Soccer Page 257 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
I Can't Stop Watching These Two Soccer Dummies Flop At The Same Time
Never has an eskimo kiss caused so much imaginary pain....
Swansea Lose 3-2 To Arsenal In Bob Bradley's First Game In Charge
Swansea lost 3-2 to Arsenal this morning in Bob Bradley’s first game in charge, twice coming back from a two-goal deficit but ultimately failing to win any points. In that respect, it was a quite similar to Franceso Guidolin’s final two games in charge of the Swans, when he presided over a 3-1 defea...
Norwegian Soccer Commentators Shocked And Horrified By San Marino Equalizer
The unabashed homers on Norwegian TV reasonably expected a comfortable win against little ol’ San Marino in Norway’s World Cup qualifier on Tuesday. Instead of getting to channel their inner Elated Tiziano Crudeli, they were forced into Distraught Tiziano Crudeli mode when San Marino tied the game a...
Two Soccer Guys Take Showboating To Whole New Level By Dabbing In Middle Of Game
The post-goal dab celebration is nearly ubiquitous on soccer pitches the world over. Langelihle Ndlovu and Pule Mmodi, members of the Free State Stars’ reserve team in South Africa, took it up a notch by each deciding to hit the dab during open play, an in-your-face effrontery that even Neymar would...
Amateur Soccer Man Secures His Spot In Heaven With This Majestic Goal
“It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle,” Jesus Christ once remarked, “than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.” He continued, “But if a soccer man doth line up and crack a sweet shot on goal, and find himself denied by the crossbar, yet resist the weapons of Lucifer as d...
Everton's Oumar Niasse Is The Saddest Man In The Premier League
Oumar Niasse thought all his dreams had come true. After spending the first half of the 2015-16 season crushing it in Russia (12 goals and eight assists in 21 domestic league and European games), the Senegalese striker earned a lucrative move to the land of the TV money and the home of the enormous ...
Western New York Win NWSL Championship In A Shootout After Stoppage Time Equalizer
The Western New York Flash defeated the Washington Spirit in a shootout to win the NWSL title. The Spirit took the lead early into extra time, with Crystal Dunn scoring in the 92nd minute, her second of the night. But Western New York’s Lynn Williams headed in a Jessica McDonald cross four minutes i...
Do Not Watch The Second Half Of This Terrible USMNT-Cuba Game
I know that it’s the very end of the work day at the very end of the work week, and there are only so many options available to distract you during these final interminable minutes before the weekend’s sweet release from responsibility, but I cannot in good faith advise you to spend even a minute of...
Iceland Channel The Power Of Odin, Complete Wild Stoppage-Time Comeback
The mighty Iceland national team trailed Finland by a goal as today’s World Cup qualifying match rolled into stoppage time. Clearly imbued with the power of the Norse gods, they turned it all the way around and left with a 3-2 win....
![Soccer Player Gets His Finger All Gnarled To Hell In Freak Accident [WARNING: GRAPHIC]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/yyo61hj1rubvhh9vu2we.jpg)
Soccer Player Gets His Finger All Gnarled To Hell In Freak Accident [WARNING: GRAPHIC]
This is a story of love, of toughness, and a horribly, disgustingly mangled finger. Proceed at your own caution....
Ghanaian Coach Believes Country Is Failing At Soccer Because Players Fuck Too Much
Former Ghana international-turned-manager, Malik Jabir, is not happy with the state of Ghanaian soccer. To his mind, the players are not realizing their potential though a lack of commitment to the game. And he thinks he knows why, too: players are too tempted by all the sexy Ghanaian women and wind...
Women's Soccer Team Forced To Train With Two Idiot Sexists
A women’s soccer team in the Czech Republic is being forced to train with two sexists from the men’s team after the men made comments about a female referee belonging in the kitchen....
Venezuelan Soccer Teen Scores Last-Minute Game Winner From The Center Circle
Venezuelan youth international and Florida State student Deyna Castellanos is really good at kicking the ball. She proved as much during an U-17 World Cup match against Cameroon, when she scored a game-winner deep into stoppage time, immediately off of the kick-off following Cameroon’s equalizer:...
Tiny Soccer Child Already Good Enough To Play Against Big Soccer Boys
I want you to look at this picture of 13-year-old Ivorian-Scot baby, Karamoko Dembélé, as he sits taking in a Celtic U-20 game:...
I Can't Stop Watching Luisão Completely Disrupt This Wall<em></em><em></em>
Top of the table Benfica routed Feirense 4-0 yesterday, with the final goal coming on a stoppage time free kick by Alejandro Grimaldo. As shown on TV, there was some pre-free kick shenanigans, but nothing too special....
Bob Bradley Named Swansea City's New Manager
Bob Bradley has been appointed Swansea City’s manager, becoming the first American to helm a Premier League club. He replaces Francesco Guidolin....
Harry Redknapp Wonders "Who Gives A Shit?" About His Players Betting On Matches<em></em><em></em>
The Telegraph continues publishing the results of their investigation into corruption in soccer—which has already resulted in England manager Sam Allardyce losing his job—this time taking a detour into gambling. ...
UEFA Fines Celtic Over Fans Flying The Palestinian Flag
A large group of Celtic fans waved Palestinian flags before a Champions League preliminary game against Israeli club Hapoel Be’er Shevae last month. This morning, UEFA announced that they would be fining the club €10,000 for the protest because it violated a UEFA rule regarding the use of political ...
Liverpool Are Finally Back
Liverpool haven’t won the league title since before the Premier League even existed, and for the last seven years or so they’ve barely even competed for the top four. The club was one day away from bankruptcy before being saved, a Steven Gerrard slip from winning the title, had one of the five best ...
Mario Balotelli Watches His Goal From His Butt<em></em>
Rejoice, soccer lovers, for the joy of Mario Balotelli scoring goals is once again a regular part of our lives. The on-fire Nice forward added another one today in the Europa League, cracking this ball with a little jump-slide shot and admiring it as it flies into the net from his backside:...