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No, You've Got It All Wrong, Fellas. Brady Quinn LOVES The Gays
Brady Quinn would like to make it clear: He does not hate gay people. Responding to accusations that he hurled gay slurs at a group of men in a New Year's Eve altercation in Columbus, Ohio, Quinn said on Wednesday that, nope, it never happened. And furthermore, you know that Brokeback Mountain seque...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after tripping and smashing a 290-year-old Stradivarius ... • College basketball: St. John's at Cincinnati (7 p.m., ET); Kansas State at Texas Tech (9 p.m., ET) [ESPN2]. Has Pat Knight won a game yet? • College basketball: Maryland at Duke (7 p.m., ET). Do not anger the turtle. [ESPN] ...
Brady Quinn Attacks His Only Fans Left
Remember that famous "Saturday Night Live" sketch, in which William Shatner famous told Trekkies to "get a life, for crying out loud, it's just a TV show?" Even though it was just a sketch, it took him years to make it up to his rabid and most loyal supporters. We suspect Brady Quinn, in a much le...
A Visit Back To The Old Campus
You. Yeah, you. You're sitting in class at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, drawing doodles of Ron Zook on the water skis, and you're bored. You obviously aren't like us, because, you know, you're actually in class. You can change that, though. In about an hour and a half, we're going...
Sweet Home Oak Brook
After a weekend of dead cold out sleeping, we are back on the ole book tour business and ready to rock tonight. We are back in the Midwest, where we are most comfortable. And by "comfortable," we mean "freaking freezing."...
The Patriots Petition: Greatest Hits
Time to check in on the petition for the NFL to investigate the final 1:40 of Super Bowl XLII, as seen on Petition Online.com (and mentioned here on Saturday). Petitions on this site are usually pretty tepid, bewildering affairs: Take for example petition for the betterment of UNC football (26 signa...
Lunch Break With Judas Priest
Clare, get a Flyers chant going on while I'm gone....
Rock Out With Your Shuttlecock Out
Nobody knows what it's like to be Wong Choong Han: The nationally ranked shuttler is feeling a little pressure to succeed in upcoming natoinal play. Wong, in a rare moment of self-reflection, realizes that if he doesn't get his shit together before the German Open, his top-three status in the Badmin...
The Night Eli Manning Became A Man
• Hey, the Giants won the Super Bowl. Really. • Poor Kevin Hart. • The last Jambaroo until next season. • How to sneak into the Giants victory parade. • Fire Joe Morgan is one-third Mose Schrute. • Patriots fans try to come to terms. • BOO, Gordon! • Take that, Tiki. • Shaq to the Suns? Amazing. • P...
Tonight's The Last West Coast Stop: Howdy, Seattle
The God Save The Fan tour hits Seattle tonight, and it's our type of event, because it's at a bar. Both the reading, and the "afterparty." Both involving booze. Sounds good....
When You're Pushed, Killing's As Easy As Breathing
Maybe you've lost your faith in people. But you must still be faithful to something. You must still care about something. Maybe we can't change what is. But trying to save a life isn't wasting your life, is it....
The Final Jamboroo And The Art Of Being A Sports Fan Without Watching Sports
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon. Well, until today, anyway....
We Left Our Heart In Alameda
By the time you actually read this — this is one of those "future" "posted" items — we will be on the road, screaming up the Golden State Freeway (we can't take the scenic route: No time!) to Alameda, for the next stop of the book tour business....
OK, Last Photoshop, We Promise!
Except for the ones below, that is. There's just so many amusing ones out there, that it's hard to stop. And now, for the final word on Super Bowl XLII, we'll hand the mic over to Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force, who as you might imagine is quite enthused with the result. In fact, it may be his fin...
Trying To Figure Out That Crazy Shaq-Suns Trade
It's pretty rare, in this sports world we all love, fear and hold dear, to find something that everyone agrees on. Unanimity of opinion is non-existent; we sometimes wonder if you held a poll saying, "Would you like to be punched in the face right now?" the margin would still have at least 0.001 pe...
Time For Us And Pau To Make Our LA Debuts
All right, time for stop two of this whole book tour business: Los Angelenos, get thee to Book Soup. And the night is not over then: After that is when the real fun starts....
Whining About Patriots' Loss Now A Greater Threat Than Global Warming
So this is somewhat amusing. According to Amani Toomer, before the game on Sunday Patriots' players were inviting him to their victory parties. "They were inviting us to their parties after the game," Toomer said. "They showed us no respect." Meanwhile, Tom Brady has dropped out of the Pro Bowl (exp...
Boy, Did You Ever Miss A Barnburner At MSG Last Night
So, if there were ever a day for the Knicks to finally get fed up with Isiah Thomas and end this madness, today would seem like a good one....
Mr. T Pities Fools, Miami Heat
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not admiring this Rik Smits wallpaper, he can be found country line dancing at Basketbawful. Enjoy! • At least he's in Barkley's Fav...