a Page 7973 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Tim Donaghy Has Not Been Enjoying Prison (UPDATED)
Disgraced referee Tim Donaghy will be released from prison next week and not a moment too soon. A press release says that while in the slammer he nearly had his legs broken by a New York mobster. (Update below.)...

If The Nationals Lose But No One Is Around To See It, Do They Still Lose?
Nationals Park looked slightly emptier than usual last night, with less than 100 fans sticking around to weather a two-hour ninth inning rain delay. But boy, did they get a good fireworks show afterward — oh, wait. [Washington Post]...

Driver Of Nick Adenhart's Car Was Also Drunk
A toxicology report on Courtney Stewart, the young woman who was killed along with Angels pitcher Nick Adenhart in an April car crash, reveals that Stewart—who was behind the wheel of Adenhart's car—was legally drunk at the time....

No One Is Reading The A-Rod Book
This is just cold: "As of Wednesday afternoon, the book ranked No. 2,904 on Amazon.com, where even James Frey's discredited memoir A Million Little Pieces- at 1,776 - is outselling it." Another "W" for Howard Rubenstein! [USA Today]...

Cristiano Ronaldo Will Also Accept Large Piles Of Real Madrid's Cash
Just days after Kaka broke the world transfer record by going from AC Milan to Real Madrid, his new squad plunked down another $131 million to take Cristiano Ronaldo away from Manchester United. They are—how you say?—living large....

Evgeni Malkin Is Here To Steal Your Girlfriend (Updated Update)
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Well, At Least He'll Be Able To Tell People He Was Coach Of The Year...
Mike Brown, the Cleveland Cavaliers dapper head coach, may have spent his last season with Lebron James. Again, blame this on Joe Posnanski. [ProBasketballNews]...

Adam Morrison Spotted Lurking The Sidelines In My Easter Outfit; Free Beer For Readers
Well, this was a pleasant surprise from last night. Adam Morrison wanders into the huddle, sporting his G.I. Jane haircut and with the delightfully dim expression that's plagued most of his NBA career to this point....

REMETEE Owner Passes Up Opportunity To Humiliate Desperate Women On National Television
Fact: Ryan Braun was asked to be on "The Bachelor." Fact: He said 'no thanks.' [Wisn.com]...

UCLA QB Announces Transfer Via Bizarre Press Release
Fact: A redshirt sophomore named Chris Forcier is leaving UCLA to play ball at Furman. Fact: His family decided to announce the move with one of the more batshit loony press releases you'll ever read....

Little League Coach Teaches Fundamentals Of Breaking And Entering
A Little League coach in Washington State was arrested for burglary after enlisting kids from his team—including his own son—to help him break into an empty shop. The haul? Overhead lights and bolts. What a mastermind....

Jason Whitlock's Too Black For Kansas City Sometimes
Whitlock's latest KC Star column features D.J. Jazzy Jeff, KC's eight-block "P & L District," Kangol hats, and, of course, racism. Just another Saturday night with Whitlock in the Midwest....

Stan Van Gundy A "Working-Class Hero," Says Newspaper For Rich People (UPDATE)
There is no worse fate for an NBA final than to be turned into a roundtable discussion on the brilliance of the coach. Someone please tell the Wall Street Journal: Stan Van Gundy is not the reason people are watching....

NHL Did Not Rig The Stanley Cup Finals
Conspiracy theorists are apoplectic after learning that Red Wings' 2009 Stanley Cup Championship gear is already available for sale on the NHL website, but the cooler heads at Puck Daddy have already proven that the Penguins got the same treatment....

The Washington Huskies Revival Will Be Led By Joe Montana's Son
Tough call for Nick Montana: Charlie Weis' Notre Dame or winless Washington? Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, catch a Huskie by the toe, my father told me to pick the best one and that is Y-O-U-W. [Seattle Times]...

Hey There, Manny, Nice To Hear From You
Oh, Manny. Hiding in the Green Monster, cutting off cutoffs, popping women's fertility drugs and, on Tuesday, surprising everyone by showing up in the Dodgers clubhouse. Well that's not exactly allowed, ESPN's Buster Olney reports....

America's Verdict On Bud Selig's Draft Performance: "Boring LOL"
Poor Bud Selig can't walk in front of a camera without inspiring a visceral sort of loathing among, well, everyone. Case in point: last night, the baseball amateur draft's primetime debut....

Free Fenway Tickets To The Person Who Loves America The Most
Do you want presumably good seats to a Red Sox game at Fenway? All you have to do is convince the son of a failed presidential candidate that you hate socialism—and maybe make a small donation!...

The Struggles Of A Reformed Football Stud (UPDATE)
Robert Lunn is a former defensive tackle from UConn. He graduated in 2008 and is now playing professional football — in Pörtschach, Austria. He's graciously shared some of the things he's experienced so far....

Brad Childress Is Full Of Crap
Brad Childress came out of hiding today to complain about all those unscrupulous reporters and their unnamed sources who make up lies about Brad Childress and create nothing but trouble. Trouble he could end in two seconds if he'd just pick up the phone....