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Week in Deadspin: Brokeback Mountain Men
• Wildly irresponsible rumors about Peyton Manning and Kenny Chesney. Nice hats, gentlemen. • We saw Bill Simmons and Chuck Klosterman hang out together online, and then we saw it in person. And then Bill deconstructed himself better than we ever could. • Etan Thomas loves analyzing Abe Pollin's p...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as your family reminisces about that time you actually had dinner with them ... • College FB: Air Force at Colorado State. How does one win at Washington, then lose at home against Wyoming? Oh, that's right — these players actually go to class. [ESPN] • MLB: Yankees at Orioles. Yanks' ...
Blogdome: Bill Simmons Edition
• Sports blogger goes after Bill and Chuck for trashing sports bloggers. [The Mighty MJD] • In full book promotion mode, Bill shows up on blogger radio show and actually predicts the Yankees to win. [Mr. Irrelevant] • The Phillies might be pretty much done in the playoff chase, but hey, look, they'r...
Yeah, Red Smith Totally Used To Eat Weird Crap
OK, so we were just watching the rerun of this morning's episode of ESPN2's "Cold Pizza" — we can only watch the same "SportsCenter" so many times before our soul starts to collapse into powder — and we saw Hometown Columnist Woody Paige eat a whole canister of dog food....
Tom Brady The Next Namath In More Ways Than One
We were pleased to see that Patriots quarterhunk Tom Brady shook off his hangover enough to lead the Pats to a last-minute victory over the Steelers last week; we were beginning to become somewhat concerned about his tendency to get all bombed and start hitting on Olsen twins....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while being harangued by John McCain on national TV ... • MLB: Padres win to pull to .500. Oh, and they also clinch the NL West. • MLB: Yankees regain lead, Red Sox fans regain comfortable loser image. • Tennis: Federer advances in Thailand Open, easing your deep concerns....
Blogdome: The Hell Of Being A Padres Fan
• "I don't care what you do now. Go ahead and win the dumb division. Or just keep crapping all over yourselves. I could care less either way. I have the Chargers and my Gloria Gaynor CDs." [Gas Lamp Ball] • Eddy Curry is either brooding over the way the Bulls are treating him, or sitting at home get...
If Tom Cruise Were A Lineman
As obsessive as Madden 2006 players tend to be, we're surprised it took this long to be discovered, but it appears a glitch in the game has Jets offensive lineman Michael King listed as seven inches high. (That's him in the picture, doing a pretty excellent job at blocking a Buccaneer, considering...
In The Wake Of Chad
We've always liked Jets fans, if just because they have that unique New York blend of bitter cynicism and unabashed homerism toward their team. They're like the woman who has nothing nice to say about her spoiled younger sister ... but she'll have your throat if you do....
To Watch Tonight ...
What light through yonder window breaks? 'Tis Doritos, and this picante sauce is the sun ... • College FB: Tennessee at LSU. The only group of Volunteers who are not welcome in Louisiana. [ESPN2] • MNF: Chiefs at Broncos. If you have any idea what John Madden is talking about, please let us know. [A...
Roger Clemens And His Funny Shirts
More Webshot findings from the ladies of On The DL, and though none are quite as damning as the married Brandon Arroyo housing poor college students on his lap, there's still some pretty fun stuff. Not least of which are creative shirt designs from Phillies outfielder Pat Burrell (whom this blind ...
NFL Roundup: Kickers Soak Up All The Drama
• Like everyone else who is prone to breaking their spine whenever there's a stiff wind, we've always had an affinity for kickers. So when Cowboys bully tackle Larry Allen went after former XFL kicker Jose Cortez after he missed an extra point — to be fair, Cortez got a little lipp — we cringed th...
Week In Deadspin: Is Manny Wearing A Ron Mexico Jersey?
• You thought Ryan Farnsworth was bad. You thought Bronson Arroyo tarting it up with college students who aren't his wife was bad. You thought that A-Rod and his wife living as closet swingers was bad. Until you have seen Manny Ramirez teaching people how to dance, you ain't seen nothing. NOTHING!...
The Lactating Rafael Palmeiro
Well, now it appears that the "secret source" for Rafael Palmeiro's steroid wasn't a "source" or, for that matter, a "steroid." (But Palmeiro's name was, in fact, spelled correctly.) It turns out that Palmeiro told Congress that Orioles shortstop Miguel Tejada gave Palmeiro a B-12 Vitamin, which i...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while building a giant peanut out of thousands of regular peanuts ... • Monarchs win WNBA title! Whoa, calm down people of Sacramento! (Sound of crickets). • MLB: Ladies and gentlemen, your division-leading San Diego Padres. • MLB: Yankees beat Orioles, remain a half-game back in que...
Donovan McNabb, White Quarterback
We're not Professional Sports Columnists, but we'd have to say, just to keep our noses clean, the last thing we'd mention when discussing Eagles QB Donovan McNabb would be race. We'd mention his hairline, his goatee, even his ridiculous commercials, but race? That's OK, thanks, we'll be over here ...
The Greatest Team Name Of All Time
Sad day in the world of badminton: The New Zealand national badminton team has changed its name. What was it, you ask? Why, the New Zealand Black Cocks, of course....
Blogdome: San Diego Padres Edition
• What team scares the Cardinals the most? Would you believe the Padres? [Viva El Birdos] • Padres blogger: Don't hate us, American League! [Gas Lamp Ball] • Redskins fans might be a little too excited about that win last night. [Mr. Irrelevant] • Alabama school president in serious danger of damagi...
Jose Canseco, Professional Wrestler (Of Course)
We're not even going to pretend to be surprised here: Jose Canseco is rumored to making an appearance at Wrestlemania this spring. Perhaps it is telling that the people who are most concerned about this development are not baseball fans, but wrestling fans. Seems like the WWE — remember, that's wh...
NFL Roundup: Daunte's Blues
• If you somehow were able to make an emotionless, painless robot clone of Bea Arthur, and you pounded that clone in the face with a polo mallet for 25 minutes, then slammed that head in a car door 15 times, then severed the head with an exceptionally long and sharp toenail, then put the head in a...