, some of you post boring and shitty comments. Stop it. Right now. Be funny, and don't be unfunny. That's the number one rule of Deadspin, and some of you are shitting all over the rule and, thereby, shitting all over Deadspin's reputation. Stop it! Stop being conversational. Stop using the same old hack jokes. Stop being unfunny! Okay, sorry. That wasn't meant for all of you, just the select few who give me the red ass. With that out of the way, I'd like to thank Will Leitch for hiring me and A.J. Daulerio for keeping me on board during the transition of power. I'd also like to salute the three folks who I consider to be the Best Commenters in Deadspin History. In no particular order:

  • Suss—: Long before he became the resident liveblogger, Matt Sussman was a solid master of puns. Oh, who am I kidding? He's still consistently popping out puns in the comment section.
  • Christmas Ape: You know him now as Mike Tunison, but at one point, Christmas Ape was winning comment threads with his hilarity and amassing +1's with regularity. Unfortunately, his comment contributions have dried up a bit of late. Come back to the five-and-dime, Christmas Ape.
  • Camp Tiger Claw: I enjoyed his work so much I started a blog with him. Kris Liakos is a comic genius and his best work will always live on in the comment section of Deadspin.

If 99% of the commenters could be 1% as funny as these three hooligans, I could walk away from this job feeling confident that I did it well. Thanks, everyone, for doing your best and being kind.

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