a Page 8074 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
George W. Bush Leaves Office Without Helping Roger Clemens
No pardon for The Rocket. Clemens adds W. to list of "dushbags" out to get him. [NYDN]...
Presidential Smack Talk With Kevin Johnson
Terrible: With two million people at the inauguration you have to figure at least one of them would be a Steeler fan. [Mondesi's House]...
The French Judge Gives Them A 10
Something that wasn't mentioned in Tuesday's inaugural address: The Russians are way ahead of us in boob slip technology. (Following link NSFW)....
Congratulations On Your New Acquisition, Boston!
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Does Ray-Ray Want To Be A Cowboy?
"Dallas owner Jerry Jones believes his team is in the serious hunt for a Super Bowl title next season, and thinks Lewis would be a help in the Cowboys locker room." [Ravens Insider]...
Hope. Change. Buzzsaw Tattoos.
This is the Mighty Jim Cooke sketch of what will be placed on my upper right buttock very soon. No red birds, no shooting flames — just buzzsaw....
Arizona Dismisses Confused, Drunk Mascot
The Diamondbacks fired their mascot because of a DUI arrest and not, as suspected, because bobcats are not snakes. [AZ Republic]...
Rod Marinelli's Long Goodbye
Rod Marinelli's final words to the members of the Detroit media: "Goodbye, ladies." Well played, my friend. Well played. [ProFootballTalk]...
David and Victoria Show Off Their New Uniforms
Get Bent: No wonder the Beckham's careers are suffering. It's a lot of hard work to be this damn sexy. [Sports Crackle Pop]...
Rinku And Dinesh Tap Barry Bonds For Insight Into Mysterious "Pirates city"
"Rinku and I going Barry Bonds house. We talking Barry Bonds sir about Pirates city. [W]e learning Willie Stargell, Dave Parker, Roberto Clemente. We learning coaches. We liking Barry Bonds best." [The Million Dollar Arm]...
Claude Lemieux Comes Out Of His Shell
Claude Lemieux—who is 43 and hasn't played an NHL game is six years—will suit up for the San Jose Sharks tonight. Ahh, the memories....
Chicago Wants A Second Terrible Football Franchise
This is what happens when you have two weeks of down time to fill, but it's somehow still football season. Crazy mayors get crazy ideas and people (like me) pretend to take them seriously....
St. Louis High-Sticks Their Way Into America's Heart
After missing two chances at an empty net in the final minute, the Bruins allowed the Blues to skate back down into their zone and put the puck in the net to miraculously tie the game with under a second to go. Ok, maybe David Backes' stick was a wee bit high when he batted the puck out of the air, ...
Humble Minnesota Figure Skater Wants To Remind People How Pretty She Is
"My eyes are large, my lips full, my legs long. Many have told me that I should be a model. Some have even told me that I have an exotic, European look." [RandBall]...
The Buzzsaw That Is The Super Bowl
It seems my beloved teams are making a habit out of this Ridiculous Postseason Run business. In retrospect, it was the only way it could have gone down....
Bill Self Explains Him...self
Kansas is "looking into" Bill Self's possibly illegal contact with star recruit John Wall, who probably won't go to Kansas anyway, because who wants to play for cheaters? [AP/Google]...
Kirk Radomski Has No Doubt That Roger Clemens Is Lying Through His Pustules
Kirk Radomski's new book "Bases Loaded" is about his life as a high-end dope dealer for major league players. A large chunk of his promotional tour appears to be knee-capping Roger Clemens....
Lance Armstrong Pushes Legs Down, Then Back Up, Repeats
Hero velocipeddler Lance Armstrong self-powers his bi-wheeled cycle for several hours, wins accolades beyond the realm of most men's dreams. [The Australian]...
Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: "Blood In The Cage"
In his new book, "Blood in the Cage, SI writer L. Jon Wertheim examines the furious rise of the UFC and mixed martial arts fighting....
What The Heck... Let's Have A Lacrosse Fight
Yes, I'm making fun of lacrosse players, because it's easy and blindsiding unsuspecting opponents with your shoulder doesn't make you a football player. Dropping the gloves and slugging it out doesn't make you a hockey player either, but it is still entertaining....