ac Page 1164 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's Election Day, And We Will Make No Giants Analogies
Because we are Americans, and this is what we like to call a "democracy," you all should get out and vote today. We have some friends who, if they live in states that have closed primaries, don't vote because they "don't like to be labeled." Hey, who likes to be labeled? We want to vote....
Mr. T Pities Fools, Miami Heat
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not admiring this Rik Smits wallpaper, he can be found country line dancing at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • At least he's in Barkley's Fav...
Dr. Strangeblog, Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying And Love The Closers
To keep the comments as fresh and outstanding as they've been up to this point, we've commissioned Commenting Guru Rob Iracane to write a bi-weekly Comment Ombudsman column. It runs every other week. This is that week....
You Don't Know The Power Of The Dark Side
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not modeling Shaq's "Kazaam" underwear, he can be found studying the ancient art of the Jedi at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • Dark forces r...
Lakers Fans Are A Figment Of Our Imagination
I don't know if I've ever met a single person who rooted solely for Los Angeles Lakers. In my entire life, not one die-hard Lakers fan. That's astounding. This leads me to believe that Lakers fandom is reserved exclusively for celebrities and basketball analysts. If the layman Lakers supporter does ...
Donyell Marshall = 100 Percent Grade A Beefcake
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and who has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not studying the history of Allen Iverson's hairstyles, he can be found cracking wise at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
Bear Down, Barack Obama
We'd completely forgotten about this, even though it's from our home state and followed it pretty closely when it was happening, so we have to thank Sports By Brooks for reminding us: Barack Obama, when he ran for U.S. Senate from Illinois in 2004, was this close to running against ... DITKA!...
Hail To The King, Baby!
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and who has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not memorizing Gheorghe Muresan's Wikipedia entry, he can be found curing cancer at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • "They've got nothing ...
Night of the Living 'Sheed
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and who has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not building a life-sized Dirk Nowitzki out of LEGOs, he can be found making fart jokes at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • They did the m...
Commit To the Indian, Bitches!
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of The FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Chris Paul Creates New And Better Realities, And Improves Conditions
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and who has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not screaming in soulless rage at the merciless Pagan gods, he can be found making fart jokes at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
Just In Time For The Super Bowl: Strawberry Flavored Cheetos
Straight from the Will Leitch test kitchen Japan, get your mouth ready for the taste bud pants party that is Strawberry Flavored Cheetos! (Gagging sound). Poor Japan. Sure they kill whales, but do they deserve this kind of grief? They next thing you know we'll be stocking their shelves with Honey Bu...
The Clashing Of The Titanic Titans
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and who has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not screaming in soulless rage at the merciless Pagan gods, he can be found making fart jokes at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
You Know, This Hornets Team Might Be Pretty Good
The NBA Closer is written by me, J.E. Skeets, high leader of The Moose. When I'm not busy scouring the box scores or part-time modeling, I can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast talkin' shit and spittin' rhymes. Enjoy!...
Put A Cork In The Grey Goose!
A little birdie — with a healthy appetite for sunflower seeds and large-breasted woman — just flew into my apartment and whispered to me that, apparently, ESPN has yanked all coverage of the Dana Jacobson story. How dare they!...
Fake Tats Are An Excellent Recruiting Tool
In today's smash-mouth world of college football recruiting, desperate times call for desperate measures, and desperate measures call for temporary tattoos. That's just the way it is....
You Can't Stop Garnett, You Can Only Hope A Sniper's Shot Slows Him Down
The NBA Closer is written by me, J.E. Skeets, high leader of Canada. When I'm not busy scouring the box scores or part-time modeling, I can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast with some Greek. Enjoy!...
The NBA Is Harshing David Harrison's Mellow
The Pacers' David Harrison, who just failed a drug test, made news the other day when he pointed out that the NBA seems unusually concerned about marijuana and shouldn't test for weed. (He has a point. Dood.) But Indy Cornrows notices that that's not all he had to say....