Soccer Page 349 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Watch Some Poor Sap Miss A Wide Open Goal Twice
We can argue for days about what miss is "the worst miss ever." This one is on the list. It is so terribly unthinkable, in fact, that the play-by-play man believed the sure thing goal was waived off for some reason, perhaps offsides....

Soccer Player Hits Referee, Match Abandoned After Referee Flops To The Ground
Benfica defender Luisão (wearing number four in black) punched or shoved or hit referee Christian Fischer during a match between Fortuna Dusseldorf and Benfica which resulted in the match being abandoned. Sure, the officials should never be physically battered, or assaulted for that matter, but th...

Mexico Leads Brazil 1-0 At The Half Thanks To This Goal 29 Seconds Into The Match
Oribe Peralta put Mexico up 1-0 on Brazil in today's men's soccer gold medal match, and the score's remained that way ever since. The big news is that Brazil subbed on MOTHERFUCKIN' HULK (we're a big fan of his, remember) despite him being about the least-popular athlete in Brazil at the moment. Di...

The <i>New York Times</i> Tries Its Hand At Animated Gifs. It Does Not Go Well.
If Buzzfeed and the Times made a baby, and it had epilepsy, it would look like this: "10 Animated GIFs From London 2012." These gifs are different—they're constructed from rapid fire shots taken by the Times's photographers, rather than from actual moving pictures. It sort of defeats the entire purp...

Sporting KC Wins U.S. Open Cup In Shootout Described As "More Dramatic Than Tyler Perry Or Shakespeare"
That GolTV still exists is a miracle in itself; the soccer cable net recently lost its cash cow Spanish Liga contract to Al-Jazeera's new beIN Sports channel. It also lost popular analyst Ray Hudson, he of the orgasmic goal calls, which means GolTV's George D. Metellus served in the color commenta...

Tony Hibbert's First Career Goal Leads To An All-Out Celebration Riot
Defender Tony Hibbert was born in Merseyside, home to Everton FC, in 1981. He won a championship with Everton's youth club in 1998 and has played with the English Premier League team since 2001. But the most critical thing you have to know about Tony Hibbert is that he had never scored a goal. Eve...

Canadian Women's Soccer Players May Face FIFA Discipline For Claiming Yesterday's Semifinal Was Rigged
Members of the Canadian women's national soccer team are under fire for comments they made after yesterday's thriller of a match won by the U.S. with seconds to spare....

Alex Morgan's Header In Added Time Of Extra Time Delivered Team USA To The Gold Medal Match
After a brutal battle that included a hat trick from Canadian captain Christine Sinclair, Alex Morgan headed home a cross from Heather O'Reilly and delivered an invitation for the U.S. women to face Japan at Wembley Stadium in a rematch of last year's Women's World Cup final. The goal came 2:30 i...

Columbus Crew Midfielder Kirk Urso Is Dead At 22
Columbus Crew midfielder Kirk Urso is dead, according to a press release from the MLS team. There's no cause announced, and we'll be sure to update as soon as we hear anything else....

NBC Sports's Broadcast Of Olympic Soccer Cuts To Commercial Right Before A Critical Goal
NBC took its Olympic broadcast chicken-fucking to another level today, when a live feed of the Japan-Brazil women's soccer game on the network's Olympics website cut to commercial right before one of the game's critical moments. Instead of seeing the Japanese team score a goal in the 72nd minute t...

MLS Defender's First Career Score Was This Miraculous, Game-Tying Goal In Injury Time
If anyone ever openly doubts the idea that it's better to be lucky than good, show them this video of Sporting KC defender Kyle Miller, who used his head in a most fortuitous manner Wednesday night, scoring the injury-time equalizer in a friendly against Stoke City of the Premier League. Even bett...
![Player Sent Home For Threatening To "Burn All Of You [Koreans], Bunch Of Retards"](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17ufq4ald9sg9jpg.jpg)
Player Sent Home For Threatening To "Burn All Of You [Koreans], Bunch Of Retards"
Last week we told you about Voula Papachristou, the Greek triple jumper whose xenophobic, right-wing attitude got her booted from the Olympics. Today, Swiss soccer player Michel Morganella has been sent home after he decided his Twitter followers should hear his own batshit remarks....

Evil Colombian Lady Suspended Two Matches For Sucker-Punching American Treasure Abby Wambach
In the first half of Saturday’s 3-0 win over Colombia, Abby Wambach took a fist to the face from exquisitely named forward Lady Andrade. The refs missed it completely, and Wambach was sporting a black eye after the match....

Olympics Protect Their Sponsors By Covering Up Some White Seats At Old Trafford
Old Trafford, home of Manchester United, has been hosting some of the preliminary matches in Olympic soccer. That means the "Brand Exclusion Zone"—the desolate no-man's-land where only official sponsor's logos and products are allowed, and all others are physically barred—isn't limited to East Londo...

Singer Of Worst National Anthem Performance Ever Blames Vuvuzelas For Making Her Sing Off-Key
The parents of 11-year-old Harper Gruzins are defending their daughter's performance of "The Star-Spangled Banner" before Saturday's Galaxy-FC Dallas match, claiming critics who called it the worst national anthem performance ever are "mean and hateful."...

The Cats Are Fat And Happy
South Korea drew 0-0 with Mexico in an early but entertaining men's soccer match this morning, one with a result we think satisfied this fan—if only because it meant he could finally take that ridiculous thing off....

FIFA Can't Even Properly Ban Corrupt Executives
Let's make this clear: No one believes Mohammed bin Hammam, the FIFA executive committee member instrumental in bringing the 2022 World Cup to his native Qatar, didn't bribe people. It's still pretty much accepted that bin Hammam was the brains behind the envelopes full of cash handed out to represe...

Japan Made Its Women's Soccer Team Fly Economy, While Putting The Men In Business Class
Despite winning last year's World Cup, the Japanese women's national soccer team couldn't escape economy class on their Japan Airlines flight from Tokyo to Paris this week—despite the men's national team riding in business class....

English Soccer Having Another Dumb Racist Twitter Thing
When a student was jailed for racist tweets directed at Fabrice Muamba, it was an opportunity to discuss the British justice system and the perils of online anonymity. When John Terry was cleared of racially abusing Anton Ferdinand, it was an opportunity to quote a judge saying "cunt" about 72 times...