Soccer Page 293 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

MLS Is Still Pissed Off At Jürgen Klinsmann
It was obvious at the time that MLS commissioner Don Garber's tirade against Jürgen Klinsmann last month was about much more than the innocuous statements they were ostensibly in response to. Sure enough, ESPN FC is reporting that MLS bigwigs remain "irate" at Klinsmann—this time for what they see a...

Chelsea And Spain Are Locked In A Dumb War Neither Can Win
Even by the standards of dick-measuring contests, the one ongoing between Chelsea and the Spanish national team has been awful for months. At some point, though, this sort of thing stops being merely dumb and threatens to become actually harmful to the players each side should be trying to protect—a...

New York FC's New Kits Look Like Hand-Me-Down Manchester City Ones
A league of hand-me-down players wearing hand-me-down jerseys? Sounds about right....

How To Dumbfound Two Defenders With One Dribble, By Brazil's Willian
You see this little move right here, where Willian drags the ball one way with the outside of his boot, before that lightning-quick flick of the foot in the other direction, nudging the ball in the opposite direction of where he was moving while completely freezing the two Turkish defenders? Yeah,...

Spoiler Alert: After FIFA Probe, Qatar Gets To Keep Its World Cup
The summary of a year-long investigation into the bidding process for the next two World Cups will not be released until tomorrow, but the gist has already leaked via the English press. Basically: everyone involved was corrupt, but the 2018 and 2022 tournaments will not be taken away from Russia or ...

15-Year-Old Wonderkid Added To Video Game After Dad's Tweeted Permission
The real point of career modes in soccer video games is to snatch up a grip of the world's most hyped youngsters and slowly build a juggernaut. Fans of Football Manager—that impossibly detailed, life-consumingly fun computer game—were dismayed to find Norway's new starlet Martin Ødegaard missing...

FC Zurich Initiates Legal Proceedings Over Horror Tackle
If you're the squeamish sort, I highly suggest you do not watch the above video. It shows a barbaric tackle from this weekend's Swiss Super League action, involving FC Arau's Sandro Wieser and FC Zurich's Gilles Yapi Yalo. Wieser launches his cleat into Yapi Yalo's knee, causing "torn anterior and...

Is This An Everton Fan Wiping His Booger On A Lady's Head?
We don't want to believe that this is what actually happened, but it has to be, right? Here's the Vine:...

Qatar Sports Minister Says He <em>Probably</em> Won't Imprison Gay Soccer Fans
It's hard to keep track of all the reasons it's so fucked up that FIFA decided to award the 2022 World Cup to Qatar, so here's one you might not have been aware of: It is illegal to be gay in Qatar, and the country's sports minister isn't willing to give anyone a straight answer on whether gay peopl...

Keeper Gets Medical OK One Day After Spinning In Air, Landing On Head
Yesterday, Villarreal goalkeeper Sergio Asenjo took an ugly tumble, cartwheeling through the air after leaping for a ball and landing flush on his neck. Despite feeling "dizzy" and "groggy," Asenjo continued playing. Despite not remembering the incident, he's already been cleared to play again....

Suit: Seattle Arena Soccer Team Owner Sexually Preys On Cheerleaders
You've probably never heard of Dion Earl, the former college and pro soccer player who is the owner, coach, and star player of the Seattle Impact, a professional soccer team that began its first season in the Major Arena Soccer League last night. He is, though, according to a lawsuit filed against...

Chelsea Have Already Made A Joke Of The Premier League Title Chase
So, you guys are really just gonna let this happen, huh? Just sit idly by, dropping points all willy nilly, while Mourinho's men sashay to the title without breaking a sweat? And the only club trying to put up a fight is Southampton?...

German Player's Perfect Strike From Center Circle Makes Great Own Goal
It takes a special kind of calmness to lob a ball from the edge of the center circle with enough accuracy to find the back of the net. Unfortunately, Christoph Kramer so calmly played this pass because he expected it to find his own keeper, not sail over his teammate's head and into the goal....

Man Utd Legend Asks City Fan Noel Gallagher To Sign Guitar, Gets Trolled
C'mon, Gary Neville, did you really think asking Noel Gallagher—who at this point is practically as famous for being a Manchester City superfan as he is for being a member of Oasis—to autograph your guitar would end in any other way than this troll job?...

Errant Yaya Touré Shot Drills Little Girl In The Face
This is what happens when your shots aren't on target, Yaya. You bash a little girl in the face. Aim better!...

Here Are All 71 Of Lionel Messi's Champions League Goals
Stop us if this sounds familiar: Lionel Messi played soccer the other day, dragging Barcelona to victory with two crucial goals and winning him yet another goalscoring record, this time as the Champions League's joint all-time scorer. The video above shows each one of his 71 goals, from the first ...

Report: Qatar Using North Korean Slave Labor To Build For World Cup
It seemed like we had reached a point where the organizers of the 2022 World Cup couldn't possibly get more cartoonishly evil, what with the ITUC estimating that migrant worker-fueled construction would kill more people than 9/11, and then another report estimating that 1,000 migrant workers had alr...

Dozens Of Seagulls Straight Chillin' On The Pitch At Aussie Soccer Match
These are the highlights of Melbourne Victory's 2-0 win over Wellington Phoenix. More impressive than either goal scored is that the match continued on in the middle of a veritable bird storm, with dozens of gulls just walking on or flitting about the field and players like they owned the place....

The Brits Are Tearing Shit Up In Madrid
It's comforting to know Americans aren't the only ones known for loud and obnoxious behavior when abroad. Our cousins over in England are similarly famous for heading over to mainland Europe and bringing the ruckus. Hence these British fans in Madrid ahead of today's Liverpool-Real Madrid match, and...
