aba Page 145 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Hockey, Wearing Not So Much As A Stanley Cup
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Phillies, Angels Team Up To Stop Yankees
A simple error by the MLB web team or wishful thinking by our Buddy Bud? Or is C.C. Sabathia so intimidating it takes the Angels lineup and all four Philly starters to bring him down?...

It's John Wooden's 99th Birthday
And to commemorate, Esquire.com's re-run his "What I've Learned" interview with Cal Fussman from February, 2000. Here's some sage advice from the legendary UCLA coach we can all benefit from: "Pick up your own orange peels."[Esquire.com]...

White Trash Rebels Fans Would Like To See This Man Dead Over White Trash Comments
The SEC is littered with pugnacious rivalries, and one Bama'-banged Zabka named Taylor Fortenberry created his usual trash-talk video before this week's Ole Miss clash. Unfortunately, now Ole Miss fans want to kill him. Dead. For real....

Alabama Father Pleased Daughter's Domestic Dispute Won't Interfere With Football Season
Alabama linebacker Courtney Upshaw and his girlfriend both agreed to dismiss charges filed against the other after a lover's spat this summer. No one is more excited about this than the girl's father who exited the courthouse shouting, "Roll Tide!"...

Zombie Pat Tillman Would Be Playing For Bill Belichick Right Now, Peter King Reports
In March 2003, the United States embarked on a misbegotten and illegitimate war in Iraq that would have profound and sadly irrevocable consequences on ... the 2005 NFL free-agent market. So says Peter King....

Ford Field Pants Dropper Can Totally Explain This
As you would probably expect, when one dude is caught on camera choking out another dude who isn't wearing pants the natural response is usually, "It's not what you think!" Well, the gentleman on top has finally spoken up....

Binghamton Zoo Doesn't Appreciate The Comparisons To That "Blight" Of A Basketball Team
The Binghamton University basketball program has had its share of image problems thanks to many of the off-field indiscretions of its players, but don't you dare compare those animals to the ones in the actual zoo....

Lions Fan Enjoys Historic Victory Sans Pants
Detroit fans have suffered through eons of metaphorical de-pantsings, so it's understandable that a few dudes attending Sunday's monumental victory would look to continue the tradition by literally dropping trou during a drunken game of grab-ass....

Lenny Dykstra Now Reduced To Stealing From Wayne Gretzky
Dykstra may not have a wad of cash anymore, but at least he has two multi-million dollar homes. Whoops! Seems he's been banned from entering those, because Nails has been stealing anything not nailed down....

Lenny Dykstra's Entire Career Is Now Up For Sale
The "Flying Higher" Kid is auctioning off pretty much every piece of memorabilia from his baseball career, including his 1986 World Series ring. I didn't notice exactly when it happened, but this story has officially crossed line into "sad." [NYDN/BusinessInsider]...

Does Miguel Cabrera Need a Valtrex Prescription?
Wow, that's a grody canker, isn't it? Anyway, Michigan and Notre Dame are still battling it out and USC and Ohio State comes later, so consider this your open thread. And oh, I have a fun story for y'all!...

Mark Whicker Has Left The Yard Before
The year was 1991. Journalist and ex-Marine Terry Anderson had just been freed after nearly seven years of captivity in Lebanon. Seven years is a long time. Luckily, a columnist named Mark Whicker was around to put it in perspective....

If Ya Can't Beat Em, Dress Up Like A Lady
So the saying goes. Here's rookie fuck David Price, preparing to "work his rookie magic" in the South Bronx after last night's 4-2 loss at Yankee stadium. [ESPN]...

Alabama Fan Is Not Pleased About That Last Call
Not only did college football return to us last weekend, it brought back a classic genre of the YouTube age—the overstimulated SEC fan boiling over with rage as they watch their team fail on TV....

Mark Whicker Leaves The Yard
I do not say this lightly: What you're about to read is the single worst piece of sports journalism ever committed to the page....

Rampage Jackson Ditches Upcoming Bout to Star in A-Team Movie
I wonder which character he'll play?...

Jeff Jagodzinski Has Not Had A Good Year
Tampa Bay has not even seen their new offense in real-time competition yet, but they have apparently seen enough to know that it stinks. They fired coordinator Jeff Jagodzinski today, just one week before Opening Day....

Tampa Bay Rays Employee Takes It Upon Himself To Keep Playoff Hopes Alive
And the best way to possibly do that is to plant a fake bomb as a "practical joke" in Tropicana Field before the Red Sox series. The Rays are still six games back in the AL Wild Card race. [StPeteTimes]...

A Rough Night For Alabama High School Football
A head coach and a referee died in two separate incidents during the opening night of high school football in Alabama on Friday....