8 Page 87 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Do Not Rile Up The Germans
Mike Cardillo of the great That's On Point will be with you for a daily Euro 08 closer throughout the tournament....

The Drugs In Europe Must Be Great
Okay, I've been to Amsterdam. I smoked some nice pot there. They try to get you to put all this tobacco in it, but whatevs, it's good. But nothing that would make me conceive, or even understand, the opening ceremonies of EURO 2008 yesterday. This Fanhouse-provided clip is like a Bjork/Michel Gondry...

The Internet Hooligan Database Gives You Seven Stars Out of Ten For Bludgeoning
Euro 2008 gets underway today and to head off the inevitable flurry of violence that's just going to happen anyway, authorities in Switzerland have sent out letters of warning to 320 people who are listed on the country's hooligan database....

Your Euro 2008 Preview
We have lost Mr. Hirshey to the four-letter crew over in Bristol, but that doesn't mean we're gonna ignore soccer around here. Heck, that Euro 2008 business starts tomorrow — go England! Oh, wait — and we've got your back. Mike Cardillo of the great That's On Point will be with you throughout the t...

Death Looms Over Churhill Downs
The death of Eight Belles - the second place finisher in today's Kentucky Derby - makes it pretty difficult to get all that excited over Big Brown's dominating performance. The commentators love to speak of the beauty and humanity of these creatures, yet nobody seemed to mind celebrating before the ...

They're Ready to Run For the Roses
The little people are mounting their steeds, which means the most exciting two minutes in sports (setting aside the final two minutes in almost all other highly contested sporting events) can't be far behind. Oh wait, they're playing "My Old(e?) Kentucky Home. This could take a while. Hey, an ex-boy...

Olympic Torch Relay Update: We're Runnin' In Circles Here!
OK, we have a new leader for the lamest Olympic Torch Relay idea yet: In Jakarta, Indonesia on Tuesday, torch runners did laps inside of a closed stadium in order to avoid protests. Yes, in this genius move, all the Indonesian torch runners took turns running in circles, as a crowd that was hand-pi...

An Update From The Deadspin Beijing Bureau
The Olympics begin in August, and they're in China, so, you know, it should be a rather fascinating world event, if you're into fascinating world events. And we are proud to welcome back our Deadspin Beijing Bureau, our own trio of correspondents living in China and reporting on everything they see...

Jackie Chan Threatens To Chop Protesters, Make 'Rush Hour 4'
Leave it to diminutive Kung Fu dervish Jackie Chan to put this Olympic Torch protest thing into perspective. Chan, who will be a torchbearer when the relay comes to Beijing next week, says that he will deal harshly with any miscreants who might try to grab the flame from his tiny, powerful mitts....

Tainted Muffins Make Jesus Cry
Terrorist attack, or old Monty Python sketch? You be the judge: Several members of Australia's Olympic team were enjoying a batch of chocolate muffins at a Brisbane function last week, when some of the treats were found to have been sabotaged with paper clips. According to the Brisbane Times, a "maj...

Your 2008 NFL Schedule Has Arrived
It's here! It's here! And remember, in case you've just become heartsick over the fact that you've glanced over the 17 week schedule and highlighted the appropriate games that may or may not pique your pigskinned interest, ESPN is doing a 2 HOUR special about the NFL's 2008 schedule. Yes, 2 HOURS o...

Celine Dion Will Heal Olympic Rifts With Powerful Vocals
Celine Dion is about ready to choke a bitch if this Olympic boycott talk persists. Dion called on all people to "keep the dream possible for our young kids." She came to Beijing to express support for the Games after her concert in Shanghai on Friday....

You're the Immelman
It wasn't the most thrilling of finishes, but Trevor Immelman is your 2008 Masters champion regardless. Immelman, the first South African to be jacketed champion at Augusta since Gary Player in 1978, was able to protect the lead he held from the tournament's first round. Immelman's 75 wasn't all th...

Let's Get Ready to Clap Politely!
Welcome fwends, to our coverage of Sunday at the Masters. The leaders are underway, and already Immelman (-10) and Snedeker (-8) have given a stroke back to the field (which is struggling a bit itself). Continue after the jump a breakdown of the leaders and contenders, as well as an updated leaderb...

I'm Not Your Fwend, Buddy
You see, she's dressed like that because it was... raining. Forget all of that, the rain is gone and everybody is on the course in Augusta. Jim Nantz just called me his friend, so you know we're ready to go. Defending champion Zach Johnson is putting together the round of the day, but all his -4 ro...

Woodrow's Woes and Rory's Belt
Rory Sabatini will have plenty of time to do some more shopping at Hot Topic this weekend, as he became one of the top players to miss the cut at the Masters. Those who did survive the first two days at Augusta National are now underway despite a bit of atmospheric wetness. KJ Choi is already +3 fo...

Passing The Torch: Buenos Aires, You're Up
The beleaguered Olympic Torch is in Argentina today, where protesters in Buenos Aires say that they will be out in force, but will not try to snuff out the flame (wink, wink). Of course, crossing the Chinese government is one thing; but when you anger the McDonald's Corporation (pictured right), you...

Bang The Gong Slowly; Olympic Torch A No-Show In SF
San Francisco mayor Gavin Newsom didn't exactly win friends and influence people on Wednesday when he decided to play an elaborate game of Hide the Salami with the Olympic Torch. The relay's only North American stop was scheduled to be a happy, glorious people's jog from AT&T Park, down the waterfr...

It's Olympic Torch Relay Eve!
I love a good protest as much as the next person, but it seems that the bar has been set impossibly high for my home team, San Francisco. The Olympic Torch Relay makes its only North American appearance here on Wednesday, and because this is San Francisco, the world is expecting a protest on a grand...

Olympic Torch Relay Proceeding Smoothly So Far
The Olympic Torch passed through London and Paris on Sunday and earlier today, and was only snuffed out a few times by protesters: Once with a fire extinguisher. There were near riots and close to a hundred arrests. You know, I'm starting to suspect that some people don't like the Olympic Torch....