Soccer Page 379 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Does Rubbish Refereeing Ruin Soccer? Debating The Dumbest Red Card Ever
The Spoiler is never one to jump on a bandwagon, in fact, we still love Nick Clegg, we don't think the Kings of Leon have, like, totally sold out and some of our best friends are bankers....
Belgian Goalie Forgets How To Throw At The Worst Possible Time, Assists Opponent's Goal
Sammy Bossut, goalkeeper for Zulte-Waregem in the Belgian Pro League, pulled down a corner kick in a match against Lokeren over the weekend and, channeling a certain Giants quarterback, held onto the ball a little too long in his attempt to throw it down-field. Zulte-Waregem lost 2-1....
Here's Video Of Messi's Pretty Goal From Today's Barca-Arsenal Match
FC Barcelona defeated Arsenal 3-1 this evening in Camp Nou. Lionel Messi scored twice — first on this pretty self-assist over the goalkeeper's head just before halftime, and second on a penalty kick in the 71st minute of play. With a 4-3 lead over Arsenal on aggregate, Barcelona will now go on to ...
Soccer Player Tackles Streaker, Gets Red Carded For His Trouble
Come with us to Conference South, the sixth level of the English football pyramid. During yesterday's game, Dorchester Town defender/manager Ashley Vickers was sent off for bringing down a mankini-wearing fan. It's hard to blame him: Conference South security apparently consists of calling the loc...
A Message From Sepp Blatter On International Women's Day
I suppose we should have expected Sepp Blatter to hoist himself onto a soapbox this morning. It is, after all, the 100th anniversary of International Women's Day, which means it's also a perfect opportunity for Blatter to bleat some of the shameless agitprop for which he's beloved:...
Some Videos Of Football People Weeping And Wailing
The Spoiler is feeling all emotional this Monday, but as we're unable to find our copy of The Notebook, we've decided to reminisce about players and managers, past and present, who've shed salty tears of despair over The Beautiful Game....
Man U Player Suffers "Horrific Injury That Cut To The Bone"
It wasn't quite Lawrence Taylor meets Joe Theismann's leg, but Manchester United's Nani suffered a pretty gnarly leg injury during today's 3-1 loss to Liverpool....
German Fan Violence Turns Underwhelming Soccer Match Into Overwhelming Soccer Scene
Today's Bundesliga match between Kaiserslautern and Frankfurt had all the makings of an exercise in excessive boredom. Frankfurt hasn't scored in eight games; Kaiserslautern hasn't won a match in 2011....
Kicking A Fan In The Face Is Eric Cantona's Most Treasured Memory
Cantona, on his famous flying kick of an abusive fan: "I think that maybe it's like a dream for some people sometimes, to kick these kinds of people. So I did it for them. So they are happy." [The First Post]...
Every Last Player And Coach Got Red Carded In A Single Soccer Match In Argentina
Quite a bit of scrapping went down in a recent Argentinian lower-level soccer match between Claypole and Victoriano Arenas. So much scrapping that referee Damien Rubino issued 36 red cards. One was for bad behavior during the halftime break....
Celtic V Rangers Madness — Everyone Goes Crazy!
El Hadji Diouf playing for Rangers against Celtic. What could go wrong?...
Chelsea Owner Roman Abramovich Relieved To Still Have The World's Biggest Symbolic Penis
Thought we couldn't put a sports spin on the recent revelation that Teodoro Nguema Obiang Mangue, the son of the dictator of Equatorial Guinea, had commissioned a yacht with a movie theater on board? Wrong....
When Life Hands You Torrential Downpours, Make Your Soccer Stadium A Water Park
On Monday, a soccer game between Brazil's Sao Paulo and Palmeiras at Morumbi Stadium was delayed a few hours due to very heavy rain. The fans who showed up early did not let it spoil the party, and treated the 80,000-seat facility like a giant water park for the entire game, which ended in a 1-1 d...
Soccer Player Who Killed Fluffy, Defenseless Owl May Get Jail Time
Luis Moreno, the defender for Deportivo Pereira of Colombia's Primara A who kicked an opposing club's pet owl off the field on Sunday, could get up to three months of jail time for the incident. The owl was treated for traumatic stress at Zoosalud veterinary clinic in Barranquilla, Colombia, but die...
American Brutalizes Canada With Sensational Goal In Jamaica
Nathan Smith, defender from California, robbed Canada of its desire to compete and live on Sunday when he scored this incredible goal during extra time of the 2011 CONCACAF U-17 championship in Montego Bay, Jamaica. The goal broke the 450-minute shutout streak of Canadian keeper Maxime Crepeau, wh...
Italian Soccer Team Takes Giant Dump All Over Sportsmanship
Yes, we know that headline sounds redundant. But check out what Lega Pro (third tier) side Foggia pulled off yesterday. Down a goal with five minutes remaining, a Foggia player went down "injured." As is customary, Gela kicked the ball out to give him a chance to recover. But Foggia rushed a throw...
Here's A Soccer Player Kicking A Defenseless Fluffy Owl In The Face
This is a clip from a Sunday match between Junior Barranquilla and Deportivo Pereira of Colombia's Primara A. The owl, which is apparently Junior's club pet, made it on to the field in the middle of play and Pereira defender Luis Moreno swiftly booted it three meters off the field. Moreno hasn't b...
MLS Playoffs To Admit More Good Teams, Bad Teams, Possibly Your Grandmother
Getting into the MLS playoffs this year will be about as difficult as securing admission to the dogshit community college down the road from you. That's because the wise men who run the MLS have decided to let two more crap teams into a playoff system that not only confuses foreign players accustome...
Everything Right With Soccer, In Three Minutes Of Incredible Non-Dives
Technically, Barcelona and Argentina forward Lionel Messi dove a few times, in a literal sense, as he was hip-checked, tripped up and otherwise impeded by lesser talents. Problem is, Messi missed several opportunities to flail about to pad his stat sheet. He is the Best Soccer Player On Earth....
Sepp Blatter Never Met A Disaster He Couldn't Exploit
When we named Sepp Blatter one of the 10 worst men in sports earlier this month, we were being kind. Blatter's repugnance extends well beyond sports. He runs FIFA like a Swiss bank, hoovering up billions of dollars and disbursing them in ways that remain as mysterious as they sound dubious. And all ...