Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

"Romo's Bitch" Call Sign Irks Naval Aviator

Illustration for article titled "Romo's Bitch" Call Sign Irks Naval Aviator

Here's a pretty amusing story from "After Action: Your Military Sports Report, " where one young aviator becomes saddled with the call sign "Romo's Bitch" due to his Cowboy fandom. He is not amused.


Ensign Steve Crowston filed a complaint with the naval inspector's office thanks to some of the other suggested call-signs his squadron suggested for him ("Fagmeister" and "Gay Boy"), stating the bawdy nicknames were "workplace harassment." "Romo's Bitch" was chosen, which, limits his purported homosexual tendencies to the Cowboys quarterback. Regardless, Crowston's pissed:

"I was like, wait a minute? What the hell? You think I'm gay? What a way to tell me that," said Crowston, a limited duty officer who was previously a chief.

Let's hope there's a Top Gun remake in the works right now. The dialogue becomes so much more snappier when you replace "Maverick" with "Romo's Bitch:"

Stinger: Romo's Bitch you just did an incredibly brave thing. What you should have done was land your plane! You don't own that plane, the tax payers do! Son, your ego is writing checks your body can't cash. You've been busted, you lost your qualifications as section leader three times, put in hack twice by me, with a history of high speed passes over five air control towers, and one admiral's son!

Goose: It's the bottom of the 9th, the score is tied. It's time for the big one.
Iceman: You up for this one, Romo's Bitch?
Romo's Bitch: Just a walk in the park, Kazansky.

Romo's Bitch: Jesus Christ, and you think I'm reckless? When I fly, I'll have you know that my crew and my plane come first.
Charlie: Well, I am going to finish my sentence, Lieutenant. My review of your flight performance was right on.
Romo's Bitch: Is that right?
Charlie: That is right, but I held something back. I see some real genius in your flying, Romo's Bitch, but I can't say that in there. I was afraid that everyone in the tax trailer would see right through me, and I just don't want anyone to know that I've fallen for you.

Much better.