2 Page 183 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
What Happened To All The Interesting Refs?
One of the nerdier things a basketball fan can do at 9 a.m. Eastern Weirdo Time is to go to the NBA website and glom onto the identities of the officials who will work whatever game interests you True, NBA ref nerddom is an exceedingly small subset of Nerdvania, but let a thousand sets of hipster gl...
A Thorough And Informative 2019 NBA Finals Preview For Basketball Idiots
Hello, casual basketball viewer! At long last, the NBA Finals are here, and you know what that means: It’s time once again for you to crib a pitiful smattering of hoops knowledge from this extremely half-assed blog and carry it forth to the sports bar like the torch that lights your path....
Drake And The Raptors Both Got A Talking-To From The NBA
The Toronto Raptors will host Game 1 of the NBA Finals tonight, and there’s no doubt Drake will be sitting on the sideline. He’s behaved like an unruly dingus courtside in Toronto, blurring the lines between participant and bystander in ways that would make Spike Lee blush. Bucks coach Mike Budenhol...
Oskar Sundqvist Will Face Hearing For Hit That Hospitalized Matt Grzelcyk
Bruins defenseman Matt Grzelcyk was taken to the hospital after being boarded by Oskar Sundqvist in the first period of Wednesday’s 3-2 Blues overtime win. Sundqvist got just two minutes, but a bunch more might be coming: Sundqvist has a hearing with the NHL’s Department of Player Safety. ...
Vladimir Tarasenko Nearly Ripped Himself In Half Scoring This Goal
Carl Gunnarsson’s rocket of a winner for St. Louis in Game 2 last night understandably gets all the love and applause this morning —it gave the Blues their first-ever Stanley Cup Final win and sent them back home with hope instead of despair. But back in the first period, long before Gunnarsson’s go...
Carl Gunnarsson's Pissing Prediction Led To A Boston Pee Party
“Tonight it was hard, so I’m happy about that,” Oskar Sundqvist said, and he was talking about a shot, thank goodness. Specifically, teammate Carl Gunnarsson’s OT goal to give the Blues a 3-2 win and knot up the Stanley Cup Final at a game apiece....
Is This Abandoned Beer Or Fresh Piss?
ESPN hockey analyst Greg Wyshynski was on-hand for St. Louis’s stirring 3–2 overtime win over the dreaded Bruins in Game 2 of the Stanley Cup Final Wednesday night. Afterward, Wyshynski shot the following Blair Witch-style blurry video of two completely full cups of what he described as beer, tucked...
Carl Gunnarsson's Blue-Line Blast Gives The Blues Their First-Ever Stanley Cup Final Win
Folks, we got a series! After getting absolutely trounced in the final 39 minutes of Game 1, the St. Louis Blues showed that this Stanley Cup Final would not be a repeat of 1970. Rather than allow themselves to get steamrolled by the Bruins in Game 2, the Blues held their ground and beat Boston in o...
The Bruins Don't Want To Talk About Getting Into Bed With Barstool Sports
The Boston Bruins were happy to plug their Barstool Sports towels this morning ahead of tonight’s Game 2, but for some reason they now don’t want to talk about the partnership....
Kaapo Kakko Is A Good Teen Who's Too Busy Partying To Go To The NHL Combine
The World Championships were a coming-out party for Kaapo Kakko, who spent the last year tearing up Finland’s top pro league, before proving on an international stage that he can do more than just hang with the world’s best. The 18-year-old winger lit up Worlds for six goals in 10 games as Finland t...
Even If The Warriors Win, Oakland Loses
This is the real NBA Finals, the one that transcends Larry O’Brien, Kevin Durant, Kawhi Leonard, Doris Burke, Woj, Adam Silver, dynasties, the next Why-The-Lakers-Are-On-Fire tell-all, the works. This is Oakland’s last stand with the team it raised from a pup, its last healthy bite of an apple that ...
What Can The Raptors Possibly Do To Make People Believe The Lie?
The Raptors took down the Bucks on Saturday, 100-94, to clinch an NBA Finals berth for the first time in franchise history. With that series victory, Toronto seemingly vanquished the infamous Drake curse, exorcised the demons of past postseason failures and even vindicated Kawhi Leonard’s place as ...
This Kawhi Leonard Ball Fake Is Hypnotic
Kawhi Leonard has been doing a lot that’s reminiscent of Michael Jordan. The raw scoring—Leonard is up to 31.4 points per game this postseason—the shimmying midrange work, the perimeter defense. Add a new entry to the list: ball fakes only possible with enormous mitts. Check out this possession in G...
Aaron Rodgers Loses Chugging Contest Among Milwaukee-Area Sportsmen
Since the Toronto Raptors have Drake cheering them on, the Milwaukee Bucks need their own celebrity row. Green Bay lineman David Bakhtiari has filled a spot more than once, and he’s excelled at acting as a Rally Packer for the crowd. All he has to do is chug beers, and the crowd gets fired up....
A Good And Smart Preview Of A Wide-Open 2019 WNBA Season
Hockey is almost over, and the NBA is basically done, so now all we have to look forward to over these impending hot summer months is a World Cup, the ability to blast Bad Girls out of our apartment windows, and some goddamn WNBA basketball. That last thing starts tonight, folks! Let’s get to the pr...
Drake Cuts Sweaty Promo About How Raptors Fans Are Really Good At Following The Rules
The Raptors beat the Milwaukee Bucks in Game 5 of the Eastern Conference Finals last night, and Drake, the Raptors’ rowdy uncle/human mascot, was not in the building. He was back home in Toronto, watching the game with thousands of Raptors fans in an outdoor square. He was so excited after the win t...
Raptors Defense Pushes Bucks To The Toilet's Edge In Game 5 Upset
The Milwaukee Bucks, the best team of the 2018–19 regular season and by far the best team through the first two rounds of the playoffs, find themselves in the deepest of caca following a 105–99 loss to the Toronto Raptors in Game 5 of the Eastern Conference Finals. The Bucks will have to stave off e...
Kevin Durant Probably Won't Be Ready For Start Of NBA Finals, Will Have Time To Continue Posting
Here’s some news that, perhaps perversely, should increase interest in the upcoming NBA Finals:...
Olympic Boxing Remains In Crisis
The Olympics are a bureaucratic rat’s nest, with national governing bodies, international governing bodies, host cities, various Olympic committees, and other assorted grifters jockeying for influence and money while also trying to put on the largest international sports spectacle in existence. One ...
Drake Has Become The Rowdy Uncle Of The Raptors
“In the Six cooking with the wrist motion,” Drake rapped prophetically in 2015. “The Six” refers to Toronto’s area code. “Wrist motion” refers to the stress relief he offered Raptors coach Nick Nurse late in their Game 4 Eastern Conference Finals win....