Soccer Page 344 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Newcastle's First Goal On The Season Was This Curling Strike From Demba Ba
Demba Ba was slow to start his 2011-2012 campaign and then disappeared entirely from Newcastle United's scoresheet after the month of February. It deprived us glorious goals like this one he scored against Manchester United in February....

After 75 Years And 25 Matches, The U.S. Men's Soccer Team Finally Wins In Mexico
No one really expected much from the USMNT tonight in a friendly at Estadio Azteca against Olympic gold medal-winning Mexico (and its super-creepy mascot), but an 80th-minute goal from Michael Orozco Fiscal—and some incredible goaltending goalkeeping from Tim Howard—gave the US a historic 1-0 win ...

Mexico's Official Soccer Mascot Will Haunt Your Dreams
This is Kin, the official mascot of the Mexican national soccer team, which faces the USA tonight at Estadio Azteca. Mexico is 23-0-1 all-time against the USMNT on its home soil, though I'm thinking it's the hideous sight of this monstrosity and not the extreme altitude or exuberant fanbase that's t...

French Soccer Stars Will Face Charges For Sexing 16-Year-Old Prostitute
Bayern's Franck Ribery and Real Madrid's Karim Benzema got into a spot of trouble in 2010, when a Paris prostitution ring was busted and their names popped up in a little black book. Even worse, it turned out they had paid for sex with then-16-year-old Zahia Dehar, who, in the players' defense, didn...

How New York's New MLS Stadium Heralds The Return Of The Cosmos
Top-level soccer hasn't been played within New York's city limits since 1976, when the Cosmos packed up for Giants Stadium and took the country's brief love affair with domestic pro soccer with them. The drought might be close to over, as MLS and local politicians seem intent on returning a team to ...

New York City Is About To Get A New MLS Team That Might Be Owned By A Rich Dude From Dubai
The New York Post reports today that the city is on the verge of approving a deal for a $300 million stadium that would be little more than a corner kick from CitiField and Arthur Ashe Stadium in Flushing Meadows Corona Park....

Watch Some Poor Sap Miss A Wide Open Goal Twice
We can argue for days about what miss is "the worst miss ever." This one is on the list. It is so terribly unthinkable, in fact, that the play-by-play man believed the sure thing goal was waived off for some reason, perhaps offsides....

Soccer Player Hits Referee, Match Abandoned After Referee Flops To The Ground
Benfica defender Luisão (wearing number four in black) punched or shoved or hit referee Christian Fischer during a match between Fortuna Dusseldorf and Benfica which resulted in the match being abandoned. Sure, the officials should never be physically battered, or assaulted for that matter, but th...

Mexico Leads Brazil 1-0 At The Half Thanks To This Goal 29 Seconds Into The Match
Oribe Peralta put Mexico up 1-0 on Brazil in today's men's soccer gold medal match, and the score's remained that way ever since. The big news is that Brazil subbed on MOTHERFUCKIN' HULK (we're a big fan of his, remember) despite him being about the least-popular athlete in Brazil at the moment. Di...

The <i>New York Times</i> Tries Its Hand At Animated Gifs. It Does Not Go Well.
If Buzzfeed and the Times made a baby, and it had epilepsy, it would look like this: "10 Animated GIFs From London 2012." These gifs are different—they're constructed from rapid fire shots taken by the Times's photographers, rather than from actual moving pictures. It sort of defeats the entire purp...

Sporting KC Wins U.S. Open Cup In Shootout Described As "More Dramatic Than Tyler Perry Or Shakespeare"
That GolTV still exists is a miracle in itself; the soccer cable net recently lost its cash cow Spanish Liga contract to Al-Jazeera's new beIN Sports channel. It also lost popular analyst Ray Hudson, he of the orgasmic goal calls, which means GolTV's George D. Metellus served in the color commenta...

Tony Hibbert's First Career Goal Leads To An All-Out Celebration Riot
Defender Tony Hibbert was born in Merseyside, home to Everton FC, in 1981. He won a championship with Everton's youth club in 1998 and has played with the English Premier League team since 2001. But the most critical thing you have to know about Tony Hibbert is that he had never scored a goal. Eve...

Canadian Women's Soccer Players May Face FIFA Discipline For Claiming Yesterday's Semifinal Was Rigged
Members of the Canadian women's national soccer team are under fire for comments they made after yesterday's thriller of a match won by the U.S. with seconds to spare....

Alex Morgan's Header In Added Time Of Extra Time Delivered Team USA To The Gold Medal Match
After a brutal battle that included a hat trick from Canadian captain Christine Sinclair, Alex Morgan headed home a cross from Heather O'Reilly and delivered an invitation for the U.S. women to face Japan at Wembley Stadium in a rematch of last year's Women's World Cup final. The goal came 2:30 i...

Columbus Crew Midfielder Kirk Urso Is Dead At 22
Columbus Crew midfielder Kirk Urso is dead, according to a press release from the MLS team. There's no cause announced, and we'll be sure to update as soon as we hear anything else....

NBC Sports's Broadcast Of Olympic Soccer Cuts To Commercial Right Before A Critical Goal
NBC took its Olympic broadcast chicken-fucking to another level today, when a live feed of the Japan-Brazil women's soccer game on the network's Olympics website cut to commercial right before one of the game's critical moments. Instead of seeing the Japanese team score a goal in the 72nd minute t...

MLS Defender's First Career Score Was This Miraculous, Game-Tying Goal In Injury Time
If anyone ever openly doubts the idea that it's better to be lucky than good, show them this video of Sporting KC defender Kyle Miller, who used his head in a most fortuitous manner Wednesday night, scoring the injury-time equalizer in a friendly against Stoke City of the Premier League. Even bett...
![Player Sent Home For Threatening To "Burn All Of You [Koreans], Bunch Of Retards"](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17ufq4ald9sg9jpg.jpg)
Player Sent Home For Threatening To "Burn All Of You [Koreans], Bunch Of Retards"
Last week we told you about Voula Papachristou, the Greek triple jumper whose xenophobic, right-wing attitude got her booted from the Olympics. Today, Swiss soccer player Michel Morganella has been sent home after he decided his Twitter followers should hear his own batshit remarks....

Evil Colombian Lady Suspended Two Matches For Sucker-Punching American Treasure Abby Wambach
In the first half of Saturday’s 3-0 win over Colombia, Abby Wambach took a fist to the face from exquisitely named forward Lady Andrade. The refs missed it completely, and Wambach was sporting a black eye after the match....