4 Page 132 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Former 49ers Tight End Brent Jones Has His Very Own (And Very Weird) Epic Poet
All we know about this is pretty much what you see in the video above: More than five minutes of Brent Jones autographing photographs at a sporting goods store while some guy reads aloud from a really detailed poem the guy presumably wrote about Jones's life and career. It's ... yeah, we don't kno...

Jamaica Set A New 4x100m Record With A Blistering 36.85 Seconds Around The Track
A Jamaican relay team anchored by Usain Bolt obliterated the world 4x100 record in running a 36.85 and holding off U.S. team that itself ran a world record-tying 37.04....

American Relay Runner Broke His Leg, Still Finished His Run
Manteo Mitchell is an American hero and a man's man. Running the opening leg of today's 4x400 qualifying heat, Mitchell felt something go in his leg. Pain? You bet. Enough pain to let down his teammates and his country? Fuck and no....

Oscar Pistorius And South African Relay Team Crash Out Of Heats, Appeal Their Way Back Into Finals
The baton never even made it into Oscar Pistorius's handicapable hand. He was waiting to run the third leg for South Africa, and could only watch as the runner ahead of him collided with a rival, both going down injured. Everyone, most of all Pistorius, believed his Olympics were over without even g...

Michael Phelps Earned His 18th Gold Medal By Bringing The 4x100 Medley Relay Team From Behind
When Michael Phelps entered the pool for his final career Olympic swim, the Japanese 4x100 medley relay team held a slight lead. When the race ended, the U.S. led by nearly two seconds....

Why Your Team Sucks 2012: San Francisco 49ers
Some people are fans of the San Francisco 49ers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the San Francisco 49ers. This 2012 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read the other Why Your Team Sucks 2012 previews here....

Ryan Lochte Wins Gold In Men's 400 Individual Medley, Michael Phelps Not On The Podium
Ryan Lochte is your winner in this evening's afternoon's 400m individual medley. Michael Phelps, the lazy bastard, did not medal in the event....

Michael Phelps, America's Laziest Olympian, Barely Qualifies For Tonight's 400 Individual Medley
We were this close (seven-hundredths of a second-close) to missing a Phelps-Lochte face-off. This guy just can't get motivated. After deciding to saunter his way through the London Olympics, participating in only seven events and not the eight he dominated in Beijing, Phelps almost wound up competi...

Why Would An Olympic Basketball Player Not Want To Lead His Team In Scoring? To Avoid Drug Testing.
Thanks to Grant Hill, another interesting piece of Olympic basketball lore has risen to the surface. Yesterday, Hill went on the Dan Patrick Show, and talked about how nobody on the 1996 Olympic basketball team wanted to be the team's leading scorer, because that person would automatically have to ...

Misspelled "Fourty Niners" Cap Marked Down To Just $15
I mean, you'd be a fool not to take advantage of this great deal at Lids. Look at that hat! It's normally $24.99, but because of a barely noticeable little thing like the team's name being spelled wrong, you can get it for more than fourty percent off. If you don't take advantage of a deal like this...

The Grierson & Leitch July 4 Extravaganza: Movies That Made Us Love America
Today and yesterday, Grierson & Leitch honors America by spotlighting films that exemplify the best our country has to offer—and the worst. Yesterday: Movies that made us feel worse about America. Today: Movies that made us love this goddamned country. ...

The Grierson & Leitch July 4 Extravaganza: Movies That Made Us Feel Crappy About America
Today and tomorrow, Grierson & Leitch honors America by spotlighting films that exemplify the best our country has to offer—and the worst. Today: Movies that made us feel worse about America. ...

Reports: 49ers Linebacker Aldon Smith Stabbed At House Party, Two Others Shot
According to team officials, the Niners linebacker is said to be recovering "comfortably" from "minor injuries." San Francisco has not elaborated any further but has said the team is in touch with the police....

Six-Year-Old Sends Brandon Jacobs $3.36 To Stay With The Giants
Brandon Jacobs is not what you would call a great running back. But that doesn't matter when you're six years old, and you attach yourself to a player for the least rational of reasons. Maybe young Joe saw Brandon Jacobs score a single touchdown on a particularly formative viewing day. Maybe Joe's p...

The 49ers Claim They Never Had Any Interest In Peyton Manning
Jim Harbaugh had about as successful a first year coaching the San Francisco 49ers as anyone could've predicted, but he also cemented his reputation as a hothead who has little respect for opposing teams and perhaps even less for the media. Ever since he flew out to North Carolina to see Peyton Mann...

Terrell Owens Says He Isn't A Deadbeat Dad, Just A Dad With A Lot Less Money
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: T.O. and his money woes....

Vernon And Vontae Davis's Younger Brother Charged With Murdering A Man With A Claw Hammer
According to various reports out of Washington, D.C., police in the nation's capital have filed first-degree murder charges against Michael W. Davis, 19, in connection with the April 24 death of a Denver tourist....

Amar'e Stoudemire To Start For Knicks In Game 4 Against Miami Heat
Less than a week after "half his hand was just hanging off" Amar'e will start for the Knicks today in what will most likely be New York's final game of the season....
![I-Team: Is This Randy Moss Trying To Open A Checking Account? [UPDATE: Yes, Sort Of]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17kwfvsv093avjpg.jpg)
I-Team: Is This Randy Moss Trying To Open A Checking Account? [UPDATE: Yes, Sort Of]
We just received the following email from a reader who wants to be called Biscuit:...

NJ Troopers Under Investigation For Escorting Brandon Jacobs's 100 MPH "Death Race"
New 49ers running back Brandon Jacobs loves him some fast cars. His collection has been featured in auto magazines, and after being booed by Giants fans in October, he responded "I've got nothing positive to say. The most positive thing: I got family at home and I got a fast-ass car being delivered ...