ac Page 1196 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Barack Obama Will Not Take Away Your Ties Or Your Hair
I don't remember where I saw it, but about a year-and-a-half ago, in one of those "Hey, there's a cool black guy running for President!" stories, the writer posited that Barack Obama, if he were to somehow win (crazy!), would have something immediately in common with John F. Kennedy: He could destro...
Many Primates Still Not Sure Who Won Sunday's NASCAR Race
Condolences to those who were watching the NASCAR Sprint Cup race from Phoenix Motor Speedway on Sunday. Just to fill you in, Jimmie Johnson won. It was high time that auto racing had its own Heidi Bowl, and ABC obliged, awkwardly cutting away from the Checker O'Reilly Auto Parts 500 in the Eastern ...
Time To Party With The 49ers And Cardinals
Only a couple of hours or so until Leitch's Arizona Buzzsaw square off against my San Francisco Forty-Niners, and the big question remains: Who will be the first tonight to remove his pants inappropriately, Matt Leinart or Mike Singletary? Judging from the photo, Matt gets the presumptive nod, espec...
Bill "Spaceman" Lee Defends Manny, Canadians and Irish Assassins
Bill Lee isn't famous because he was a good pitcher for a few years in the 1970s. He's famous (and beloved) because he has absolutely no filtering mechanism between his brain and his mouth. The man is a quote machine and so when Boston recently honored him, Mo Vaughn and Mike Greenwell by inducting ...
Rejected Commenter Theater 5: Assignment Miami Beach
To keep the comments as fresh and outstanding as they've been up to this point, Commenting Guru Rob Iracane will write a bi-weekly Comment Ombudsman column. It runs every other week. This is that week. Mr. Iracane, co-proprietor of the brilliant Walkoff Walk , is also the guy who approves comments ...
College Football Roundup: The Hailey and Hanna Nutt Edition
In honor of BCS clarity arriving (thanks to Iowa we now know that the Big 12 will play the SEC for all the gold in Zimbabwe—that isn't already smuggled to Zurich), we bring you two striking young lasses who recently transferred from Arkansas to rejoin their daddy at Ole Miss. Meet Hailey and Hanna ...
Alabama-LSU: A Friendly Game Of Murder
What a game, huh!? The No. 1 team in the country was taken to overtime on Saturday, the atmosphere was electric, clothes were burned and everyone had a good old SEC time! Well, except for a couple of LSU fans who maybe got a little too carried away by the emotions of the day and ended up the victims...
Offer LSU Kids Free Beer And They'll Burn Anything
On Saturday we posted about LSU fans burning Nick Saban in effigy, which seemed rather hateful and extreme, even for them. Turns out, though, that it was all a promotion for a Baton Rouge condominium company, which provided free food and beer for the students to show up. Corporate schmucks promote h...
Have You Burned Your Former Head Coach In Effigy Lately?
We didn't get to this yesterday, but anything involves college students and fire is usually good copy for the next day. Some of the LSU peeps got together for what looked like a bonfire with a set of clothes as a centerpiece. But it was actually a burning in effigy of former LSU head coach Nick Saba...
Obama Love Can Have No Boundaries (Like Decorum)
This is Vancouver's General Motors Place, home of the Vancouver Canucks. During Tuesday's Canucks-Predators game, the largest cheer came for Barack Obama's ascendancy in American politics. Our time in Canada involved mostly two questions, ad nauseum: "Are you an American?" and "Isn't it great about ...
Afternoon Blogdome: Cause AI and Obama Both Have Lousy Shot Selection
• Rasheed Wallace hooks up the Pistons with Obama Undrcrwn gear, which leads to a very unfortunate AI-Obama comparison from a very white man in desperate need of a segue. [Need4Sheed] • Beisketboll has been berry berry good to Josh Childress in Greece: "We watched a bartender kneel at his feet, and ...
All-Purpose Pitching Machine Also Teaches Kids Not to Lie
We had this one really hard teacher in junior high. You know the type of teacher that thinks they're preparing you for the harsh realities of adulthood through tough love, including random screaming and no late papers and picking books about four grades higher than your class' skill set and wonderin...
College Football Preview: John Parker Wilson's Cell Phone Belongs to the Cajuns
Alabama's John Parker Wilson is the latest SEC player attempting to overcome the LSU fans snagging his cell phone number and listing it everywhere on the internets. Confounding Cajuns. You'll recall that earlier this season Knowshon Moreno and A.J. Green were the victims. They joined Tim Tebow from...
Buck Burnette Just Can't Stop Apologizing for Absent-Minded Facebook Racism
After Texas backup center Buck Burnette was kicked off the team for his idiotic Facebook status comment, he issued a sincere apology that, at the very least, proved he knew what he did was wrong. The online contrition tour continues for Burnette, and now he's fired off another apology via Longhorn f...
Well, They're Back To Square One With The Old Folks Home Flasher Case
Former sprint champion Mark Walcott was cleared on Thursday of charges that he exposed himself five times at two old folks homes in Britain, but at what cost? During the trial it was revealed that Walcott was having affairs with two women at the same time, both of whom were hauled into court to prov...
Cocaine Is A Helluva Drug
That's the second time that phrase has been used today, but in this case it seems much more appropriate. This will air on Friday's "Best Damn Sports Show Period". I love how terrified Chris Rose looks after it happens. It's almost like he's just realized that Lawrence Taylor is, in fact, crazy and ...
Texas Lineman Gets Kicked Off Team for Racist Facebook Message to Barack Obama
The big galoot pictured here is Buck Burnette, back up center for the University of Texas Longhorns. Check that — former back up center. You see, good ol' boy Buck here thought it would be funny to update his Facebook profile status with this message soon after Barack Obama's election: ...
Michael Irvin Shares His Surprising Post-Election Thoughts With the World
ESPN's Mike and Mike in the morning had ex-Cowboys receiver Michael Irvin call in and share his thoughts about last night's election of Barack Obama. He spoke candidly and passionately about what it meant to him, without much of a filter and what seemed little preparation. Based on some of Irvin's p...
And in Just a Few Hours We'll Find Out If There Is An College Football Playoff In Our Future....
Everybody knows what today is. The importance of it, what's at stake, all that. There's no way to avoid it. Whoever walks away with the most colored areas from the CNN map tonight, it'll be a good thing. Tomorrow we'll at least be able to look forward to something different in 2009. Those who did vo...
Election Night: An Excuse To Stay Up Past 8:30
Well, it's here. When I was a kid, Election Night was one of the few nights of the year I was allowed to stay up past 8:30. (Seriously, my bedtime was 8:30 until I was a freshman in high school. And you wonder why I still wet the bed.) I never knew who any of the candidates were, or even what the "...