ac Page 1160 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Why Your Team Sucks: Jacksonville Jaguars
Some people are fans of the Jacksonville Jaguars. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Jacksonville Jaguars. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

If A Photo Of A Norwegian Black Metal Band Is On Deadspin, That Means Shit Is Seriously Messed Up
For real. This is the first snow day since I've been at Gawker, but the server problems are quite severe this time site-wide and it's making everyone's day miserable. So we're shutting it down for today....

NHL's Horrible CBA Comes Back To Bite Them In The Ass
After years of the NHL screwing fans, a few owners are now trying to screw the league. No one weeps for Gary Bettman, because turnabout is foul play....

Calling It Now: First To Worst
Beanie Wells finally ends his mini-holdout, promptly sprains his ankle in first practice. It's going to be one of those seasons for the Cardinals, by which I mean "like all the other seasons besides last year." [Arizona Republic]...

They Know Where Their Bread Is Buttered: Her Ovaries
The WNBA actually backloaded L.A.'s schedule to accommodate Candace Parker's maternity leave; the Sparks have played 5 fewer games than any other team. I only noticed this while playing Streak For The Cash, I swear....

You Mean Twitter <em>Isn't</em> Always The Best Place To Get Your News?
Confusion in Minnesota after Bernard Berrian tweets that Tarvaris Jackson is out for the year. He was just joking, though, to prove some kind of point. There would have been panic, had it not been about Tarvaris Jackson. [PFT]...

Be A Man, McMackin, Everyone's Living On Less These Days
Pay cuts are clearly part of the "new reality." Like this commodities trader will probably take a haircut on his guaranteed $100 million bonus, just because his bank owes taxpayers $44 billion. Then there is Greg McMackin....

Racist Redskins Owner Did Not Listen To His Wife, And Now He Is In Hell
Tomorrow's Washington Post magazine unearths some letters from the Redskins archives to convey "the innocence of this long ago era" when a racist named George Preston Marshall married an actress (pictured) who convinced him to move his football team south....

If You Want a Ride In James Harrison's Smart Car, Ask For a Ride in James Harrison's Smart Car When He Hasn't Won the Super Bowl
James Harrison, who is reportedly afraid of one perfectly dignified method of transportation, showed up to training camp in in a tiny German clown car. He is driving it for the children!...

MORE BREAKING: Blogger Has Crush On Tim Tebow
This day was chock full of Tebow news, huh? Some of it was even covered on the definitive internet address for Tebowniacs, TimTeblog.com. I'll give you one guess who is behind TimTeblog and his name rhymes with Shan Danoff....

World War III Will Be Fought With Dishes And Swishes
President Obama showed the Chinese Vice Premier proper jump shot form, and also quoted Yao Ming. I suppose reducing a nation of one billion to a stereotype isn't so offensive if that stereotype is "they all love basketball." [CBS News]...

David Ortiz Has Your Comment Right Here
Down by two, bottom of the seventh ... three-run home run by Big Papi. Now what were you saying about 2003? [Video via NESN/MLB Network]...

Congress Ends Racism 90 Years Too Late
Both the House and Senate have passed a resolution pardoning former heavyweight champion Jack Johnson for doin' it with white chicks. In a related story, Jack Johnson is still dead. [ESPN]...

Lisa Mayfield Did Not Appreciate The "Whore" Remarks
NASCAR's Jeremy Mayfield is being sued by his stepmother, Lisa, for "slanderous, false and defamatory statements" she says he made about her. You mean the murdering whore thing? Wait ... you were upset about?...

Jamal Anderson Does Not Really Want To Be A Porn Star Named Axel Steelcock
Jamal Anderson doesn't need this agita. A cocaine possession charge in February, and now somebody's hacking into the former Falcon's Facebook account? Well, at least that's what he'd like you to believe....

A One-Day Study On Use And Variance Of "Pussy" Uttered By Brian Urlacher
First Bobby Wade said that Brian Urlacher called new teammate Jay Cutler a pussy. Urlacher denied it. Then Urlacher said the radio stations starting this nonsense were the pussies. Explanations and clarifications disrupt a quiet Wednesday in the Windy City....

Jack Wilson, Ian Snell Released From Pirate Jail
Pittsburgh gives Seattle their shortstop and a nervous nellie pitcher in exchange for a vanload of prospects and an autographed picture of Sasquatch. [MLB.com]...

Shy, Retiring Sort Shockingly Takes To Ustream
Chad Ocho Cinco's doing the Marbury thing on Ustream, minus the God and most of the crazy. At last check, he was wearing a robe, calling Lil Wayne on speakerphone and saying things like, "I'm the new ESPN, man." [Ustream]...

Dr. James Andrews Giveth and Taketh Away
Orthopedic Hall of Famer Dr. James Andrews has saved the careers of countless athletes with his special brand of ligament justice, but occasionally he makes an oops and cripples healthy people for the rest of their lives. No one's perfect....