Soccer Page 265 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Clint Dempsey Bends Long-Range Free Kick Perfectly Into The Top Corner
Clint Dempsey opened the scoring in Tuesday’s CONCACAF Champions League quarterfinal between the Seattle Sounders and Mexico’s Club América with this prodigious free kick:...

The FIFA Election Is Already Very Silly
FIFA will hold its presidential election to replace Sepp Blatter on Friday. Well, Friday unless candidate Prince Ali Bin al-Hussein gets his way. Prince Ali has gone to the international Court of Arbitration for Sport in an attempt to postpone the election because he wants transparency. And transpar...

Shut Up, We Can Do This
Last night was the draw for the Copa America Centenario, this summer’s tournament bringing together the best of North and South America, and as hosts, the U.S. had reason to hope for a favorable draw. It really could not have gone much worse. ...

Silvio Berlusconi, Who Somehow Still Owns A.C. Milan, Said Some Racist Shit About Mario Balotelli
Silvio Berlusconi, bunga bunga party alumnus and the only crustacean to serve as prime minister of Italy, has been convicted of paying for sex with an underaged prostitute and tax fraud, and he’s been accused of a truly expansive list of other crimes. Berlusconi was buddies with Muammar Gaddafi, is ...

Volkswagen-Sponsored Wolfsburg Fine Nicklas Bendtner For Posting A Photo Of Himself With A Benz
Nicklas Bendtner has always been, let’s say, a vibrant character. A few years ago, he whipped his dick out and tried to hump a taxi, UEFA fined for wearing the wrong underwear, and he’s been arrested for trying to kick down a door in his own apartment building because he wanted to go swimming. Bendt...

PSV Defender Promises To Eat Atlético Madrid Like His Soup, Which He Then Burns His Mouth On
PSV will play host to Atlético Madrid and the best defense in Europe next week, but new PSV defender Nicolas Isimat-Marin ain’t scared. He declared in a video interview with the team’s YouTube page that he was going to eat Los Rojiblancos like soup....

Manchester United Are Toast
With a third of the Premier League season left, Manchester United find themselves in fifth place, six points behind Manchester City and the all-important fourth Champions League spot. It’s not impossible for United to pass City, but given their inconsistency this season it’s unlikely....

Shaq Is The Ultimate Soccer Hipster
You can’t swing a dead cat in Brooklyn without hitting an Arsenal-scarf-wearing, artisanal-coffee-in-a-mason-jar-sipping soccer fan, and you don’t even have to look too far these days to find Swansea City, Sunderland, and Fulham fans in the U.S....

The Only Constant In The EPL Title Race Is Chaos
The Premier League season is a brutally long slog through 38 games from August to May, where teams must balance ambitions on as many as four fronts, while managing health and keeping everyone happy. It’s about not breaking down as much as it is about throttling every opponent. So it’s easy to lose t...

Ankles Aren't Supposed To Bend This Way
Atletico Madrid’s feisty winger Yannick Carrasco left his team’s game at Getafe with this twisted ankle. After falling to the floor in pain, Carrasco tried to get helped to the tunnel, but he was eventually carried off the pitch....

PSG Player Posts Slur-Laden Video, Gets Himself Suspended
As Ivorian international Serge Aurier found out this week, hosting a smoked-out Periscope session where you call your boss and teammates a bunch of homophobic slurs isn’t exactly a good PR move. The Paris Saint-Germain right back is in some hot water for the following video, wherein he says some rat...

China Has Passed MLS As The Place For Old Stars To Cash Out
Depending on which reports you believe, Chinese Super League clubs are in the tank for Oscar, Arda Turan, Marouane Fellaini, Juan Mata, Lionel Messi, Wayne Rooney, and Ronaldo. As the league’s recent hiring spree shows, they have more money than they know what to do with, and when they wave the kind...

An Injured Chicharito Is Truthering Bundesliga Highlights
Javier Hernández is tearing up the Bundesliga in his first campaign with Bayer Leverkusen. The Mexican striker is fourth in the league with 13 goals, and first among non-Dortmund/Bayern players. Unfortunately, he’s now going to miss a few weeks after he tore a muscle in his ass (or his Gesäßmuskel, ...

The Melbourne Derby Was Wild As Hell
Early reports out of Australia have last night’s/this morning’s Melbourne Derby down as one of the greatest ever meetings between Melbourne City and Melbourne Victory, and the tape backs that up, inasmuch as it’s the only A-League I’ve ever watched, and there were some good highlights....

Holy Shit, Christen Press's First Touch Will Make Your Knees Buckle
Oh my god look at this first touch from Christen Press. She doesn’t just expertly control a cross whipped into her, but no-look uses the outside of her foot (her heel?!) to gently drop the ball just a few feet in beside her to wheel around and smash home. It should be illegal to be this skilled and ...

Columbus Crew Unveil New Kit, And...Hmmm.
Just look how thrilled they all are!...

USWNT Players Association Files Withering Response To U.S. Soccer Lawsuit
U.S. Soccer’s lawsuit against the U.S. Women’s National Team Players Association seeks to answer a seemingly simple question: Do the two organizations have a valid collective bargaining agreement, or not?...

Liverpool Fans Leave Anfield In Protest, Liverpool Joins Them By Immediately Giving Up A Pair Of Goals
Liverpool fans planned and executed a 77th minute walkout from today’s game against Sunderland to protest ticket prices getting increases up to £77, and apparently, their team decided to join them in protest, so they laid down and let Sunderland of all teams roar back and tie them 2-2....

Uh, Can Anyone Catch Leicester City?
For the entirety of this EPL season, it’s never been a question if a big club could catch Leicester City and retake the Premier League lead, but which big club would. Eventually, the thinking went, this plucky group of upstarts would turn back into a pumpkin and they’d be eclipsed by the inevitable ...

U.S. Women's National Team Sued By U.S. Soccer Federation
The United States Soccer Federation sued the union representing Women’s National Team members in federal court Wednesday, an action sure to further fray the already strained bond between the two groups....