ac Page 1019 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

So Long Ochocinco, And Thanks For The Sombrero
While Chad Ochocinco was thanking God for sending him to New England (or more likely just getting him out of Cincinnati), his now ex-teammate Pacman Jones was helping himself to the contents of Ochocinco's locker. That included modeling the sombrero Chad once pulled out on the field and offering up ...

Once Upon A Time, A.C. Green, David Robinson, And Barry Sanders Made An Abstinence Video Together
If you, too, are "down with the honeys" and "the s-word," then consider heeding their early-90s call....

Serie A Owner Storms Out Of Scheduling Meeting In Most Dramatic, Italian Way Ever
Aurelio De Laurentiis, the owner and savior of the soccer club S.S.C. Napoli, is also a successful Italian film producer in his native country. So we can forgive him for his penchant for the theatrical. But mio dio, his reaction to next season's Serie A fixtures was one for the ages. ...

The Million-Dollar Monaco Fender-Bender
Mercedes, Ferrari, Porsche, Bentley, Aston Martin — five great tastes that don't go together when you smash them all together like a little kid playing with toy cars. Of course this went down in Monte Carlo, which combines all the pretentiousness of Vegas with all the pretentiousness of France....

We Hope This Near-Death Experience Also Marks The Death Of Planking
Please, world, let us be done with planking. It has gone too far. People are now falling off of the top of golf carts and then nearly getting run over by said golf carts. A person has actually died. Soon, our pets' heads will be falling off....

BREAKING: Hall Of Famer, Admitted T-Shirt Thief Roberto Alomar Will Return The T-Shirt He Stole
Perhaps you read our story earlier today, of Blue Jays fans Fiyaz Kanji and Owais Farooqui, who made the pilgrimage to Cooperstown this weekend to see Roberto Alomar enter the Hall. But during the parade, Alomar took the $50 t-shirt that belonged to Kanji....

Where NFL Rumors Are Born, Pat Devlin Is In The Details
We got an email last night from "prism" with the subject line: How Sports Media Blows, and it was a series of links in chronological order....

Pac-12 Releases A Highfalutin Hype Video That Arizona State Students Won't Be Able To Understand
We've provided here the full transcription of the purplest and most thesaurus-dependent prose to ever grace a promotional video for a college football conference. College football is back, you guys. Let me rephrase that: college football is back with "an avant garde redesign of the competitive bal...

Guess Who Arrived First For Broncos Practice Today?
At 8:01 this morning: "Tim Tebow. Of course." [@AdamSchefter]...

Nixon's Nightmare Was Brought To Life At The White House Today
The world champion San Francisco Giants, accompanied by Willie Mays, visited the White House today, in all their scraggly, bearded glory. President Obama made jokes about Brian Wilson's beard ("I do fear it"), his attire ("Now underneath Brian's beard, and the spandex tuxedo, and the sea captain cos...

My Frustrating Sexting Sessions With Ron Artest
At first, I thought Ron Artest, the man you may now know as Metta World Peace, and I could become friends. Blame my naivete, ego, or optimism, but I really thought this could be platonic....

Jay Cutler Re-Lists Himself As Single On Facebook (UPDATE: Fraudulence!)
(Ed note: NBC now retracts their earlier report, confirming that the Cutler Facebook page was a fake. I'll leave this post up so you can point and laugh at me.)...

MMA Sexpot Gina Carano Is Starring In A Soderbergh Movie With A Bunch Of Real Actors
A lot of female MMA fighters don't like Gina Carano because they don't look like Gina Carano. Well, shoot. The world ain't fair. Carano hasn't fought in over two years, when she got the bejeezus beat out of her by Cristiane "Cyborg" Santos. Yet Carano has leveraged her pretty face into a pretty sw...

Eric Wedge's Mustache Tweets From The Dead
From an iPhone, no less. When the Mariners' losing streak reached 14 games Saturday night, manager Eric Wedge made the "drastic" decision to shave his 'stache, thinking it might help with karma or whatever. It didn't, as Seattle lost again to Boston yesterday. The People Against Eric Wedge's Mustac...

Kevin Durant Is Not Ashamed Of His "Business" Tats
News broke last week that Kevin Durant, the humble 22-year-old who also happens to be a professional basketball player, is extremely tatted up. The Thunder blog over at The Oklahoman has some specifics on Durant's ink, which — if you could not already tell from the careful placement — he covers up i...

Mike Vick Tweets That He'd Be Honored To Have Favre Back Him Up, Then Tweet Disappears
You'll recall this, Howard Eskin's report that the Eagles might have some interest in bringing the gunslinging kid aboard as a backup in 2011. This scared a lot of us....

Watch Kasey Kahne And His Sprint Car Flip Over The Wall At A World of Outlaws Race
If watching cars drive around in circles at Williams Grove Speedway isn't your thing, fast-forward to 1:15 of this video. The driver emerged unhurt, remarkably enough. (H/T Cosby Sweaters)...

Chris Kluwe Responds: Can I Kick It? (Yes, I Can)
Dear Nate Jackson,...

We Honestly Had No Idea Kevin Durant Was So Tatted Up
The Basketball Jones posted this Getty photo yesterday, of Kevin Durant on his Nike China Tour. So many questions....

Miracle On Ice Co-Opted For, What Else, A Presidential Campaign Ad
This week Tim Pawlenty launched his "American Comeback" campaign with an Iowa TV spot featuring the 1980 US Olympic Hockey team. Of course that means ABC's broadcast, which the Pawlenty team didn't get permission from ABC Sports to use (read: they didn't want to pay for it, and it's definitely not...