ac Page 1160 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

So To Recap: He Hates Tennessee
When asked why he hates the Tennessee Volunteers, this Alabama fan does not hold back. I'm not sure what my favorite line is here; there are so many great ones....

Huge Sigh Of Relief Out Of Phoenix Alters National Weather Patterns
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is holed up in a basement next to a big stack of canned goods and bottled water right now. When he isn't preparing for the end of all life as we know it, he can be found tweezing his eyebrows at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...

Aaron Rodgers Assures Cheeseheads He Is In Fact Aaron Rodgers
We are - and possibly always will be - in the throes of the media's fawning send-off to Brett Favre (Wright Thompson is still crying). His successor at Packers QB, Aaron Rodgers, yesterday felt the need to issue one of those communiques that new heads of state usually do when an important leader ste...

They Hate Each Other And We Hate Them
The night before the series finale of The Wire, it's great to be treated to the whitest spectacle in college basketball, UNC versus Duke. The ACC regular season title is on the line for the fifth time in the series' history, which means the Cameron Crazies will have their rote chant sheets ready wit...

Hockey Beefcake As Bad As You Feared
A gallery of hockey hunks for, uh, the ladies. [Orland Kurtenblog]...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your significant other runs down some time on the shot clock ... • Boxing: Featherweights, champion Thomas Mashaba vs. Cristobal Cruz, for the IBO title, at Mashantucket, Conn. (9 p.m., ET). Much more entertaining if you play along with your Wii. Body blow! [ESPN2] • Motor sports: M...

Brett Favre's Fun Can Save Dying Newspapers, End Poverty, Defeat King Koopa
All media junkies have either Poynter or Romenesko bookmarked in their Internet browsers. Those who barely pay attention to the media, let alone stories about the media, the Poynter Institute's website basically acts as a cheerleader for the state of journalism, offering helpful advice yet trying to...

Ministry Is Now Writing NHL Fan Songs
Anyone who had that collegiate/postcollegiate fervor of metal-sledged revolution will remember the anarchic thrust of the band Ministry. Every time we listened to that band, we were convinced the world was collapsing all around us and only our youthful vigor could save it. Then the song would end an...

The Marycuse Orangeapins
The College Basketball Closer is written by the gang at Storming the Floor....

Los Spurs and Rockets Win, While The LeBron Jameses Lose
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who wishes you all a happy freaking Friday. When he's not celebrating the weekend, he can be found playing Texas Hold 'Em at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • We now have an answer to one of life's great mysteries. The Yao Ming-less Rockets are indeed better than the ...

Man's Ashes Have More Fun Than He Ever Did
Dear tiny infant Jesus, or as our brothers in the south call you, "Jezus," please welcome Big George Helms (pictured here) into your Heavenly kingdom. But first, kindly bear with us as his remains take a couple of laps at Las Vegas Motor Speedway. Then its over to the KFC drive-thru, and then straig...

LeBron Scores 50, While "LeBron" Gets Escorted Out Of MSG
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who has no idea what to say about himself today. When he's not blanking out on his own life for Deadspin, he can be found brainfarting at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • New York hearts LeBron. King James gave the Knicks a three-fisted knuckle sandwich of 50 points,...

Ron Artest Says "Raaargh," But Lakers Win Anyway
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who never thought he'd live to see the day when Joel Przybilla could push around Shaquille O'Neal. When he's not having his most cherished basketball memories irrevocably altered by The Big Eraser, he can be found dancing the funky chicken at Basketbawful. E...

Making Peace With Favre's Final Days
As you might have heard, Brett Favre retired today. (Officially. Unofficially. Whatever.) Around these parts, we've had no bigger Favre and Packers loyalist than Jeff Bercovici, an editor at Portfolio and serious Favre man-crusher. Here, he emotes on a historic day, after the jump....

Isiah Thomas Joins "Fire Isiah" Movement
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who thinks Isiah has been trying to get fired for years - I mean, would you want to coach the Knicks? Didn't think so. When he's not trying to make sense of Isiah's substitution patterns, he can be found scrapbooking at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • Okay, seriousl...

Brett Favre Retires. Seriously This Time.
The day you thought would never come has finally arrived: Brett Favre has decided to retire. Let the Craig Nall era begin!...

The Ultimate Warrior Edition
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who thinks there's something morbidly fascinating about a guy who looks like he walked out of a Boris Vellejo painting and is also clinically insane....

Eric Byrnes Can Tolerate Men Staring At His Junk
We haven't heard much from Diamondbacks outfielder Eric Byrnes in the offseason, but we can only guarantee it was something EXTREME AND WHOLLY UNPREDICTABLE! ZIGGITY SWISH! He's back this year, and his Diamondbacks were among the first to be drug tested. Byrnes is absolutely comfortable with the pro...

About Last Night...
What you missed while starting a global lemon wedge scare ... • NBA: Michael Redd just says no to free throws, Spurs win 96-94. • NHL: Everyone duck, here comes Phil Kessel. Bruins top Thrashers in shootout, 3-2. • NASCAR Nationwide Series: Promising up-and-comer Mark Martin wins in Las Vegas....
