ale Page 177 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A-Rod Whacks Dong
Alex Rodriguez hit his first home run of the season today in Detroit, giving the Yankees an early lead thanks to A-Rod’s massive dong....

These Animated Soccer Highlights Are Super Cool
Over at Bleacher Report, animator Case Jernigan has made artistic renderings of some of this season’s most memorable soccer tricks and feints. The results are pretty awesome:...

D-Backs Manager Chip Hale Is Mad The Media Was Excited About Opening Day
The Diamondbacks’ season got off to a rough start last night. Newly acquired ace Zack Greinke, who signed for $206 million this offseason and could very well help the D-Backs become a wild card contender, got knocked around by the Colorado Rockies and Arizona lost 10-5. After the game, Diamondbacks ...

Finland's Brilliant Baby Boxes Are Finally Coming To Countries That Need Them, Like Ours
Having a new baby sounds, to put it lightly, terrifying. I imagine this is especially true at first, when particularly helpless infants are sent home with necessarily inexperienced parents. Baby-wise friends and family members can help, but it’s still pretty dangerous to put a total neophyte—like yo...

USMNT Players Ether Abby Wambach
USWNT legend Abby Wambach has had a rough stretch of late. If you recall a few months ago, Wambach had some very dumb thoughts about foreign players representing the USMNT. This weekend, she was arrested and charged with a DUI. And after that news broke, the USMNT’s Alejandro Bedoya tied both incide...

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Makes a Good Brain Pun
Dale Earnhardt Jr. is donating his brain to science, in a generous move, and says it’s a literal “no-brainer” decision. Nice....

Celebrity Fight Referee: D’Angelo Russell and Nick Young Race to the Bottom
Sports are cool but I was not trained in the art of figuring out if one enormous man hit another enormous man in the right or wrong way. I do, however, have years of experience dissecting the wack-ass behavior of celebrities....

Here's DJ Khaled's Motivational Playground Workout
DJ Khaled not only knows how to expel excellent life advice, but, here, also proves you don’t need expensive gym equipment to get in a good workout. Just hit up a local playground, push the kiddies aside and get to work on that medicine ball....

D'Angelo Russell Apologized To Nick Young, Who May Or May Not Have Accepted It
D’Angelo Russell and Nick Young spoke to the media before tonight’s game against the Heat, and addressed a number of issues surrounding the video Russell shot of Young talking about hooking up with a girl at a club, that later leaked to a celebrity gossip website....

Report: Lakers Angry At D’Angelo Russell Over Leaked Nick Young Video
Lakers players are angry at teammate D’Angelo Russell, have no trust in him, and are refusing to sit with him at meals, according to a report from Baxter Holmes and Marc Stein: ...

Just What The Hell Is Going On With Vincent D'Onofrio's Accent In This Pelé Movie?
Pelé—once an inspirational global icon as the widely recognized greatest soccer player of all time, now a smiling leathery husk dragged around the world for the enrichment of his handlers and the brands they license him to—has a movie coming out about his early life. From what we’ve seen in the trai...

3 Soccer Guys Try One-Upping Each Other With Horrible Gaffes; 2nd Guy Wins Easily
When you see why Quilmes’s Daniel Imperiale is all hunched over looking like he’s about to puke from embarrassment, you’ll understand how his display of complete ineptitude overshadowed the two blunders that sandwiched it. Who knew ten seconds was enough for three players in a row to shit themselves...

Lacrosse Goalie Flattens Lacrosse Guy Who Tried To Bring That Weak Shit
Don’t you even think about bringing that weak shit near Alex Buque’s goal, or he’ll turn you into dust....

A-Rod To Retire Once The Yankees Have Paid Him Every Cent They Owe Him, And Not A Moment Before
After an MLB witch-hunt designed to force him out of the game in shame, the Yankees’ repeated attempts to void his contract and his milestone bonus money, and a comeback season that earned him redemption—if only as a foil to more actively sinister forces—Alex Rodriguez said today that he will retire...

Report: Lakers Investigating Sexual Harassment Allegation Against Nick Young And Jordan Clarkson (UPDATED)
The Los Angeles Lakers are investigating after a woman accused guards Nick Young and Jordan Clarkson of sexually harassing her and her mother on Sunday night, reports ESPN....

What On Earth Is Going On With José Mourinho's Manchester United Pre-Contract?
We can all agree that the big takeaway from the pre-contract José Mourinho has reportedly signed with Manchester United is the simple fact that, after a few months on the sidelines, no doubt stewing over the calamity that was his final season at Chelsea, our man Mourinho will almost certainly be bac...

Aleksandar Mitrovic Celebrates With Idiot On The Field After Scoring A Late Equalizer
Newcastle tied up Sunderland late to secure a 1-1 draw. Aleksandar Mitrovic scored the equalizer, and was understandably pumped since it came in the 83rd minute against a rival. Mitrovic ran away from all his buddies to celebrate with this jeans-wearing Geordie....

Yale, Everybody
Architects of the next financial crisis, right here....

Roman Politicians Outraged Over Video Of Supposed Soccer Fan Peeing On Homeless Woman
What was already a bad week for asshole soccer fans in Europe got worse yesterday, after video that appears to show a group of men—allegedly Sparta Prague fans in town for their team’s Europa League match against Lazio—tormenting and abusing a homeless woman, with one even urinating on her....