a Page 8165 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Mike Tyson Will Eat Your Children, And Anything Else That Isn't Nailed Down
It's clear that whomever plays Mike Tyson in a movie about his life is going to have to go the Robert De Niro route and gain a hundred pounds for the later scenes....

Maybe He Should Change His Name To Phil Dawsome
When asked how it felt to eclipse the franchise record for most field goals in a season, Phil Dawson, kicker of the 4-10 Cleveland Browns, said: "There's an old saying back in Texas that says, 'You know that white speck on top of chicken poop? It's still chicken poop.' " [Philly.com](bottom graph)...

Hannah Storm Pulls Out All The Stops
• Captivating: The one day I miss SportsCenter and Hannah Storm starts dressing Daisy Duke. It was only on for 14 hours yesterday so it was pretty easy to miss. [Not a Sports Blog]...

Beckham Happens To Have The Kind Of Body That Excites Both Persuasions
I must admit that half the fun of this job is in reading the British tabloid headlines. Today's winner: AC Star: I'll Peek In Beck's Kecks....

Joe Paterno Continues To Age In Reverse
JoePa gets three-year contract extension from Penn State. Grim Reaper throws down scythe in disgust; Nittany Lion pours himself another cocktail. [NBCSports]...

Plaxico Is Gonna Need A Bigger Boat!
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

The Cruel Emasculation Of Josh Howard
Everybody remembers when Josh Howard brought some unwanted attention to the Mavericks for going rogue on Michael Irvin's radio show by extolling the virtues of weed and admitted smoking it during the off-season....

Your 2009 Pro Bowl Rosters
All Cardinals, all the time on the NFC. On the AFC, I just hope Brett Favre remembers which uniform is the same as his. [NFL.com]...

Mets To Be Rescued By The Power Of Booze And Mr. Celery?
Long Island Booze Baron Martin Silver is riding to the rescue to buy the New York Mets, whom he's sure are broke, so that they "don't fall into the wrong hands." Like, with someone who doesn't taunt people with poultry?...

Braylon Edwards May Have Worn Out His Welcome In Cleveland
Cleveland is awful and their offense hasn't scored in 16 quarters, but everyone just stay calm. You don't hear Braylon Edwards crying about it....

ESPN Said "Shuttlecock"
• It's still a sports site, right?: ESPN's "Mayne Street" continues to baffle and confound—and also offend a little bit. [The Sports Culture]...

Area Girlfriend Is Seriously Cramping Penguin Fan's Style
Ok, fess up. Which one of you Penguin fans out there is the subject of this letter submitted to advice columnist Margo Howard?...

Mets Broke Due To Madoff Scandal? Let's Do The Math
Forgive New York Mets fans if they're not swelling with pride over being connected to one of the biggest investment frauds in the history of money. But will the Madoff Scandal affect the Mets' ability to sign players?...

Robert Flores: The Tony Danza Of SportsCenter
ESPN afternoon SportsCenter anchor Robert Flores took some time to answer my moronic email questions. He's good like that....

Ed Werder Speaks Fondly of T.O.
"I was shocked," Werder said. "I've been covering the Cowboys since 1989 and I have never been put in a position like that. It was a first." When the two saw each other in the post-game news conference, Werder reports, "He called me a name but it wasn't a profanity." [DMN's Sports Meda Blog]...

Auburn Rallies The Troops To Defend Gene Chizik
As you may have heard, the Gene Chizik hiring was not well received in parts of Alabama. But with denial and anger out of the way, some of the Auburn faithful are ready to bargain....

Kendra Wilkinson Ensures Hank Baskett Will Not Have Any Friends In Eagles' Locker Room
Delightfully dim Playmate Kendra Wilkinson is giving her fiancee, Eagles' wide receiver Hank Baskett, a good indication of what kind of headaches he'll have to suffer through the rest of his life once they become legally married and bound together forever....

Grierson And Leitch, At The Movies
When I was in high school, I wanted to be Roger Ebert when I grew up....

Andy Pettitte's Secret Santa
Who is the "mystery team" offering Andy Pettitte three years and $36 million? Let me ride my unicorn over to my crystal ball to find out. [NJ.com]...

A Night Out With (A Presumably Unarmed) Plaxico
Here's Plaxico Burress, looking none the worse for wear — but sitting down, of course — at Kevin Powell’s 8th Annual Holiday Party and Clothing Drive at the Madison nightclub on Friday night....