Soccer Page 347 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Thousands Of Irish Soccer Fans Sing Their Team Off After A Crushing Defeat
Ireland got thrashed by Spain today, 4-0, in the second match of the group stage, but the loyal Irish faithful that flew into Gdansk for the match nonetheless sang their team off the pitch with a rousing rendition of "The Fields of Athenry" in the waning moments. It's basically like a couple thous...

Swedish Team In Trouble After Bare-Assed Game Of "Butts Up"
In my schoolyard it was called "butts up." In yours, it might have been "asses up," "wallball," "red ass," "suicide," but the game is the same, and taps in to the primal center of young boys' brains. It's essentially handball, but the first one to run up a certain number of "outs" must lean against ...

From Ukraine With Love: 24 Racism-Free Hours At Euro 2012
KIEV & KHARKIV, Ukraine—The fast train from Kiev to Kharkiv takes four hours. I know this, although I am not on it. I want to be on it, but tickets are gone, sold weeks ago to assorted Germans and other more prepared fans traveling from the Ukrainian capital to the industrial city that lies 300 mile...

Two Croatian Government Workers Are In Trouble For Flashing Everyone At Euro 2012
Croatia took a vital three points from Ireland over the weekend, sending fans into spasms of joy and occasional nudity. Now two women face losing their jobs after photos of them baring their chests at Sunday's match—including one of an Irish fan licking one woman's breasts—have been seen by pretty m...

Russian And Polish Fans May Kill Each Other Before Their Match Starts
Here are some of the videos that have surfaced from this morning's clashes between Russian and Polish soccer fans, before their teams' match later today at Euro 2012. According to one (biased) account, a Russian fan march was set upon by Polish supporters, and broken up by police firing tear gas a...

Ukraine's 2-1 Comeback Win Left This Swede Feeling Black In The Face
So, yeah, the racism promised to emerge at Euro 2012 in Poland and Ukraine actually did, though in classic 1960's spy drama fashion everyone's blaming the Russians. Sweden had no one to blame but themselves, meanwhile, after a stunning performance by Andriy Shevchenko led Ukraine past the Swedes fo...

Polish Riot Police Vs. Croatian Hooligans—Who Ya Got?
We knew Polish police came prepared for Euro 2012, pants-pissing sound cannons and all. And we expected Eastern European fans to make trouble, because that's what they do. (UEFA has already opened an investigation into racist abuse from Russian fans.) But it turns out our first battle in the stree...

108-Foot Roy Hodgson Erected On English Coast
"Roy the Redeemer" was unveiled this week, a massive statue of England manager aping the famous Christ sculpture in Brazil. He stands above the cliffs of Dover, and is supposedly visible from France. (The two nations face each other on Monday.)...

Piss Cannons And Scrotum-Seeking Dogs: Poland Is READY For Euro 2012
We already dealt with the possibility of trouble inside the stadiums at the European Championship, starting tomorrow. But what about non-matchdays? It's one solid month of foreigners, drunk and nationalistic, roaming an unfamiliar country. Some countries (England) have a reputation for traveling in ...

Just Try To Ignore Those Racist Chants At Euro 2012
The theme of the European Championship, which begins tomorrow, is racism. (To be fair to Poland and the Ukraine, the themes of international soccer over the last five years have been racism and goal-line technology. UEFA has made roughly the same progress on the two.) The BBC kicked it off with thei...

The Portugal-Turkey Friendly Featured A Portuguese Flag Tifo Using Thousands Of Tablet Computers
While Portugal's Euro 2012 tune-up with Turkey didn't produce the expected result (Cristiano Ronaldo missed a penalty kick and Portugal lost 3-1) they can take pride in the display shown during "A Portuguesa," the Portuguese National Anthem. Thousands of tablet computers (possibly iPads, though it...

Patrice Evra Wipes His "Backside" With A Teammate's Shirt, France Beside Itself
What you see here is, evidently, a grown man and professional athlete wiping his "backside" with a shirt and then sniffing it. This quote, which is being attributed to a Parisian magazine, Le 10 Sport evidences France's apoplexy....

Fifth-Tier Amateur Soccer Club Beats Portland Timbers In Biggest U.S. Open Cup Upset Ever
It's been a rough week for MLS teams in U.S. Open Cup competition, as eight teams from the nation's top soccer league fell to lower-tier competition in the tournament open to all sanctioned clubs in the country. The latest such loss is the most embarrassing, as the Portland Timbers lost 1-0 in extr...

Viggo Mortensen Almost Got Kicked Out Of Dulles Airport For Cheering His Favorite Soccer Team
There are some things that Viggo Mortensen will not be denied. One is completing a quest to destroy the One Ring before the forces of Mordor rise up and take over Middle-earth with an army of mutated John Kruks. The other is watching Club Atlético San Lorenzo de Almagro, the Buenos Aires soccer club...

Mario Balotelli Does Thing
Mario Balotelli's prepared for any racism that might erupt during this summer's Euro 2012 competition in Poland and the Ukraine. Prepared to go to jail, that is, telling France Football he's all too willing to face hate with violence:...

World Celebrates As Celebrity Chef Gordon Ramsay Seriously Injured In Charity Soccer Match
Professional asshole Gordon Ramsay left Sunday's Soccer Aid charity match in Manchester on a stretcher after a hefty tackle by former English soccer star Teddy Sheringham left the Hell's Kitchen chef in pain and gasping for air....

Saturday's United States-Scotland Friendly Featured A Clash Of Terribly-Performed National Anthems
The U.S. Men's National Team thrashed Scotland 5-1 in Jacksonville Saturday on the strength of a Landon Donovan hat trick, but the festival atmosphere at EverBank Field (where the attendance of 44,438 set a record for national friendlies in the state) was nearly snuffed out before the match ever be...

A K-Leaguer May Have Set The World Record For Fastest-Ever Free Kick Goal
Australian defender Eddy Bosnar's free kick goal for Korean squad Suwon Bluewings may be a new record holder for velocity after scoring Sunday against Ulsan....

Premier League Teams Are Hemorrhaging Money, And TV Revenue Sharing Could Be To Blame
Here's some not-so-great news on the heels of a thrilling end to the Premier League—no one's making any money. Actually, that's not true—five teams turned a profit in 2010-2011, the last season for which financials are available. But despite a record $3.6 billion income, the 20 Premier League clubs ...

Women's Professional Soccer Is Officially Dead
The WPS announced today that the league has officially folded, and there will be no effort to rebuild after an already-cancelled 2012 season. I can give you two reasons for this rough news, and one is Dan Borislow, possibly the worst man in sports....