a Page 7493 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Howling Wolves And Scary Wizards Aren't Good Enough For Red Sox Nation
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Mets Get Swine Flu Scare, Creating Conditions For Tabloid Perfect Storm
A producer for the Mets television network may have swine flu, and Carlos Beltran and John Maine both have unspecified stomach ailments. Rest assured this story will be handled with measured calm and forbearance by the New York media. Wait, what's that? "Pig Panic"? Never mind. [New York Post]...
Vicente Padilla Is Good At Making People, Androids Angry
Mark Teixeira after his double-plunk from Padilla: "Unfortunately, that guy has been doing it his whole career. Every time I've faced him since there seems to be balls near my head, near my body, and today I got hit twice. There's really no reason for it." [DMN]...
Big-Bosomed Tennis Player Urged By Larger-Bosomed Volleyball Player Not To Deflate
The ongoing mini-saga of Romanian tennis star Simona Halep's decision to have breast reduction surgery has finally found one vocal female protester. Meet Alena Schurkova, a 32E-sized professional volleyball player who has gone public with her outcry....
Joyless Mike Breen Threatens To Make Boring Finals Even More Unbearable
Of the many reasons to feel generally blah about the upcoming Magic-Lakers series, there is, above all, this sad fact: Mike Breen, the only man who watches basketball and cheers for the refs, is still the voice of the NBA finals....
Brady Anderson Defends Angelos From Cruelties Of SI Article
"Meddling" Orioles owner Peter Angelos was named "The Worst Owner In Baseball" by SI. This has chafed former 50-home run fluke Brady Anderson, who penned a column for the Baltimore Sun to defend him. Some reasons why Angelos is great: he's compassionate, caring, a son of Greek immigrants. [Steady Bu...
Crazy Parents Work, But...
What do Serena Williams, Andre Agassi and Mary Pierce have in common? They all were the products of obsessive — even sociopathic — fathers and, more to the point, they enjoyed the kind of success no up-and-coming American tennis prodigy can currently boast. And maybe that's not a coincidence....
Congratulations, Cristiano Ronaldo Is Nailing Your Sister
Chelsea had a bit of a rough go of it this year, especially after losing a heartbreaker to Barcelona in the Champions League, but their Italian-Brazilian midfielder Juliano Belletti can take solace in the fact that his sister has found comfort in the arms of Man U coxswain Cristiano Ronaldo....
The New York Times Somehow Finds A Silly Reason To Loathe Yankee Stadium
Leave it to the Times — the publisher's kid, no less — to come up with one of the dumber reasons to hate the infinitely hateable Yankee Stadium: The kiddies can't get autographs anymore!...
Joe Posnanski: “I Am The Worst Thing To Come Out Of Cleveland Since Arsenio Hall”
You Cleveland fans are hurt. Angry. Confused. Annoyed. You need someone to blame for your loss. Well, will a coerced apology from Joe Posnanski do? I think it will....
Beware Jogging And Tweeting At The Same Time
Perhaps China is right to ban Twitter, not because of censorship, but because the 140-character-microblogathingy-service is dangerous. Just ask James Coleman, a well-to-do 23-year-old, the latest victim in Twitter's quest to establish its world peril. And look how innocent: A penchant for exercise w...
High School Hurlers Care Not For Your Pitch Counts
Minnesota prep player Lars Anderson threw a complete game in the high school playoffs this weekend, coming up very clutch when his team needed it most. It's even more impressive when you learn that it was 13-inning complete game and Anderson threw 201 pitches. The losing pitcher? He threw 204....
In Praise Of The Baseball All-Star Game
This is a weekly column from Leitch....
David Ortiz Is Still Worth More Than General Motors
David Ortiz's putrid 2009 numbers — .185, 1 HR, 18 RBI, 48 strikeouts — don't qualify for a government bailout, as his statistics translate to an approximate worth on the free agent market of negative $5.2 million. At least he's more valuable than Delmon Young. [Fangraphs, via Simon on Sports]...
Twitter Posts Aren't Real Journalism, Silly!
Like many newspaper reporters, Tampa Bay beat writer Rick Stroud uses Twitter to connect with his readers and talk about whatever happens to be on his mind—but if you're stupid enough to take his Twits at face value then that's your own stupid fault....
Not Even Tasers Can Stop The Gators
Florida's starting cornerback Janoris Jenkins had a brainstorm this weekend, powered by a few thousand watts of taser juice courtesy of the local police. As if that could ever slow down a Gator superstar....
Barry Bonds Was Doing This For The Kids
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Add Trannies To The List Of People Faintly Annoyed By Danica Patrick
The new Danica Patrick commercial: clever deconstruction of gender identity or grievous insult to the transgender community? Discuss. [Trans Universe, via All Left Turns]...