abe Page 33 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bear Plays Tennis
The Deadspin tips line received an email today with this subject: Bear Playing Tennis. It was a thrilling possibility. A bear playing tennis? You just don't see that everyday. We were prepared to make a lot of half-assed rapture jokes about it....

The Bears Forgot To Report Their Draft-Day Trade, So It Never Went Through
Not a huge fuckup, as far as draft-day fuckups go, not like a Christian Ponder-level fuckup, but a fuckup nonetheless. When time ran out on Baltimore's 26th round pick, and the Chiefs leapfrogged them in the order, everyone assumed it was the Ravens that dropped the ball. But no, it was Jerry Angelo...

What Does The Splinter Group Of Players Mean For The Lockout?
A group about 70 less rich, less famous NFL players are about to hire their own law firm to get them a seat at the bargaining table. What does this mean? Like everything else in tightlipped lockout land, who the fuck knows? But here's our best interpretation....

How These Two White Guys Wound Up In This Kendrick Perkins Family Photo
Like most white guys from suburban Boston, half-brothers Brian Johnson and Justin Tsouros had never hung out with an NBA player. So when they arrived at the condo in Waltham, Mass., one evening in the fall of 2007, they didn't quite know what to expect. The place was dark. The blinds were drawn. But...

The Sultan Of Twat: Babe Ruth's Swinging First Few Years With The Yankees
The following is excerpted from Weintraub's The House That Ruth Built, about Babe Ruth, the Yankees, and the 1923 baseball season....

This Is The Saddest Image To Come Out Of The Sad WNBA Draft
The 2011 WNBA draft, held at 3 p.m. on a Monday, is now wrapping up. No shockers here: the Minnesota Lynx selected UConn's Maya Moore (projected during the draft to be the league MVP) with the first pick, 6'8" Australian Elizabeth Cambage was second overall and will play for Tulsa, and Courtney Vand...

This Year's "One Shining Moment" Includes Very Few Moments From The Title Game
Your morning roundup for April 5, the day Michael Jackson took watch over Fulham FC's stadium....

Elizabeth Taylor, As Remembered By Fake Robert Evans
In light of the recent passing of Hollywood screen icon Liz Taylor, we asked legendary Hollywood producer and Jamboroo contributor Robert Evans to join us to share some of his fondest memories of the actress. Take it away, Mr. Evans....

LeBron James Turned The Atlanta Hawks Into The Cleveland Cavaliers For 12 Minutes
Your morning roundup for March 19, the day after it became wise to snatch a few domain names ending in ".xxx"....

The Messy History Of Charlie Sheen's "Winning" Ring
As part of his relentless media odyssey this week, Charlie Sheen introduced himself to Twitter with a message that had a Chappelle-esque, "Kiss the rings, bitches" quality to it. It was an image of Sheen's shimmering 1927 World Series ring that was once worn by another winner with an equally insatia...

Last Night's Winner: The D.C. TV Guy Who Obliterated Dan Snyder On Air
Dan Snyder's legal action against Washington City Paper, publisher of "The Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," has dominated D.C.-area news this week. Much has been said about Snyder, but Channel 9 sports anchor Brett Haber said it best last night....

Soccer Could See Its First Photoshop-Related Fine
Soccer players: they're just like us! Liverpool's Ryan Babel could face discipline for Tweeting this photoshopped picture of the ref wearing a Manchester United jersey after a controversial FA Cup match yesterday. He should be suspended, if only for using "SMH." [Guardian]...

Insane Scramble, Hail Mary Win HS Championship
Facing fourth-and-19, with two minutes left in California's D-III title game, Kingsburg needed a miracle. It would be their second one of the year....

Crazy Old Coots Still Bemoaning Felix Hernandez's Cy Young Award
Joe Morgan may be gone, but his ignorant spirit lives on. Murray Chass and Phil Rogers wonder how in the world Hernandez could be the best pitcher if he didn't have the most wins. Yes, we're still having this damn discussion....

Notre Dame Won't Talk About Woman Who Killed Herself After Reporting Football Player Sexually Assaulted Her
At the end of August, 19-year-old Elizabeth "Lizzy" Seeberg told [university] police that a Notre Dame football player sexually assaulted her. Nine days later, she killed herself. And what has the university said about it in the months since?...

Manny Pacquiao, Cam Newton Or A Bull In Edmonton: Who Was The Biggest Winner?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Moneyball Comes To England
Liverpool fans are worried that their new American owners will try to win on the cheap, replete with columnists fulminating about how statistics can't measure "temperament, courage, dedication." Someone needs to start up a Fire David Pleat blog. [Guardian, h/t Joey]...

Here's Audio Of That ESPN U Reporter Getting Pranked And Wrecking Her Hotel Room (NSFW)
Last week, Elizabeth Moreau was the victim of a prank in which she was prevailed upon to break a window in her hotel room, among other things. Here's a snippet. Head over to The Smoking Gun to listen to the whole thing....

ESPN Reporter Falls For Hoax, Busts Up Hotel Room
Elizabeth Moreau was in a Gainesville hotel to cover a UF volleyball game for ESPNU, when she got a phone call. Hijinks definitely ensued....

Last Night's Winner: Buster Posey's Seasoning
Posey happened all over the place yesterday—4-for-5 and a play at home that was something like full-contact jai alai—and it reminded us that once, before the media began handing out Fields Medals and MacArthur Grants, Brian Sabean was an idiot....