a Page 8092 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Spanish Soccer Star Would Like To Show You His Pimp Ring
Real Madrid's Sergio Ramos is here to remind all you kids out there that yes, racism is cruel and unfair, but it can also be fun!...
John Smoltz Heading To Boston (Of Course)
After 20 years in Atlanta, the 41-year-old pitcher is signing with the Red Sox, who presumably will place him in a bullpen rocking chair to spin yarns about Tom Glavine and the Old South. [MLB.com]...
Who is The Fiend Who Stole JoePa's Glasses?
APB, State College, Pa., Police Department: All units be on the lookout for anyone wearing pair of thick, bronze glasses. Suspect may also be wearing a USC sweatshirt....
Kings Rookie Hazings Tend To Be Delicious
Maybe next time Sacramento Kings rookie Jason Thompson will bring the bagels. Or at least some hot butter. [Sactown Royalty]...
Dennis Rodman Finds The Role He Was Born To Play
• Based on a true story: There is an actual movie about a midget basketball team playing against full-size people, with Dennis Rodman as "Himself." Just let that sink in for a minute. [SbB]...
J.C. Romero Situation Gives Deputized Met Fan Reason To Complain
Yes, recently suspended pitcher J.C. Romero did work in (and win) two World Series games this year. Once again, Dan, strident Mets fan, has emailed in his thoughts....
ESPN Snitches On Pacman, Costs Him His Job
It turns out that the release of Adam Jones last night was not just another ho-hum personnel move involving a nuisance player. There's a brand new legal situation that Dallas wants no part of....
Krzyzewski Talks In Third Person; Duke Beats Davidson
Blue Devils coach: “All was good in Krzyzewskiville. And then, all of a sudden, the clouds came.” [NBCSports]...
One Final Olympics Retrospective, If We May (With NSFW Jumpness)
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Will Yankees Luxury Suite Controversy Topple Bloomberg Administration?
City sells luxury Yankee Stadium seats, parking passes back to team for cash. Guillotines being constructed outside City Hall. [New York Times]...
Happy Birthday (And R.I.P), Dear Old Black Table
Six years ago today the internet heaved the mighty Black Table upon an unsuspecting internet nation, so it's my duty to pay respect....
Game Over: Cowboys Cut Pacman Jones
Kind of ironic that a fight with a member of his own security detail may have signaled the end for Pacman Jones, who was cut today by the Cowboys. Well, there's always Oakland. [NFL Fanhouse]...
Of Course Eli Manning's Wife Would Start Getting Frisky To "Single Ladies"
You'd figure that Page Six would have surveillance video of the alleged Eli/Abby lapdance like they did for Antonio Pierce. Alas....
The Browns Are Eric Mangini's Problem Now
The Cleveland Browns have come to terms with deposed Jets head coach Eric Mangini, and will formerly announce his hiring on Thursday. And Romeo Crennel may be staying around as well!...
Bill James Dismantles The BCS Computers
The world's greatest stat nerd explains why the BCS computer "rankings" are a complete farce and why any mathematician who participates in it should be ashamed of themselves. But who is he betting on? [Slate]...
Sam Bradford Totally Jinxed By NFL Draft Report
"Sources have told us that Sam Bradford, barring an injury in Thursday night’s BCS National Championship, will declare for the NFL Draft." Good luck tomorrow, buddy! [National Football Post]...
ESPN Trots Out "Quite Frankly" For Old White People
Awful Announcing reveals that Rick Reilly will finally get the consistent face-time to justify his $17 million ESPN contract. America, lock up your Ed Hardy T-shirts and your dental metaphors because "Homecoming" is here....
New Jersey Senator Demands You T Up Those Cheerleaders
Governing a large state like New Jersey takes a special kind of politician, one with an iron will and mighty intelligence. Nothing can derail his mission ... except 11-year-old cheerleaders!...
Joel Przybilla's Extended Family Is Not Cool With David Stern's Stupid Fines
Portland Trailblazer Joel Przybilla was fined $7,500 for this altercation with Tyson Chandler last week. For comment on this momentous national story, the media naturally turned to the 83-year-old grandmother of Przybilla's wife....
Time To Hide The Sausage
• Nightmare Ant weeps: Wow, those small Western athletic conferences really take their mascots seriously. Oh, I'm sorry, maybe that should have read: "really don't take their mascots seriously." [Storming The Floor]...