aba Page 85 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Your National Championship Game <i>Tecmo Super Bowl</i> Simulation Is Live
Clemson. Alabama. Tecmo Super Bowl. The simulation is LIVE:...
Clemson Director Of Sports Medicine Not Into Scientific Studies, Very Into Knee Braces
Tonight, millions will tune in to watch two very good college football teams play again for the national championship. There will be Ben “I Love Butts” Boulware, no Lane Kiffin, and lots of knee braces on uninjured fat guys. ...
Jabari Parker's Shorts Game Is Extremely Strong
Get a load of this cool motherfucker:...
Lane Kiffin Says He's Too Focused On Making FAU A Playoff Team To Coach In Title Game
Monday, Alabama announced via a Nick Saban statement that new FAU head coach Lane Kiffin will not join the Crimson Tide on the sideline or in the booth as offensive coordinator for its upcoming rematch with Clemson in the national title game. Given the curious timing and Kiffin’s tendency to wear on...
Alabama Ditches Lane Kiffin One Week Before Championship Game
Alabama offensive coordinator Lane Kiffin will be the head coach at FAU next season, but he continued to serve as Alabama’s OC during Saturday’s playoff game against Washington. It was assumed that he would do the same during next week’s championship game, but head coach Nick Saban just announced th...
What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
OK, so you’ve already learned about all the things we shoved inside ourselves last year. But what about our dangly bits? Rest assured, we punished them....
OM NOM NOM
Sark takes over for Lane Kiffin in running Alabama’s offense next year, and I think he’ll fit in just fine....
Jabari Parker Is Turning Into A Nice Sidekick For Giannis Antetokounmpo
If not for the fact that he shares the floor with a lovable 6-foot-11 point squid, Jabari Parker would get a lot more of our affection. Last night he feasted on the Pistons for 31 points, nine rebounds, and seven assists:...
Doug Martin Will Enter Drug Treatment Facility
Buccaneers RB Doug Martin revealed that he failed a drug test and will serve a four-game suspension, and announced that he’s entering rehab....
What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?<em></em><em></em>
Deadspin’s Christmas Day tradition returns. It is time to sound the depths of the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission’s database of emergency room visits. Below are the strangest, most awkwardly shaped, and least pleasant objects that America has shoved into its various holes. God bless us, eve...
One Player Helped Get Both Goalies Knocked Out Of The Red Wings-Lightning Game
It’s not a good night for goalies in Tampa. First came an injury to Lightning goaltender Ben Bishop, on a seemingly routine save of a shot from rookie Nick Jensen in the first period. Though the play seemed innocuous enough, Bishop soon left the game, and the team later announced that he was out wit...
The Bucs' Defense Finally Figured Things Out, And Now It's Scary
Wait. How are the Buccaneers 8-5 and currently in line for the NFC’s second wild-card spot? Weren’t they once 1-3 and giving up more points than any team in the NFL? Was that really this season? And wasn’t it just six weeks ago that Matt Ryan and the Falcons did this to the Bucs in prime time, which...
Lane Kiffin Got What He Deserved
The new FAU head coach said it best during his introductory press conference: “You don’t get what you want, you get what you deserve.”...
Here Are Your College Football Playoff Matchups
ESPN has revealed the matchups for the third annual College Football Playoff. No. 1 Alabama will face No. 4 Washington, and No. 2 Clemson has No. 3 Ohio State. Both games will be played on December 31, with the final on January 9 in Tampa....
J.T. Brown Fights Ryan Ellis, Gets Heckled, Punches Heckler's Phone
J.T. Brown is here to fight, man. After getting blindsided to the ice by Predators defenseman Ryan Ellis, Brown rolled over on top of him and started pummeling him like he was finishing up an MMA knockout. Both men were sent to the penalty box to sit out the dregs of the Predators’ blowout win over ...
That's Not How You Football
The Chiefs grabbed a first-quarter turnover as Buccaneers quarterback Jameis Winston lost his faculties—and the football....
They Won 31-3
Nick Saban wasn’t pleased with his team’s first-half performance tonight against Chattanooga. Can you tell?...
Mike Evans Has Already Caved On His National Anthem Protest
That was short-lived. ...