Something Bad's Going To Happen In That Crypt, Huh?

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We’re now two episodes into the final season of Game of Thrones—HBO’s hit show that asks, How bad is it, really, to smooch your nephew?—and so far, not a lot has happened. There should be a severe uptick in action next week, and some of it will most likely involve a crypt.

[Spoilers ahead for episodes 1 and 2, although there’s not all that much to spoil]

Last night’s episode ended with the army of the dead showing up at Winterfell’s door, delivering on the threat that was foreshadowed in the first-ever scene of the show and capping off an hour spent with almost every major character as they pondered their rapidly approaching deaths. Some got drunk, some confessed to their aunt/lover that they were in fact their nephew/possible king, and some got lucky underground. Nobody seemed optimistic about the prospect of defeating an untold number of shrieking ice zombies, though plans must be made nonetheless.


Sadly those plans are pretty limp. The fighting people will fight the ice zombies outside while the living dragons provide air support, theoretically buying time to coax the Night King to come for Bran while he chills and looks at his favorite tree (why the Night King wouldn’t just wait for everyone to be dead is beyond me). Meanwhile, everyone who isn’t a soldier will wait in the crypt below Winterfell.

Did you catch that? The crypt. All anyone could talk about were crypt logistics. There was a very deliberate scene where Davos deputized a little girl to defend the crypt (why didn’t she take some bread?), pointed discussion about consigning Tyrion to the crypt, and a heated argument between Mormonts about whether or not Lyanna Mormont should wait in the crypt. The crypt was also the site of Jon Snow’s confession to Daenerys in this episode and the place where Sam delivered the bad news in the premiere. The writers of this show sure have spent a lot of time centering the crypt as an important location during these last two episodes.


My question is this: Don’t any of these dum-dums in Winterfell know that they keep dead people in the crypt? Have they forgotten that the Night King’s whole deal is raising the dead and turning them into killer ice zombies? Things are about to get very hairy down in that crypt, man.

Lyanna Stark could make her second appearance on the show, and fans might finally get to meet dead legends Brandon and Rickard Stark. It’d be fitting if the Night King raised Headless Ned Stark to go on a murder spree, since his whole thing is a complete erasure of the past, present, and future, and the Winterfell crypt are treated with utter reverence throughout the books and run of the show.


The buildup to this season was specifically focused on this part of the Starks’ home. The first teaser trailer featured Jon, Arya, and Sansa spookily wandering around the crypt, as the A/C kicks in and the ground freezes over in that distinctly White Walkerish way.

In the preview footage for next week’s episode, Daenerys tells Jon, “The dead are already here,” which seems like something she wouldn’t have to say since everyone was already aware of the legions of yelling bone people. Also, these moments are only on screen for a second, but Arya is shown sprinting through some sort of darkly lit chamber, and Varys is seen looking scared in the crypt, which is a nice little echo to Season 1, when he visited Ned while the Stark lord was being held in King’s Landing before he parted with his head. Maybe Zombie Ned will throw his head at people.

Additionally, this doesn’t fit in with any crypt stuff, but I want it on record: Zombie Hodor is coming.