2 Page 443 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Come For The Olympics, Stay For The Genital Cuisine
Since everything else seems to be censored, intrepid Aussie Garry Linnell decided to sit down and sample the ox, sheep, deer, and donkey dongs at the finest restaurants in Beijing. Because nothing unites the world like a nice cock sandwich. Evidently animal penises are quite the delicacy in Beijing...
Government Issued Fashion Directives & the Internet Censors Who Love Them
The Olympics begin in August, and they're in China, so, you know, it should be a rather fascinating world event, if you're into fascinating world events. And we are proud to welcome back our Deadspin Beijing Bureau, our own trio of correspondents living in China and reporting on everything they see...
Amnesty International Is Trying To Haunt Your Olympic Dreams
Courtesy of the fantastic Copyranter comes the latest anti-China propaganda from Amnesty International. AI (not Iverson) has been pumping out the disturbing Olympic-themed-China=bad, bad people ad campaign for more than a year and will not stop until Citizens Of The Free World are so guilt-ridden th...
A Word On The Blacks And Mongolians Story...
The Olympics begin in August, and they're in China, so, you know, it should be a rather fascinating world event, if you're into fascinating world events. And we are proud to welcome back our Deadspin Beijing Bureau, our own trio of correspondents living in China and reporting on everything they see,...
Ya' Ever Play A Game Called "Texas Muffin Tumble" Lil' Lady?
Okay, so President G.W. Bush didn't exactly ask that question to softballer Jennie Finch, but the creepy sexual tension between these two just leaps off of this photo, does it not? But Bush wasn't in the White House Rose Garden just to give Finch the ol' shitkicker leer. He was there to formally sen...
Socialism Has Solved Every Traffic Jam In The World
You there. Yes, you. Don't you love freedom, apple pie, and John Mellencamp-crooned commercials? Of course you do. But you also hate traffic. "Oh God, everyone else driving is such an idiot! If they watched where they were going, I wouldn't be running behind, so I better call my friends and tell the...
Chinese Bar Owners Sign Pledge Not to Serve Blacks, Mongolians?
The report originated in Hong Kong's South China Morning Post and is, evidently, not a joke. I'm not an expert on the SCMP but it's evidently a reputable newspaper in Hong Kong. We've linked to the blog post discussing Miller's article because you have to subscribe to the newspaper to read some of t...
Dara Torres' Ex-Husband: Low On Sperm, High On Animosity
It appears the press might be getting a little sick of Dara Torres' old lady swim feats. At least that's the only reason it would seem the Palm Beach Post has decided to interview her embittered ex-husband. West Palm surgeon Itzhak Shasha and Torres were married for 16 months, but then divorced. Soo...
John McCain Gave up Steeler Linemen While Interrogated by Viet-Cong
In a further sign that neither candidate is going to give an inch of ground when it comes to doling out sporting bona fides in swing states, John McCain stepped up his wooing of Pittsburgh voters by discussing his affinity for their football team....
The Day After Wimbledon, Hyperbole Is At An All-Time High
After yesterday's exhilarating battle on the slippery grass at Wimbledon, most sports writers are flexing their purple muscles in the most amusing ways. Especially in Spain, a country that is probably on the verge of overdosing on sports euphoria after Nadal's victory came just a week after the Span...
John McEnroe: "The Greatest Match Ever I've Ever Seen..."
Rafael Nadal seemingly had won the 2008 Wiimbledon championship at three different moments during the epic nearly 5 hour match against Roger Federer. After two rain delays, two tiebreaker sets, and a final set sudden death where both he and Roger just sucked the life out of each other, it appeared a...
The Baron Of Clipperland
Baron Davis will do anything for love, but he won't do that. And by "that" I mean "be low-balled by the Golden State Warriors." Even if it means jumping ship and joining his hometown Clippers....
Jelena Jankovic Not Doing Any Splits After Today's Performance
Not a good week for highly-ranked Serbian women, as third-ranked superstar Jelena Jankovic went down in the fourth round this morning at Wimbledon. Jankovic, known for her salty toughness and her love of Lita Ford's wardrobe, was bounced by the 60th ranked player in early morning action....
The Spanish Nation Army
“I’m gonna fight ‘em off A seven nation army couldn't hold me back They’re gonna rip it off Taking their time right behind my back” – The White Stripes, “Seven Nation Army.”...
Your UEFA Euro 2008 Champs: Spain
After 44 years, Espana picks up their second Euro title and, for now, sheds their underachieving reputation. And it was a dominant run by the Spanish, not losing a game in the tournament and dispatching a tough Germany team in the final without the services of their best player....
Spain vs. Germany: Second Half
Fernando Torres is owning shit so far and Spain could be running away with this thing if Torres' first big opportunity didn't go off the goalpost. Jens Lehmann looks overmatched, which is a shocker, and right now Germany's best chances are coming on ticky tack free kicks....
Spain vs. Germany: First Half
It looks like German captain Michael Ballack is going to be playing after all, thought most of the pundits have him pegged at about 75 percent at best. David Villa remains out for Spain, which means Cesc Fabregas will probably have to come up big like he did against Russia for the Spaniards to c...
Track And Field Trials Not Shy About Producing Funny Headlines
Well met, ESPN copy editors. Yesterday, we got a "brilliant burst" of a running Hooker and today we get a Gay in heat. So salacious, these running trials. Jesuth Chritht!...
Spain vs. Italy: Extra Time
We're back live after a short intermission before the beginning of extra time. We're in for another thirty minutes of this, so get comfortable. Spain has already been peppering Italy with shots, but nothing is making its way to the goal. Silva just fired a rocket wide that would have sent chills th...