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Of course the NFL’s latest global expansion screws fans stateside
The NFL’s plan for global domination took another step forward this week as the league announced it will play a game in South America for the first time. Cue the trumpets, horns and dollar bills falling from the sky like confetti. Get ready, Brazil, here comes a little bloodsport to pique your morbi...

The NFL has an offensive line problem — and help is not on the way
The league has an offensive line problem, according to longtime lineman Andrew Whitworth. ...

Amazon can't be happy with another episode of <i>Thursday Night Football</i> Comedy Hour
Thursday is upon us, which means the end of the work week is near. It also means another installment of Thursday Night Football featuring another lousy matchup. This one could be the trailer for a Hollywood comedy: Bad Backups. That’s the general consensus about tonight’s TNG game between the New En...

Who else but the Yankees would release a statement about Henry Kissinger dying?
There is probably a long treatise on how a crumbling empire of a baseball team wants to honor Henry Kissinger, the architect of American exceptionalism being an excuse to do whatever that country wants around the world that only led to this crumbling empire, but quite frankly I’m too tired and incap...

Attention Amazon shoppers: It’s Coach Prime Day!
Welcome to Coach Prime Day (patent pending) where everything is for sale. Tablets, air fryers, backpacks, integrity, you name it, Coach Prime will endorse it. (No idea if Deion Sanders signed off to endorse this advertorial, but we should probably run it by legal before we get a cease, and desist fr...

This is not a drill: Taylor Swift is at the Chiefs game with Mama Kelce
Travis Kelce deserves one of those Bobby Bonilla/Magic Johnson-type contracts after the money he will soon make the Kansas City Chiefs. His new situationship with Taylor Swift will launch his post-football career into the stratosphere, but that is a long play. In the immediate, he has made the Chief...

The NCAA shortened football games only to shove more ads into broadcasts
College football is changing at such a rapid pace that it’s hard to keep track of every alteration. One example is the new rule that keeps the clock rolling after a first down. In recent years, it went from a full stop after moving the chains to pausing until the ref spots the ball. Now it only stop...

Coach Prime is indispensable, according to Coach Prime
Welcome to Deadspin’s The Sports Nihilist, where all is for naught and we are but accidental jolts of electrified meat stuck to the surface of a rock in an indifferent universe. Fuck you....

And on the seventh day, Jonathan Isaac created sneakers
Business is about seeing the marketplace before the consumer knows they need it, and then capitalizing. I’m actually pretty certain that’s why it’s called capitalism. Sure, I didn’t go to business school, I don’t have an MBA, but you know who else didn’t go to business school? LeBron James, Tracy Mc...

ESPN breaks up its broadcast superteam-in-slacks as Jeff Van Gundy enters NBA free agency
As ESPN reaches the end of its fiscal year today, the Worldwide Leader has commenced its semi-annual purge of top talent. On Wednesday, the pink slip Russian Roulette landed on Jeff Van Gundy, after 16 years with the network....

It’s not about what you’re worth, Saquon, it’s about what you can get
It’s wild how submissive the New York Giants were during the Daniel Jones contract negotiations when you consider how steadfast the front office has been with Saquon Barkley. The star running back has until July 17 to figure out a new deal, but after that will either have to sign off on the $10.1 mi...

Dalvin Cook cut a reminder that the NFL treats RBs like Amazon warehouse workers
Being a running back is a great way to get recruited. In high school, RBs frequently have the ball in their hands, and it doesn’t take much for their talent to be recognized. Little Johnny fakes out two linebackers, runs over a safety, and then glides into not only the end zone, but also a college s...