Soccer Page 146 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Icarus can kiss my ass
Perhaps there’s no bigger showcase of Lucy yanking the football away than Liverpool chasing The Quadruple. Because as it got closer, it only became harder and only felt further away. Which sounds stupid, because no team has gotten closer. But fatigue was clear for the last few weeks, and the more ma...
Real Madrid shouldn’t have even been there
We’ll likely never see a UEFA Champions League run like the one Real Madrid just completed. If only quality of play decided Los Blancos’ quarterfinal and semifinal two legged-ties, as well as Saturday’s one-game final against Liverpool, they would’ve lost each one. Real Madrid trailed late in each s...
Real Madrid have more than just black magic against Liverpool
While four years is a long time in soccer, and teams can greatly transform a couple times in that timespan, Real Madrid and Liverpool look a lot like they did four years ago. Liverpool are still anchored by Virgil van Dijk, Trent Alexander-Arnold, and Andrew Robertson in defense and Sadio Mane and M...
Kylian Mbappé is PSG’s only hope
Let’s be fair, it isn’t much of a sacrifice or even a hard choice to make more money than a lot of countries’ GDP and live in Paris. It’s a pretty sweet deal, and something 95 percent of the world would opt for (with the other five percent either already living there, making millions somewhere bette...
You can’t stop the Manchester City boulder
If there are any Mavericks/Liverpool fans out there, our heart goes out to you (though the Mavs have been nearly untouchable at home, so there may still be some salvation for them). Both of those teams were or are being asked to stand in front of a bus with no brakes and tasked with getting it to st...
USWNT finally gets paid
Today is the first day that the US men and the US women’s soccer teams will earn the same wages for performance on the field. The US women’s team has won four World Cup gold medals and four Olympic medals. In 1930, the US men had their best result in World Cup play, finishing third. ...
Messi to MLS could be a reality
For most of his career, it was impossible to picture Lionel Messi in any other jersey than the blue and maroon of Barcelona. Nine months into his stay with Paris Saint-Germain, transfer talk for one of the best to ever lace up a pair of boots is surfacing once more, with a report coming out on Tuesd...
Miles Robinson’s injury leaves USMNT in a bind
The conversation can’t be delayed. Procrastinating about specific personnel decisions that will expose Gregg Berhalter’s future at the helm of the United States men’s national team are now harmful to delay after this weekend. Miles Robinson went from World Cup lock to out of the 23-man roster being ...
FIFA forgoing $150 million annually to pursue delusions of grandeur
Like people who are addicted to Coca-Cola products, gamers can spot a knockoff within the first three seconds of tasting one. Try giving a Coke lover a Pepsi, and they get offended. A waiter responding to a request for a Coke with, “We only have Pepsi. Is that OK?” is met with a laugh more often tha...
Marcelo booted from Lyon locker room for excessive farts, laughter
Brazilian soccer player Marcelo couldn’t stop busting ass in the Lyon locker room and laughing about it. His flatulence became too much for his teammates to handle, as ESPN reported his farting and cackling about crackin’ a rat was the reason behind Marcelo’s expulsion from Lyon last August....
It comes down to minute levels of control
The Premier League title chase took a massive turn this weekend. Liverpool dropped points at home to Tottenham, drawing 1-1 on Saturday afternoon. Buoyed by watching that, and in the wake of trying to recover from their Champions League collapse, Manchester City rubbed Newcastle’s ass in the moonshi...
Chelsea FC changes hands for a cool $3.1 billion
After months of negotiations to have Chelsea FC land in different ownership and away from the leadership of Russian billionaire Roman Abramovich, the Blues will be sold to a group led by Los Angeles Dodgers part-owner Todd Boehly, who was at Stamford Bridge on Saturday to watch his new team tie Wolv...
Christian Pulisic’s dad is every U.S. soccer fan right now
Christian Pulisic is the closest thing to he who was promised for American soccer fans who have been pining for a legitimate star. I’m not sure what’s the equivalent to being brought onto Chelsea after a successful start to a career at Dortmund, but the closest approximation I can think of is going ...
How do you plan for devil magic?
So Pep Guardiola has to eat shit again. I’ll pause if that sentence makes you giggle (I know I am). Once again, armed with probably the most stacked team in Europe — as he was in Munich, and as he has been in Manchester — and armed with the most cohesive team in Europe, and probably the best team in...
You can only throw everything at Liverpool for so long
I guess it confirms me as an irretrievable Malorkus, but after watching Liverpool simply outlast Villareal in yesterday’s second leg of the Champions League semifinal, all I wanted to do was go back in time and show the game to the writers of Game Of Thrones. And to give them a demonstration of what...
Atlético Madrid are being delightfully bitchy
There are some traditions in sports that, while aesthetically pleasing, aren’t really enjoyed by the players all that much. The handshake line in the NHL playoffs comes to mind. While we enjoy what we think of as the ultimate act of sportsmanship, talk to a lot of players privately and they’d tell y...
Jesse Marsch and Leeds might be in serious trouble
It’s hard to judge just how important it is that an American manager finally “makes it” in Europe. It would certainly be cool, but for what it means for men’s American soccer overall trails by miles to how players make it in the world’s best leagues. The US needs a load of players making a fist of i...
Madrid have the most annoying way to win an argument
That isn’t to say that Madrid won last night, because they most certainly didn’t. 4-3 results when you have the three is a loss in the scorebook. And it’s that kind of biting analysis that keeps you coming back. But Madrid “won” in that a one-goal deficit when the second leg is at home, where white-...
We’re always here for a good piss-taking
Frank Lampard may not have any idea what he’s doing as a manager, or he may be saddled with just the biggest collection of mishmashed parts that don’t fit, but he is aware of history. It was eight years ago, almost to the day, that Lampard’s Chelsea showed up to Anfield to stifle a title-chasing Liv...