a Page 7971 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Phil Jackson: Greatest Coach Ever or Luckiest Schlub Of All Time?
Phil Jackson now has more NBA titles than any coach in NBA history—so he's the best coach in NBA history, right? Or could a diaper-wearing monkey win six titles with Michael Jordan on his team? Fight!...

The Chosen One Chooses Junior College
Chosen Person Bryce Harper, a rising high school junior, has elected to skip his last two years of high school, get his GED and matriculate at the College of Southern Nevada. Cue the Doogie Howser song....

Everybody Pile On D.J. Mbenga
First, Rudy Gay called him "ugly", then Reggie Miller revealed on the Dan Patrick show his text to Barkley after Lakers victory: "can you believe that DJ Mbenga and Adam Morrison have rings?"...

Plaxico Burress Saga Will Never End
Remember this guy! Captain Sweatpants? Ringing any bells? Well, you may have assumed that he was already in jail or worse (the CFL), but his trial hasn't even started yet. And now it won't until 2010! Did someone say J-E-T-S?...

It Wasn't So, Joe
Top of the eighth. Cliff Lee has just given up his first hit of the game to the Cardinals, a double to right. Up in the booth, Joe Morgan decides to tell a story. You know where this is going....

Simona Halep's Spanish Fans Form Facebook Group To Save Her "Pupus"
I have no idea what "pupus" are, but something tells me it has nothing to do with her ground stroke. [Facebook via Salir a Ganar/PHOTO: Tennisrulz/StephaneMartinache]...

Kidnappers Take Yorvit Torrealba's Son, Mock His Batting Average
All is well now that Yorvit Torrealba's son has been rescued from kidnappers in Venezuela and brought to the United States, but the hardest part of the boy's ordeal was trying defend Dad's .220 batting average to his captors....

Laker Riots Go Off Without A Hitch
Store fronts smashed? Check. Car windows stomped on? Done. Shoe store looted? You betcha. Trash cans thrown at cops? Absolutely. It's not an official championship until your downtown gets roughed up a little bit, am I right, Los Angeles?...

Brady Quinn Day At The Amusement Park Went WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Vince Young Didn't Want To Kill Himself, Vince Young Says
Michael Smith gets him to open up: "I was that hurt from the boos. All the different things that were going on, man, it was so much for me I didn't want to play no more." [E:60]...

And Here's The Best Commentary You'll See About The Lakers' Championship Anywhere
Kobe wins. Everything....

Pointless Sunday Gallery Post: Things Dangled Out of Windows
So, hi. It's Sunday. I'm tired. You're tired. Or you're probably outside, sprawled out under a sycamore, drinking lemonade, daydreaming about that pretty fish you caught one time at the big lake, as a young woman paints your toes....

Troy Aikman Soon To Be Disappointed By What Real World Has To Offer
The former Cowboys/UCLA quarterback marched with the Bruins during their graduation ceremony yesterday. It took 21 years, but Aikman finally has a Sociology degree, which makes him qualified to wait tables anywhere in America. [ESPN/JerseyChaser]...

Exit Music For An Acta
SI.com reports Manny Acta's time managing the Washington Natinals will be over soon. President Stan Kasten won't confirm or deny that report, only saying that he's "perplexed" by the abysmal 16-43 record, which probably means he's done....

This Photo Is Much Better For A Sunday Morning Than The Other Option
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Jim Calhoun Is Unbreakable
12 miles into his charity bike race for cancer research, UConn's 67-year-old head coach hit a pot hole, fell, and broke five ribs. After he crossed the finish line, he fainted from dehydration and was hospitalized. Out today, though. [NYDN]...

Team Iraq Will Be Your Soccer Darling Tomorrow
There's some type of non-American football tournament commencing in South Africa tomorrow as an appetizer to the World Cup. And, look, there's Iraq. Wave to them!...

Don't Ask Marian Hossa For Stock Market Advice
The dogpile on Marian Hossa has been sufficient and thorough. The Wings beat Hossa's Penguins last year. Then the Penguins beat Hossa's Red Wings. Goat cheese....

Iowa High School Umpire Knows How To Clear A Room
High school baseball umpires have a lot of options in handling disputes. They can give teams warnings, ask the audience to control themselves ... or just throw everyone out of the game....

The LPGA's Melting Pot Of The Future, TODAY!
The ethnic composition of womens golf is what the US will be in 2042, when Michelle Wie will have a really good feeling about winning her first major. [Waggle Room]...