16 Page 37 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Boring Euro 2016 Got The Boring Portugal-Wales Semifinal It Deserves
Euro 2016 has kind of sucked. There haven’t been more than about four honest-to-goodness entertaining games, the over-expanded field and the resulting imbalanced matchups have given us too many teams too content to play—“play”—for 0-0 draws, and only a couple of the best teams and players have put o...

Deadspin Awards: Most Insane Coach
The Deadspin Awards are this month, and we need our readers to decide the winners of these prestigious honors. Today, we ask you to help us determine the answer to an important question: Who is the most insane coach of them all?...


Two Favorites Tangle, Two Fresh Faces Step Up, And A Strong 800 Meter Olympic Team Emerges
What the heck is that, above? It’s years of 24/7 grind going down the tubes in a hundredth of a second. It’s dreams dying and being made. It’s bad luck and dumb luck. And according to USA Track & Field, it’s incidental contact. It’s the sport of track and field....

UEFA Is Sick And Tired Of All These Adorable Children
Some of the most endearing images from the Euros were snapped after Wales beat Belgium in the quarterfinals, when some of the ecstatic Welshmen celebrated the feat alongside their adorable children. Naturally, the haters at UEFA didn’t like these photos of pure joy and don’t want the scenes to be re...

Russian Players Punished For Allegedly Spending €250K On Champagne After Euros Loss
The video you see above—in which an unending stream of bartenders at a Monaco nightclub lug bucket after bucket after bucket of Armand de Brignac champagne (about €500 per bottle, times the reported 500 bottles in circulation, equalling a €250,000 bar tab—not counting tip and sparkler fees) to the t...

Deadspin Awards: Best Bills Fan
The Deadspin Awards are this month, and we need our readers to decide the winners of these prestigious honors. Today, we ask you to help us determine the answer to an important question: Who is the best Buffalo Bills fan of them all?...

Iceland Did One Last Viking Clap With Their Fans
Iceland lost to France 5-2 in the Euro quarterfinals, after getting bum rushed for four goals in the first half. But the fact that Iceland—population: the same as Santa Ana, California, a city you didn’t know existed—even advanced far enough to get knocked out by France was a tremendous accomplishme...

Rio Police Officers To Visitors: "Welcome To Hell"
Yesterday, members of the Rio de Janeiro police force staged a protest at the city’s airport, claiming that they haven’t been paid for months and thus will not be able to sufficiently police the city during the Summer Olympics....

Iceland Turn Back Into A Pumpkin, Give Up Four First-Half Goals To France
Iceland headed into their quarterfinal with France on the high of destroying England and sending the over-anxious Anglos into full meltdown mode. The entirety of Iceland has been watching their Viking boys wreck shit and play coherent, organized soccer, and an upset against France would be easily th...

Germany Beat Italy After Miserable, Awful PK Shootout
A mostly-uninspired Germany-Italy quarterfinal devolved to a terrible penalty shootout, one finally and mercifully won by Germany after Matteo Darmian became the last of many Italians to choke. He only ever approached the ball thanks to fuckups by Müller, Özil, and Schweinsteiger that forced PK over...

Cristiano Ronaldo Freaked The Fuck Out During The Portugal-Poland Penalty Shootout
We’re used to seeing Cristiano Ronaldo as the picture of confidence, swaggering around the pitch with his chest all puffed and his chin to the sky. But Ronaldo is indeed human (or at least has recently underwent a software upgrade which included a new and incredibly realistic human behavior-miming m...

Sweet Mother Of God, Radja Nainggolan Kicked This Ball So Hard
If you want to see what a perfectly struck shot from distance looks like, Radja Nainggolan’s deep jackhammer goal he just scored for Belgium against Wales is it:...


Renato Sanches Is Super Cute And Super Good
Yesterday’s Portugal-Poland match started in surprisingly auspicious fashion, considering it was a match between two teams with only a passing interest in doing anything fun or exciting in an effort to go out and win. Poland’s Robert Lewandowski scored the game’s first goal less than two minutes aft...

Deadspin Awards: Best Bear
The Deadspin Awards are in July, and we need our readers to decide the winners of these prestigious honors. Today, we ask you to help us determine the answer to an important question: Who is the best bear of them all?...

Idiot On The Field Invades Euro 2016 Quarterfinal
Today’s miserable extra time of the Poland-Portugal Euro 2016 quarterfinal became a little more spicy when an idiot on the field invaded the pitch right in the middle of a Portuguese offensive run. Tough luck, Ronaldo....

Michael Phelps Has Qualified For His Fifth Olympics
The most medaled human being in existence is going to make some more Olympic history. By winning the 200-meter butterfly at the Olympic trials in Omaha yesterday, Michael Phelps has qualified for his fifth summer games, a first for an American male swimmer....

Nearly Every Single TV In Iceland Had The Iceland-England Game On<em></em>
If I were Icelandic, I’d do just about everything in my power to get myself in front of a TV whenever my sweet boys in blue suited up during this miraculous Euro 2016 run of theirs. Apparently, actual Icelanders feel the same way, as almost literally every TV in the country was tuned in for Iceland’...

Report: Donald Trump Cobbles Together A Cast Of Sports Dickheads For GOP Convention<em></em>
Donald Trump, a pile of faux-leather designer handbag knockoffs, has compiled a murderers’ row of sports figures for next month’s Republican National Convention in Cleveland. Bloomberg Politics reports that Mike Tyson, Mike Ditka, Bobby Knight, and NASCAR CEO Brian France have all chosen to shed wha...