Soccer Page 373 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Muppet Goalie Lawsuit? Muppet Goalie Lawsuit
Arsenal's Jens Lehmann is suing fellow goalie Tim Wiese of Werder Bremen for telling media Lehmann should "go to the Muppet Show" back in September. He's seeking $28,000....
Wayne Rooney Scored A Hat Trick, Swore In Celebration, Got A Two-Match Ban
Premier League justice is worse than Sheriff Goodell's....
This Nine-Year-Old Kid Might Well Be The World's Next Greatest Soccer Player
This lad, who has yet to be publicly identified, is being called "The Japanese Messi." For good reason. The kid's got footwork, pace and panache to the point where the guy who coached "The Real Messi" as a youth has linked to this clip via Twitter. Or, it could just be a farce, which would be sad....
Here's A Textbook Soccer-Ball-To-Child's-Head Video
This is apparently a couple months old, but it's new to us, and it's a Friday afternoon. Enjoy your CTE, kid....
Fourth Official Holds Up A Massive Electrical Condom
Looking very much like Leslie Nielsen did in that Naked Gun scene when he thrusts a giant Johnny over his head to do the nasty with Elvis's ex, here's a Thai official holding up his Durex-sponsored extra-time board....
Weeklong Ochocinco/MLS Publicity Stunt Culminates In Predictable Publicity Stunt
We honestly love Chad Ochocinco without reserve. He's like if a little kid wished to the Big fortune teller machine to be a pro athlete, and got it. His actions seem genuine, so we weren't as turned off as a lot of people by his experiment with Sporting KC, to see if he still had his soccer skills f...
Watch 16-Year-Old Indi Cowie Juggle A Soccer Ball Better Than The Boys
This week, the New York Times Magazine has the classic story about the quiet, anonymous Scottish-American high school sophomore girl who happens to be one of the best freestyle soccer players in the world. Stop me if you've heard this one before....
Dennis Rommedahl Scores An Absolute Rocket
It may have escaped your attention, what with Wales and England's titanic battle at the Millennium Stadium being so tight and tense, but Norway played Denmark at the weekend and the score finished 1-1. BOOORING!...
Dead Man Attends Soccer Game
You, as an American, are now even rarer for not liking soccer. While you previously only had to contend with billions of people on the planet, they can now count the dead among their number....
The Best Soccer Player On Earth Will Likely Embarrass The Americans At Some Point Tonight
There's a scene in Vision Quest in which Louden Swain's boss Elmo gets to talking about why he took the night off of work, sans pay, to watch Louden wrestle the mighty Gary Shute. He got to talking about Pele....
Watch Old Zinedine Zidane Abuse A Young Goalie
The Magician will be doing this until he's 80. Class. Pure class. I like how after Zidane finishes toying with this poor lad at some recent Adidas event, he goes over to see if the kid will ever recover....
Soccer Match On Field Surrounded By Barbed Wire Unpredictably Marred By "Absurd Violence"
To some, this may look like referee Augusto Vego getting attacked by unhappy Río Segundo players in their lower-tier Argentine match with Sportivo Club....
Qataris Develop Artificial Cloud To Keep Pitch Cool During World Cup
Qatar 2022 will undoubtedly see at least 15 times more pissing and moaning than we had to endure during the South African World Cup last year, but if even half the technology proposed for the games comes to light, it'll remain a fantastic spectacle....
So, Who’s Gonna Get Relegated From The Premier League?
The top of the Premier League ain't that exciting. Arsenal will fall away, Chelsea will come back into it and push Man Utd for a bit before dropping out to leave Fergie and his phone to win it with two games to spare....
Goalkeeper Misses The Ball, Knees Opposing Player Directly In The Face
In Ukranian professional soccer action on Sunday, Volyn keeper Vitaliy Nedilko tried to collect a loose ball and instead collided directly with Luiz Adriano's face. To those who say soccer isn't a contact sport: it is when player's noses are crushed inside their faces, okay? Adriano's squad, Shakh...
Canadian Hero Steve Nash Pumps Up Fellow Canadians At Canadian MLS Game
Steve Nash attended the Vancouver Whitecaps' first regular season game this weekend and, almost on his own, totally pumped up the crowd. The part-owner stands up in a personalized MLS jersey and waves a scarf back and forth, to the utter delight his countrymen. If inspiring the home crowd was Nash...
Brazilian Wunderkind Kicks A Soccer Ball Through The Goal Net
Seventeen-year-old Lucas Piazon followed up his record signing with Chelsea earlier this week with a shot that went through the goal netting in this weekend's under-17 match between Brazil and Paraguay. Brazil won Saturday's match 2-1, but the debate about whether he kicks the ball really hard or ...
Charlie Davies Returns To Soccer With A Two-Goal Game For D.C. United
Seventeen months after getting seriously injured in a car wreck that cost him a shot at a 2010 World Cup roster spot, Charlie Davies returned to the pitch in D.C. United's season opener against Columbus last night. He scored on a penalty kick in the 63rd minute, and added a second goal about 15 mi...
Of Tangled Bibs And The Human Condition
Man City's Mario Balotelli struggled with his bib before yesterday's Europa League win over Dynamo Kiev. It wasn't easy—Balotelli was red carded in the 36th minute. Not for the bib thing....
ESPN Soccernet Scrubs Fake Interview With New West Brom Manager
ESPN Soccernet's West Bromwich Albion blogger posted a fake interview with Roy Hodgson, the real new West Brom manager, this afternoon. Within minutes, higher-ups at the WWL had deleted the post, per @dirtytackle....